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Clips from The Big Bang Theory - The Big Bran Hypothesis (S01E01)

"Here you go. Pad Thai, no peanuts."
The Big Bang Theory
"Since it's not bee season, you can have my epinephrine."
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"Here we go."
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"yeah, call it whatever you want, I get minimum wage."
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"Hello."
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"- Hey, Sheldon. - Hi."
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"Or in your case, a cheesecake-scented goddess."
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"Thank you."
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"I do like the one where Lois Lane falls from the helicopter..."
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"Superman's flight is a feat of strength."
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"How does he fly at night?"
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"Challenge accepted."
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"Okay. Now we've got an inclined plane."
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"Exactly half."
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"I'm doing this to be a good neighbor."
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"In any case, there's no way it could lower the odds."
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"- you okay? - No, it hurt--"
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"Great Caesar's ghost, look at this place."
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"A little messy?"
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"This is chaos."
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"Explain to me a system..."
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"No."
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"- Come on, we should go. - Hang on."
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"Thank you again."
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"- Sheldon? - Shh!"
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"Are you insane?"
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"Don't be ridiculous. I have no peers."
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"If you have time to lean, you have time to clean."
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"Sarcasm?"
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"Penny's up."
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"I think what you're feeling is valid and maybe later today..."
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"I mean, they let themselves into my place, and then they cleaned it."
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"Okay? And you don't shoot to wound."
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"It's obvious they meant well."
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""Penny, just as Oppenheimer came to regret his contributions to the first atomic bomb..."
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"- One package Philips head screws? - Check."
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"Guys, seriously, I grew up on a farm, okay?"
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"I rebuilt a tractor engine when I was, like, 12."
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"- Oh, boy, I was afraid of this. - What?"
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"For example, Penny has a flatscreen TV..."
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"If water's involved, we'll ground the crap out of the thing."
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"Does it have peanut oil?"
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"I'm not sure."
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"Everyone keep an eye on Howard in case he starts to swell up."
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"- Any chopsticks? - Don't need chopsticks, this is Thai food."
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"Thailand has had the fork since the latter half of the 19th century."
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"They don't put the fork in their mouth, they use it to put the food on a spoon..."
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"...which then goes into their mouth."
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"Ask him for a napkin, I dare you."
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"I'll get it."
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"Do I look puffy? I feel puffy."
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"- Hey, Leonard. - Oh, hi, Penny."
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"- Am I interrupting? - No."
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"You're not swelling, Howard."
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"No, look at my fingers, they're like Vienna sausages."
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"- Sounds like you have company. - They're not going anywhere."
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"So you're coming home from work. That's great. How was work?"
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"you know, it's a Cheesecake Factory..."
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"...people order cheesecake and I bring it to them."
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"So you kind of act as like a carbohydrate delivery system?"
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"yeah."
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"I was wondering if you could help me out--"
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"- Yes. - Oh."
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"Okay, great, I'm having some furniture delivered..."
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"...and I may not be here, so, oh--"
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"I'm sorry?"
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"Haven't you ever been told how beautiful you are in flawless Russian?"
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"- No, I haven't. - Get used to it."
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"yeah, I probably won't."
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"Hey, Raj."
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"Still not talking to me, huh?"
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"Don't take it personally, it's his pathology."
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"- He can't talk to women. - He can't talk to attractive women."
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"- There's gonna be some furniture delivered? - yeah."
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"If it gets here and I'm not here, could you sign for it and put it in?"
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"- Yeah, no problem. - Great, here's my spare key."
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"- Penny, wait. - yeah?"
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"Um...."
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"If you don't have any other plans..."
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"...do you wanna join us for Thai food and a Superman movie marathon?"
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"A marathon? Wow, how many Superman movies are there?"
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"you're kidding, right?"
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"...and Superman catches her."
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"- Which one was that? - One."
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"You realize that scene was rife with scientific inaccuracy?"
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"yes, I know, men can't fly."
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"No, let's assume that they can."
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"Lois Lane is falling."
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"Superman swoops down to save her by reaching out two arms of steel."
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"Miss Lane, who is now traveling..."
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"...at approximately 120 miles an hour, hits them..."
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"...and is immediately sliced into three equal pieces."
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"Unless Superman matches her speed and decelerates."
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"In what space, sir? In what space?"
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"She's 2 feet above the ground."
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"If he really loved her, he'd let her hit the pavement."
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"- lt would be a more merciful death. - That doesn't--"
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"Excuse me, your entire argument is predicated on the assumption..."
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"...that Superman's flight is a feat of strength."
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"Are you listening to yourself?"
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"An extension of his ability to leap buildings..."
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"...an ability he derives from exposure to sun--"
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"A combination of the moon's solar reflection..."
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"...and the energy storage capacity of Kryptonian skin cells."
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"I'm just gonna go wash up."
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"I have 2600 comic books in there."
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"I challenge you to find a single reference to Kryptonian skin cells."
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"We're locked out."
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"Also, the pretty girl left."
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"Okay."
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"Her apartment's on the fourth floor, elevator is broken, you're gonna--"
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"Oh, you're just gonna be done? Okay, cool, thanks."
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"- I guess we'll just bring it up ourselves. - I hardly think so."
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"Why not?"
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"Well, we don't have a dolly..."
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"...or lifting belts, or any measurable upper-body strength."
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"We don't need strength. We're physicists."
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"We are the intellectual descendents of Archimedes."
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"Give me a fulcrum and a lever and I can move the Earth."
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"It's just a matter-- I don't have this! I do not have this!"
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