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Clips from The Simpsons - The Heartbroke Kid (S16E16)

"Stay strong, men!"
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"Medic!"
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"It's not my birthday, Seymour."
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"Everyone likes a gumball machine, so why not a gumbo machine?"
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"It's like a fundraising school bake sale with slang as the Saran Wrap!"
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"Look at these ingredients!"
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"Stairway!"
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"I'm getting the..."
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"Ooh, love, I love it so..."
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"Okay. We'll start with a routine stress test."
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"That's why I had the doctor install a zipper!"
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"I should've gone with the button-fly."
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"Look, you can see the booths from your window."
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"Drink your own weight in milkshakes and win a milkshake!"
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"I'd better tell Dad."
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"Thank you, Krusty."
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"eat my shorts, lame-o's!"
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"who are taking you to a maximum-security fat camp."
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"Even on the nose hurts."
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"tough luck."
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"Of course, this has never made sense."
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"All right, here's how this exercise works--"
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"I gorge on kettle corn during the sports and weather."
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"Your side-fat's starting to spill over to channel five and seven."
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"I hope you're getting three paychecks."
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"Jiminy Kimmel!"
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"I already use crayons for lipstick and fireplace soot for eyeliner."
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"Homer, maybe you could ask Mr. Burns for a raise."
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"I shouldn't call a sentence a story."
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"You're lucky this is just a youth hostel."
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"I don't see a dog living past 14 anyway, do you?"
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"with this belt-shirt combination?"
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"That's what the human race thinks of you."
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"Guten abend, my brave, Bavarian overlords."
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"Das is good."
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"Yo, I'm gonna cap a pop in your ass."
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"I'm ending your vending, Dog."
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"Bart, what are you doing here?"
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"But... you're still fat."
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"I've learned that even made-up corporate shills can lie to you."
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"Good one."
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"Folks, you have three weeks left on a non-refundable weight-loss treatment."
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"It's not "I.""
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"My goodness, no wonder you eat."
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"You're a catastrophe."
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"I've smelled it. It has to be eaten."
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"Somethin's comin', Sarge."
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"Somethin' big!"
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"The United States is due to win a war sometime."
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"Oh, good Lord, it's a Swingline!"
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"Skinner!"
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"Uh, yes, Superintendent Chalmers?"
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"Do you know what today is?"
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"Happy birthday to you, ha..."
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"You know I'm a Sagittarius."
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"Really? I'm a Libra."
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"There's a lot of compatibility there."
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"Skinner, be gay on your own time."
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"Today is the day we choose who gets the school's vending-machine contract."
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"I anticipate quite the-dog-and-pony show."
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"Sir, this school has a strict no-animal policy."
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"I assume these are hypothetical dogs and poni?"
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"Does your school nurse treat burns?"
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"Nope."
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"It couldn't be simpler!"
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"Kids write down what they want, put their money in the can,"
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"and I take the bus to the supermarket,"
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"and bring the snacks the next day."
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"Kids want a snack that skateboards,"
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"won't clean its room and hates homework."
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"That's why we created Scarf-ables by Scammer & Z-Dog!"
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"These two spokes-rebels were invented by the marketing team"
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"that came up with Hip-Hopsicles, the urban popsicle."
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"Yes. I saw those when my normal grocery store was on strike."
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"Well, here's what really seals the deal."
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"Slide your green into the machine and don't expect any change, dog!"
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"And a subsonic neuro-jammer disrupts the child's judgment center."
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"Fair enough."
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"I assume these snacks are nutritious?"
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"That's really none of our business."
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"The bottom line is, half the profits go to your school or camp."
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"You heard the lady."
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"Wow, Krishna Krisps, Amazonkers, Lollapalollipops."
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"These sound like my kind of snacks."
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"Oh, Dalai Lamanade!"
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"Oh, my God!"
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"Hydrogenated petroleum oil, monosodium poisonate, partially de-weaponized plutonium"?!"
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"Attention, duped masses!"
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"These new vending machine snacks are crammed"
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"with processed sugar, industrial byproducts and trans-fatty acids!"
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"Don't flava-hate, participate!"
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"The machine makes a good point."
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"Don't be a follower,"
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"be a snack swallower!"
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"It's fun to obey the machine!"
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"Way to go, dude!"
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"You're five cents away from an awesome beverage or snack."
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"I'm outta money!"
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"Willie, you wanna buy my skateboard?"
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"Why not?"
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"For once, it'll be all eyes on Willie!"
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"Look at me, I'm an American boy!"
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"No, I'm not!"
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"No! Ah! I spoke too soon!"
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"That's better."
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"What are you looking at, ya bastards!"
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"Bart, I spent all afternoon stuffing tuna fish into that steak."
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"Have some."
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"No, thanks."
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"The vending machines at school feed me now."
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"Oh, so I've been replaced by a machine?"
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"Marge, no machine could ever replace you."
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"Why, you're the..."
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"Or could it?"
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"Why did I give her a gun?"
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"But I repeat: No one is being replaced by a machine..."
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"until all the kinks are worked out."
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"Well, until that day, I'm still Bart's mother,"
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"and I don't like him stuffing himself with junk."
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"Oh, fine."
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