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Clips from The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel - Because You Left (S01E01)

"including obstruction of pedestrian traffic."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"- Rapist. - Confidence trickster."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"Who are you, Charles Dickens?"
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"He is not a rapist."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"I'm going with con man."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"Or arsonist."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"- Oh, great. - Yes, thank you."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"Next case."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"Miriam Maisel,"
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"charged with 1140A of the penal law."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"Uh, who is presiding as the prosecutor?"
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"Leon Cranmer, on behalf of the People, Judge."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"Good morning, Your Honor, Michael Kessler."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"Your Honor, Mrs. Maisel is as she appears before you:"
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"A list that would include the venerable Rabbi Wasserman"
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"of Temple Shearith Israel."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"there is no way this activity would recur."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"that Mrs. Maisel is an honorable, respectable woman,"
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"So I'm curious as to why he didn't take the morning off"
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"to help you deal with this."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"to use up any more of your valuable time, Your Honor."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"- Lewd. - Well, I..."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"Effectively, this was entrapment."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"but I would like to point out that no other witness"
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"Would you agree to that?"
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"your lack of prior arrests."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"Thank you?"
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"- Too bad. - Shirley Temple, Your Honor?"
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"It's a coffee house, it's just coffee, there's no booze."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"Jim Crow laws, voter fraud,"
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"you're taking the time to pick on a "little lady"?"
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"Ethel and Julius Rosenberg were framed!"
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"Contempt of court fine is $200. Cash."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"Have you seen the bathroom? I'm not using that bathroom."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"Then you're staying here."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"Hello."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"- Joel. - Midge?"
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"Y-You call me up out of the blue asking for money,"
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"It's crazy, I'm having a heart attack here."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"* I somehow can't believe *"
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"* I'm curious as to just exactly what is up your sleeve... *"
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"My God, Abe, I've been trying to get you out of tweeds"
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"since Hector was a pup."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"It was a terrible night. I'm sorry it took that turn."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"Serious face. Easter Island face."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"I know that face."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"about taking back the apartment? - Nope. No way."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"What do you mean, you'll pay for half?"
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"Then, we keep it available"
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"Yes."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"Like we did the temple seats."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"And you can swing that? Place ain't cheap."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"- I can swing it. - You can swing for that,"
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"You know..."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"I never thought you liked me so much."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"No. I like you very much, Moishe."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"Shirley never sees enough of Rosie."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"- That we should fix... - And maybe it's me,"
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"but you always seemed to have a weird attitude"
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"whenever I brought up the 13."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"The 13 people I got out of Germany in '43..."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"Thank you, Moishe."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"No. - Hey, wait a minute, wait, here we go."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"All right. Now, that's very nice of you,"
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"Now we just have to figure out"
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"- Oh, Joel will come back. - What do you mean?"
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"I see that you've posted payment on your fine,"
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"Could you speak up, please?"
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"My behavior earlier today"
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"I let my emotions get the better of me."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"but in view of what happened here today, I offer this:"
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"plead guilty, and you'll be sentenced to time served."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"and up to three months in jail."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"please think long and hard"
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"and about how easy it would be to make me angry again."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"and she is sentenced to time served."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"Thank you, Your Honor."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"that is a lovely dress you are wearing."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"Oh, God, I'm gonna be so late for Ethan."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"Hey, get this: the horse fucker was a flasher, so I was close."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"- Tell me it's gonna work. - What?"
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"No, I mean, it really has to work."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"I have got a plan. It is long term,"
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"that Dow Chemical always slows down around the holidays."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"Don, you're going to Jersey."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"Seniority counts for something, Donny."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"Just don't get too drunk."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"I'm not gonna be on your couch forever."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"You're like the pet we never had."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"It's Penny on the line, again."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"Uh, Gene Ammons is Jewish."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"The Navy is goyish."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"The Marine Corps is goyish."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"The Air Force is Jewish."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"Kool-Aid, goyish."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"Instant potatoes, scary goyish."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"There was a thing in Life magazine,"
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"And it's-it's, uh..."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"Bob B-Y-H-R-E."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"In fact, I heard he was thinking about packing it in"
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"after hearing them. Isn't that right, guys?"
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"and don't fake it like you did for me"
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"or like your wives do for you."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"Lindsey Trent and the Hot Three."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"You actually made it."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"Oh, mine, too."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"Nah, you were just missing notes during the set."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"Yeah, but it's jazz."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"Who can tell when you're missing the notes?"
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"- What? - Spitting, yeah."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"Yeah."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"Shit."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"Well, much respect, Duchess."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"Yeah, six months and counting."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"He can hold drumsticks."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"He can hold a radial tire."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"Not if you can help it."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"Excellent."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"I'm trying to figure out how I feel."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
"I noticed."
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
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