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Clips from The Big Bang Theory - The Lunar Excitation (S03E03)

"I tell you, this is my new Grey's Anatomy."
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"Although I suppose..."
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"- She dumped you? - She didn't dump me."
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"Something's very wrong."
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"How can you bounce stuff off the moon? There's no gravity."
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"...in his paper Zur Quantentheorle der Strahlung..."
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"Oh, that's very cool."
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"Cool, it's gonna be in 3-D?"
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"Preparing to fire laser at the moon."
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"- Should we invite them to the party? - No, just keep walking."
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"I'm telling you, dude..."
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"Twelve, if you count the ones who showed up and left."
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"- I can't bring the nitrogen tank down. - Why not?"
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"Ugh. Not this again."
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"...one, of necessity, develops a keen sense of hearing."
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"Wonder why she didn't say goodbye."
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"Doesn't have to be tonight. I'm free pretty much always."
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"Can we just forget it ever happened?"
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"The dating site matched a woman with Sheldon."
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"- Since when? - I'll show you a picture..."
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"Whatever."
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"You remember when we used to have sex..."
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"She's not coming back."
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"- Uh-oh. She wants to meet us. - Not us. Him."
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"Well, Howard wanted to write "mumbo jumbo," but I said no."
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"Okay, I'm out."
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"...that all forms of physical contact up to and including coitus are off the table."
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"Okay, we've got power to the laser."
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"I should've brought an umbrella."
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"- What for? It's not gonna rain. - I know."
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"But with skin as fair as mine, moon burn is a real possibility."
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"That's a buzzinga, right?"
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"One of my best, don't you think?"
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"Howard, double-check the equatorial mount on the laser."
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"- We need it locked on the Sea of Tranquility. - You got it."
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"Raj, no."
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"Billions of dollars have gone into inventing the Internet..."
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"...and filling it with pictures of naked women so we don't have to peep through windows."
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"It's not like that. I'm watching someone's TV."
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"The Good Wife is on."
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"Leonard, what is that? What is that?"
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"Relax, it's just a dirty sock."
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"How on earth can you say "dirty sock" and "relax" in the same sentence?"
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"Sheldon, the world is filled with dirty, discarded socks."
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"Not my world."
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"You know who'd really dig seeing this experiment? Penny."
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"I wasn't aware that lunar ranging was her thing."
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"...the retro reflector left on the moon by Neil Armstrong..."
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"...does qualify as a shiny object."
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"Ask her to come up."
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"I don't know. It's still weird since, you know..."
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"We were just in different places in the relationship."
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"I fail to see how a relationship..."
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"...can have the qualities of a geographic location."
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"Well, it's very simple. Leonard was living in a town called Please Don't Leave Me..."
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"...while Penny had just moved to the island of Bye-bye."
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"Screw you, guys. I'm gonna go see if she's home."
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"If it's not too much trouble, I'd like to point this at the moon now."
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"Wait a second. The good wife is crying."
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"Oh, hi. What's going on?"
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"We're up on the roof bouncing laser beams off the moon."
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"I'm sorry, what?"
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"It's cool. We've got a two-meter parabolic reflector and everything."
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"- I thought you might wanna see it. - That makes no sense."
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"Oh, Leonard, this is Zack. Zack, Leonard."
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"- Hey. - Sorry, I didn't know you were busy."
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"- Maybe another time. - Yeah. Maybe."
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"- Hey, I wanna see this laser thing. - Oh, what about the party?"
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"It's a surprise party, doesn't matter when we get there."
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"Right."
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"Okay, well, yeah, come on up."
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"So how'd you guys meet?"
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"My company designs the menus for The Cheesecake Factory."
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"Your company?"
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"My dad, but me and my sister are VPs."
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"So menus."
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"It sounds easy, but there's a lot of science that goes into designing them."
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"Happy now? I'm moving the dirty sock."
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"Thank you."
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"Raj, keep an eye out for the other one."
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"- Hey, guys. This is my friend Zack. - Hey."
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"- Hello. - Whoa, is that the laser? It's bitchen."
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"Yes. In 1917..."
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"...when Albert Einstein established the theoretic foundation for the laser..."
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"...his fondest hope was that the resultant device be "bitchen.""
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"Well, mission accomplished."
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"Let me explain what we're doing here."
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"In 1969, the astronauts on Apollo 11..."
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"...positioned reflectors on the moon."
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"We're gonna shoot a laser off one of them..."
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"...and let the light bounce back into this photomultiplier."
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"One question: How can you be sure it won't blow up?"
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"- The laser? - The moon."
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"See, now this is a man for Penny."
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"- That's a great question, Zack. - No, it's not."
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"- Sheldon, play nice. - It's not a great question."
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"How could somebody possibly think we're going to blow up the moon?"
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"That's a great question."
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"Don't worry about the moon. We set our laser to stun."
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"Smart."
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"We'll see the beam when it leaves. It won't be strong enough when it comes back..."
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"- ...to be seen by the naked eye. - Naked. Heh, heh, heh."
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"Right, funny."
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"So that device there will measure the photons that return..."
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"...and show it to us on this computer. Raj, get them some glasses."
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"Make it so."
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"There it is. There's the spike."
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"Two-point-five seconds for the light to return. That's the moon. We hit the moon."
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"That's your big experiment? All that for a line on the screen?"
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"Yeah, but think about what this represents."
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"The fact that we can do this is the only way of definitively proving..."
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"...that there are man-made objects on the moon..."
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"...had just invented the airplane."
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"What species is that?"
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"- Okay, guys, thank you. It's been fun. - Yeah, thanks."
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"He's must be very skilled at coitus."
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"...the only way to feel better about Penny going out with other guys..."
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"- Horse. - What?"
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"The phrase is "get back on the horse." Not whores."
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"That's disgusting, dude."
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