Loading...
Search
Search for Clips
Open main menu
Search for Clips
Home
About
Clips
Shows & Movies
You're not connected to the Internet. Please check your connection.
Clips from Seinfeld - The Pen (S03E03)
"- He's an idealist. - What are you looking for?"
Seinfeld
"- I'm looking. I like looking. - He likes looking."
Seinfeld
"- So look. - But how long can you look?"
Seinfeld
"I'm going for the record."
Seinfeld
"Your father wouldn't say so, but he's really glad you came."
Seinfeld
"- Oh, come on. - This is a big thing for him."
Seinfeld
"Outgoing president of the condo association."
Seinfeld
"- Remember Jack and Doris? - Nice to see you."
Seinfeld
"- Nice to meet you. Hello. - Hello."
Seinfeld
"- Pleased to meet you. - Hey, Jerry..."
Seinfeld
"...you came all the way down here for this?"
Seinfeld
"And scuba diving."
Seinfeld
"Scuba diving? Who's going scuba diving?"
Seinfeld
"We're going. We'll be back in time."
Seinfeld
"What do you have to go scuba diving for?"
Seinfeld
"- For fun. - For fun?"
Seinfeld
"Jack, have some sponge cake."
Seinfeld
"No. Thanks, no."
Seinfeld
"Jack is emceeing tomorrow."
Seinfeld
"- He's in charge of the whole thing. - So, Jerry, your mother tells me..."
Seinfeld
"- I don't think so. - No?"
Seinfeld
"Listen, Morty, you want to settle up for last night?"
Seinfeld
"All right. I owe you $19.45."
Seinfeld
"What did you have? You had the minute steak."
Seinfeld
"- Yeah. - Did you have a Coke or what?"
Seinfeld
"I did not have a Coke."
Seinfeld
"Somebody had a Coke."
Seinfeld
"- I had a Coke. - Oh, and I had the scampi."
Seinfeld
"So, that's $17.10, and the tax and the tip."
Seinfeld
"All right, make it 20 bucks."
Seinfeld
"It's $19.45, Morty."
Seinfeld
"$19.45?"
Seinfeld
"See, you know your father."
Seinfeld
"You got to get it right to the penny."
Seinfeld
"- This pen? - Yeah."
Seinfeld
"Oh, this is an astronaut pen."
Seinfeld
"It writes upside down. They use this in space."
Seinfeld
"- It was a gift. - Because a lot of times I write in bed..."
Seinfeld
"...and I have to turn and lean on my elbow to make the pen work."
Seinfeld
"- Take the pen. - Oh, no."
Seinfeld
"- Go ahead. - I couldn't."
Seinfeld
"- Take it. - I can't take it."
Seinfeld
"- Do me a personal favour. - No, I'm not comfortable."
Seinfeld
"- I cannot take it. - Take the pen."
Seinfeld
"Okay, thank you very much. Thank you. Gee, boy."
Seinfeld
"- Jack, what are you doing? - Stop it."
Seinfeld
"Jack, we should go."
Seinfeld
"It was nice meeting you."
Seinfeld
"- Nice to meet you. - Thanks again."
Seinfeld
"Come on!"
Seinfeld
"She's adorable."
Seinfeld
"What did you take his pen for?"
Seinfeld
"- He gave it to me. - But you didn't have to take it."
Seinfeld
"She's gotta make a big deal out of everything."
Seinfeld
"- He offered it to me. - Because you made such a big fuss."
Seinfeld
"Well, I liked it. Should I have said I didn't like it?"
Seinfeld
"He could have said, Thank you, and put it back in his pocket."
Seinfeld
"- He loves that pen. - Come on."
Seinfeld
"He talks about it all the time. He goes on and on..."
Seinfeld
"...about how it writes upside down, how astronauts use it."
Seinfeld
"He never should have offered it."
Seinfeld
"I know his wife. She has some mouth on her."
Seinfeld
"She'll tell everyone in the condo now that you made him give you the pen."
Seinfeld
"They're talking about it right now."
Seinfeld
"- So you want me to return it? - Yes."
Seinfeld
"He's not gonna return that pen. That's ridiculous."
Seinfeld
"I don't even want the pen now."
Seinfeld
"Jack can afford to give away a pen with all his money, believe me."
Seinfeld
"He gives me a check for $19.45."
Seinfeld
"He didn't have a Coke."
Seinfeld
"Here, let me see it."
Seinfeld
"- Hey, it writes upside down. - Yeah."
Seinfeld
"You okay in here?"
Seinfeld
"Why is it so hot in here?"
Seinfeld
"It's only for three days."
Seinfeld
"Today's over. Then we have tomorrow."
Seinfeld
"We leave on Sunday. It's one day, really."
Seinfeld
"What is with this bar?"
Seinfeld
"It's right in my back. It's killing me."
Seinfeld
"You wanna switch? I'm on a love seat."
Seinfeld
"I got my feet up in the air like I'm in a space capsule."
Seinfeld
"I am never gonna fall asleep."
Seinfeld
"They're nuts with temperature."
Seinfeld
"This bar is right in my back."
Seinfeld
"How about that guy writing a check for $19.45?"
Seinfeld
"I'm sweating here."
Seinfeld
"It's one day."
Seinfeld
"Half a day, really."
Seinfeld
"I mean, you subtract showers and meals, it's like 20 minutes."
Seinfeld
"Stay on 95 South to Biscayne Boulevard."
Seinfeld
"Then you make a left turn."
Seinfeld
"Then you're gonna merge over very quickly, but stay on Biscayne."
Seinfeld
"Don't get off Biscayne, you understand me?"
Seinfeld
"Stay on Biscayne."
Seinfeld
"You're going underwater?"
Seinfeld
"Yes, generally, that's where scuba diving is done."
Seinfeld
"What do you have to go for? What's down there that's so special?"
Seinfeld
"What's so special up here?"
Seinfeld
"What's the matter?"
Seinfeld
"- My back. - What happened?"
Seinfeld
"That- That bed."
Seinfeld
"The bar was right in my back."
Seinfeld
"I told you to let us sleep in there."
Seinfeld
"Then you would be hunched over."
Seinfeld
"I don't even know if I can go scuba diving."
Seinfeld
"- You can't go? - So stay home."
Seinfeld
"- You can go. - Without you?"
Seinfeld
"That's the reason you came down."
Seinfeld
"- Don't go. - You sure?"
Seinfeld
"Maybe you should see a doctor."
Seinfeld
"- We'll stay in a hotel tonight. - No, we'll stay in there."
Seinfeld
"Why don't you get a new sofa?"
Seinfeld
"Nobody uses it."
Seinfeld
"Jerry, don't talk crazy."
Seinfeld
"Mrs. Seinfeld, please..."
Seinfeld
"...I am begging you:"
Seinfeld
"Put the air conditioner on."
Seinfeld
"I don't even know how to work it."
Seinfeld
"I keep telling her it's like an oven in here."
Seinfeld
"Is everybody up?"
Seinfeld
Show more clips
« Previous
Next »
Showing
121
to
240
of
443
results
1
2
3
4