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Clips from Gilligan's Island - A Nose by Any Other Name (S01E01)

"Gilligan, boys and girls, it's all the same."
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"Yeah, but I have to powder and everything."
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"Alright, forget that I mentioned Julie Andrews's nose."
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"- But what about the others? - Sounds great."
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"Well, wonderful. Come on, Gilligan."
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"I think it's the right consistency now."
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"I've got this apron to keep him tidy."
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"- Very good ideas, Gilligan. - Skipper. What's that stuff?"
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"Gilligan, this is clay. We're gonna make an exact duplicate"
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"of your head, then we can try different noses on it."
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"Would you like a nose like mine? The Howell nose is special."
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"Doesn't look so special to me."
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"Not the looks, the nostrils. We smell money for ten miles."
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"Ginger and Mary Ann are making different noses so you'll have"
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"something to choose from. Ginger knows all the movie stars."
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"Mr. Howell, why don't you help instead of just standing?"
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"Alright. Oh, this is squishy."
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"I wonder, is this anything like-like making mud pies?"
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"Never made mud pies when you were a kid?"
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"Eh, no mother had the butler do it for me."
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"You sure missed a lot when you were young. Ha ha."
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"Had its advantage. He took my spankings too."
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"I wonder if Michelangelo got started this way."
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"(Gilligan) Hm. Skipper was right. It did dry fast."
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"I better go tell them it's ready to come off."
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"We've got enough clay for a dozen noses."
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"Unless we try for Jimmy Durante."
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"Ginger."
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"What is it?"
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"(Gilligan) Have you seen the Skipper?"
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"Ah!"
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"Wonder what scared them?"
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"What is it?"
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"Oh, it's still after us. Ah!"
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"[knocking on door]"
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"Come in. Ah!"
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"What's the matter with her?"
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"What's got into everybody?"
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"Ah!"
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"What's the matter with you running around"
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"frightening women the way you've been doing."
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"I'm sorry, Skipper, but I couldn't find myself."
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"Mr. Howell, if you'll help me, I think this is dry to remove."
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"Skipper, would you make a statue of me like this?"
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"Not just the head but the whole big adorable me."
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"Why certainly, Mr. Howell."
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"My gosh. I forgot to put a divider in this."
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"A divider?"
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"A cardboard piece down the middle"
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"to separate in two parts and take it off."
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"Take it easy now, little buddy. Take it easy."
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"It'll save your time combing your hair in the morning."
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"- Let me out of here. - Gilligan, just a moment."
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"Gilligan?"
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"Gilligan, are you alright?"
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"Yes. But make sure you stop when you get to the real meat."
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"Of course, little buddy"
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"You were right, Skipper. It looks just like me."
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"Your noses, sir."
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"'Ah.'"
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"Me with Richard Burton's nose."
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"Just think how close it's been to Elizabeth Taylor."
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"(Mrs. Howell) This is terribly exciting."
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"(Ginger) Reminds me of a part I played as a nurse."
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"That scene had a happy ending."
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"Maybe the same will happen to me."
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"- Everyone ready? - Yes."
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"- Yes. - Yes."
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"No."
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"Look, maybe if I bared you like Dr. Beth Casey, huh?"
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"(Mr. Howell) Well, if he's gonna look like Dr. Casey."
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"I'm gonna look like Dr. Zorba."
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"(Professor) Mr. Howell, will you please administer the anesthetic."
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"Mrs. Howell, you be the head nurse."
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"Ginger, Mary Ann, you assist Mrs. Howell."
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"(Skipper) What do I do, professor?"
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"'You got the medical book, Skipper.'"
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"You hold it up while I read the instructions."
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"[gasping]"
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"So whatever you do, don't skip two pages"
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"or this boy will be minus his appendix."
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"Maybe we'll wait till tomorrow. I think--"
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"(Professor) We're set. Mr. Howell, please administer the anesthetic."
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"Uh, you just breathe deep Gilligan, like this."
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"Take a nice deep breath of this a-and you.. Oh, my goodness."
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"I feel faint."
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"Thurston's always been very squeamish."
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"I remember he passed out when I had my ears pierced."
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"- You better attend to him. - Yeah."
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"You better attend to him, and we can take this all over tomorrow."
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"- Just relax, little buddy. - Perfectly alright."
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"Now Skipper, will you administer the anesthetic, please?"
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"Certainly."
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"Gilligan, count backwards from a 100."
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"100, 99, 98, 97, 96, 90, uh.."
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"- 95. - 95, 94, 93."
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"73, 72, 71."
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"- Scalpel. - Scalpel."
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"- Sponge. - Sponge."
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"65."
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"- My book. - The book."
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"[muttering indistinctly]"
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"[exhales]"
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"Hey, Skipper, what time is it?"
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"Gilligan."
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"It's a minute and a half later than the last time you asked me."
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"Skipper, you realize."
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"At 10 o'clock today, that'll be five days"
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"and the professor will take the bandage off."
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"I know."
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"Uh."
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"Skipper, what time is it?"
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"Let's get up and go see the Professor."
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"Maybe he'll give you an hour off for good behavior."
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"Yes."
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"- Can hardly wait. - Just hold still a minute."
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"(Gilligan) Hurry, hurry, hurry."
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"[all exclaim] Ah!"
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"- Beautiful. - Marvelous."
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"- Perfect. - Lemme see. Lemme see."
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