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Clips from American Dad! - Family Affair (S04E04)

"Which one is yours?"
American Dad!
"Oh, you think you're the first family that's put me on its plan?"
American Dad!
"Ah, yes-The DuBonnets."
American Dad!
"It's ringing. [Imitates Phone]"
American Dad!
"[Speaking French]"
American Dad!
"- Stop that! - I'll send for my things."
American Dad!
"Four Guatemalans will be here Thursday morning..."
American Dad!
"at 7:00 with boxes and packing tape."
American Dad!
"Under no circumstances are you to feed them or tip them."
American Dad!
"[Door Slams]"
American Dad!
"- Haven't heard from Roger in days. - Who cares?"
American Dad!
"What bums me out is that you traded SaintJames for Marvin Gardens."
American Dad!
"If I role a four through a seven, I have to give that asshole all my money."
American Dad!
"Ah, good. You're all here together. Now again, about the tickets-"
American Dad!
"Just so you know, I've got people on the Craigslist..."
American Dad!
"who are willing to pay over face."
American Dad!
"You take your time."
American Dad!
"And if you've never been to a concert with me..."
American Dad!
"you are in for a treat."
American Dad!
"I yell constantly."
American Dad!
"- [Ringing] - Hello?"
American Dad!
"Yes. Oh, my God."
American Dad!
"I thought it was my father's birthday again."
American Dad!
"Now, who is this, and why are you calling? Oh, my God!"
American Dad!
"[Groaning]"
American Dad!
"You were his emergency contact."
American Dad!
"- We didn't know what else to do. - What happened to him?"
American Dad!
"Well, take a look at this security video."
American Dad!
"He arrives with this family at 9:00 a.m."
American Dad!
"Churros, elephant ears- The whole nine yards."
American Dad!
"which he rode 16 times, all with different families."
American Dad!
"slumped over a teacup, and urinating on a pinwheel."
American Dad!
"You're here for me- after all I've put you through."
American Dad!
"You're an addict, Roger..."
American Dad!
"but luckily, we found someone who can help."
American Dad!
"And what's upstairs from there?"
American Dad!
"- I think an S.A.T. Preparation class. - All right. I'll go."
American Dad!
"Roger, why don't you tell everyone..."
American Dad!
"what your expectations are for group therapy?"
American Dad!
"and then they abandoned me years ago..."
American Dad!
"Thank you, Doctor. You are a miracle worker."
American Dad!
"You see that, people? That's how you share."
American Dad!
"Oh, my God, there it is- The Logan house."
American Dad!
"I haven't been back here for 17 years..."
American Dad!
"ever since we took that family road trip to Montana."
American Dad!
"When we stopped for gas, everybody had a chore."
American Dad!
"Mine was to get Doritos. Cool Ranch hadjust come out."
American Dad!
"It was- [Sighs] What a summer."
American Dad!
"No, Roger. You have to confront them."
American Dad!
"It's important to face your fears."
American Dad!
"You know, there was a time when I was terrified of an uncircumcised penis-"
American Dad!
"So I moved to Brussels and hunkered down in a gym locker room..."
American Dad!
"for six long days."
American Dad!
"You're right. I've got to get past this."
American Dad!
"These khakis are tight on me."
American Dad!
"[Doorbell Rings]"
American Dad!
"- Charles? - Oh, my God."
American Dad!
"You hurt me. You hurt me bad."
American Dad!
"You made it impossible for me to have healthy relationships with other families."
American Dad!
"- I paid you in laughter. - We were afraid of you."
American Dad!
"Well, you know what? You missed out."
American Dad!
"These people, the Smiths-"
American Dad!
"- What's going on? - Oh, look. It's Tyler..."
American Dad!
"all grown up like a big shot."
American Dad!
"[Chuckles] Damn it."
American Dad!
"Oh, boy. These khakis are not getting any looser."
American Dad!
"My phone that you can't personalize the ring on..."
American Dad!
"- [Clicks] - [Gasps] 11:00 a. M?"
American Dad!
"But that- that-that-that can't be."
American Dad!
"I went to bed at 6:00 last night just for a little catnap..."
American Dad!
"L- l-"
American Dad!
"I slept for 17 hours?"
American Dad!
"Oh, that game is so scary!"
American Dad!
"Oh, you really think you're gonna die when he tags you."
American Dad!
"Then when you realize you're still alive, it makes you laugh."
American Dad!
"You went? Why did nobody wake me?"
American Dad!
"- What? - It was the perfect family night."
American Dad!
"Hey, girl."
American Dad!
"- What? - Easy, baby."
American Dad!
"I'm just a squirrel trying to get a nut."
American Dad!
"Except I'm a koala."
American Dad!
"# The weather was changing He looked like a slob #"
American Dad!
"# They put the helmet on tight #"
American Dad!
"[Woman] #Reginald, And he used to be nothin'#"
American Dad!
"# Now he's a koala And he's cute as a button #"
American Dad!
"But my number one duty is to say howdy doody to your fruity."
American Dad!
"Oh, no. No. You will not be attending this abortion."
American Dad!
"P.S., I'm the second lead, and I'm starving."
American Dad!
"You've defiled my moment, Son- Right in front of my wife."
American Dad!
"The concert of the century is upon us."
American Dad!
"- Oh, sorry, guys. I have to miss game night. - What?"
American Dad!
"- Yeah, we'll surprise him. - Yes. I'm in agreement."
American Dad!
"Hands, please."
American Dad!
"I love to sweep. It's my passion."
American Dad!
"She says she's running late, and she'll be at Pizza Overlord in 30 minutes."
American Dad!
"- What a great idea. - Sure, why not?"
American Dad!
"In three, two-"
American Dad!
"Stan, you didn't say one single word on the way home."
American Dad!
"I wanted to introduce you to the actors from my play. That's who I was sitting with."
American Dad!
"Actors? Then why were you taking a family photo with them?"
American Dad!
"We then traded a few hilarious stories about Eritrean soccer."
American Dad!
"I'm bleeding."
American Dad!
"It stopped. Hi."
American Dad!
"Roger? How did you get in? We changed the locks."
American Dad!
"Hey, Roger, we're heading out to dinner. Want to come?"
American Dad!
"- Hey, Tony! - Roger, that man is talking to you."
American Dad!
"- Why would you say that? - Tony. Tony!"
American Dad!
"You know what? That wasn't cool of me to pressure you."
American Dad!
"[Phone Ringing]"
American Dad!
"eating a caramel apple, watching an animatronic bear play the fiddle."
American Dad!
"the rights to which I doubt he owns-"
American Dad!
"You make me sick."
American Dad!
"But when I got back to the pumps, they were gone."
American Dad!
"Brad, Jenny."
American Dad!
"You rented a room from us and refused to pay."
American Dad!
"Jenny, you better shut up right now, or I will cut your face."
American Dad!
"- [Roger] Marco. - [Smiths] Polo."
American Dad!
"- Marco. - Polo. - Polo."
American Dad!
"Well, isn't there a saying about not waking a sleeping fish?"
American Dad!
"# On the surface, it looked like a hell of a deal #"
American Dad!
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