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Clips from South Park - Cartoon Wars: Part 1 (S10E10)

"Well, maybe we can just have tea."
South Park
"You mean like the time you had tea with Mohammed,"
South Park
"the prophet of the Muslim faith?"
South Park
"Come on, Mohammed, let's get some tea."
South Park
"Try my Mister T tea."
South Park
"Anyway, I can't believe I invited my old sweetheart to dinner."
South Park
"Oh, man. That's not cool. Seriously, that is not cool."
South Park
"of the religion of an entire group of people!"
South Park
"Do you care at all about people's feelings?"
South Park
"Since when do you care about being sensitive to people's religion, Cartman?"
South Park
"Yeah, you rip on people's religion all the time!"
South Park
"How would you feel, Kyle,"
South Park
"if there was a cartoon on television that made fun of Jews all the time?"
South Park
"I'm telling you guys, it's wrong."
South Park
"It's wrong!"
South Park
"It's wrong!"
South Park
"Hey, Brian, this is like the time I got a job as a carrot cake."
South Park
"It's Family Guy! Quick, Gerald, do something!"
South Park
"It's okay. It's dead."
South Park
"Mom, it was nothing!"
South Park
"You boys don't understand anything!"
South Park
"It's obvious that you all need Muslim sensitivity training!"
South Park
"Welcome to Muslim Sensitivity Training."
South Park
"It is important for us to understand why the Muslims"
South Park
"feel the way they do"
South Park
"and why we can never show an image of Mohammed."
South Park
"No, Muslims can't show an image of Mohammed."
South Park
"Kyle, you're not being very sensitive."
South Park
"Yeah, Kyle. Maybe you think this is funny,"
South Park
"but the rest of us don't."
South Park
"Let's all look at why Muslims are upset."
South Park
"First of all, in the Muslim religion, you're not allowed to have what?"
South Park
"Sex. Good."
South Park
"Now, this would be fine, except that in the Muslim religion you also can't..."
South Park
"Anybody? Jack off."
South Park
"Okay? Jacking it is strictly forbidden in the Muslim religion."
South Park
"And what do we know about the places Muslims live?"
South Park
"They live in..."
South Park
"Good. Sand."
South Park
"Now put yourself in the shoes of a Muslim."
South Park
"It's Friday night, but you can't have sex and you can't jack off."
South Park
"There's sand in your eyes and probably in the crack of your ass,"
South Park
"and then some cartoon comes along from a country"
South Park
"where people are getting laid and mocks your prophet."
South Park
"Well, you know what? I'd be pretty pissed off, too!"
South Park
"Mr. Garrison, that is ignorant and racist!"
South Park
"Muslims are mad because of Family Guy,"
South Park
"not because they can't jack off. Right, Wendy?"
South Park
"Proceed to the school gymnasium immediately"
South Park
"for an emergency announcement!"
South Park
"Quiet, students! Quiet!"
South Park
"Once again, we have just learnt"
South Park
"that the Family Guy episode featuring Mohammed"
South Park
"was only part one of a two-parter!"
South Park
"And part two is going to air next week with Mohammed uncensored."
South Park
"- What? - Why would they..."
South Park
"Fo x studios claims that the Family Guy writing staff"
South Park
"has demanded the Mohammed character"
South Park
"be seen in full view."
South Park
"The head of Fo x had this to say."
South Park
"Family Guy is our biggest show!"
South Park
"Family Guy! I damn you to hell!"
South Park
"This time even more massive!"
South Park
"And terrorist leader Al-Zawahri has issued a threat!"
South Park
"Retaliation?"
South Park
"Oh, my God, m'kay?"
South Park
"Goddamn Family Guy. Now they're just provoking people."
South Park
"You guys, this is serious."
South Park
"- We have to do something! - Like what?"
South Park
"We have to go and try to get that episode pulled."
South Park
"You guys with me?"
South Park
"Dude, we can't go anywhere,"
South Park
"Then we'll ride our Big Wheels!"
South Park
"We have to talk to the network."
South Park
"The Family Guy writers aren't gonna back down!"
South Park
"I don't trust for one second"
South Park
"If 10 people die because Family Guy just had to have their little joke,"
South Park
"will you still think it's funny?"
South Park
"I'm going to Los Angeles, and I'm gonna do whatever I can"
South Park
"to get that episode pulled before this gets out of hand."
South Park
"Somebody has to speak for the Muslim people."
South Park
"Kyle! Kyle, wake up! We have to go!"
South Park
"- Dad, are you sure this time? - This isn't a joke, Kyle."
South Park
"Bombs have already gone off in six cities!"
South Park
"- No! - Wait a minute!"
South Park
"- Where's Ike? - He was just here!"
South Park
"Ice cream! I want chocolate!"
South Park
"Kyle!"
South Park
"I didn't come to stop you. I think you're right, Cartman."
South Park
"Yeah, well, I don't need a partner on this."
South Park
"Especially one who doesn't trust me."
South Park
"but I think it's pretty amazing. And I think it's real."
South Park
"I just wanna do something right, you know?"
South Park
"Just this one time."
South Park
"It's a long trip, dude. You're gonna need help."
South Park
"We can try and get the episode pulled, together."
South Park
"You know, we might not even make it into the studio."
South Park
"I know, but just like you, I feel like I have to try."
South Park
"People can really get hurt. And a joke just isn't worth that."
South Park
"So what made you change your mind?"
South Park
"- Well, Kyle, we better get going. - Yeah!"
South Park
"- Let's do this! - All right, let's roll!"
South Park
"People! People, quiet, please!"
South Park
"We must not panic."
South Park
"Part two of the Family Guy episode airs in six days!"
South Park
"I believe that Professor Thomas, from the university,"
South Park
"Muslim terrorists and extremists are threatening us"
South Park
"for what Family Guy is going to do"
South Park
"because they've wrongly grouped us together."
South Park
"Our only hope is to make the Muslim extremists know"
South Park
"That even though the episode aired,"
South Park
"we didn't watch it, we didn't hear it, and we didn't talk about it."
South Park
"So how do we do that?"
South Park
"We take 20 to 25 dump trucks, fill them with sand from Monarch Lake"
South Park
"By using approximately 18 dozen shovels,"
South Park
"we could each dig a hole in the sand,"
South Park
"stick our heads in the holes, and then have the person to our left bury them."
South Park
"deep in sand before the Mohammed episode airs,"
South Park
"we could avoid looking like we're responsible for any part of this at all."
South Park
"No. No. Wait a minute, that's ridiculous."
South Park
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