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Clips from Brooklyn Nine-Nine - Halloween II (S02E02)

This year, that won't be a problem

"This year, that won't be a problem"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Joan of Arc? Rod Stewart? Martha Stewart?

"Joan of Arc? Rod Stewart? Martha Stewart?"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Oh, my gosh, that's what it is.

"Oh, my gosh, that's what it is."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

It's Halloween. Just say it's Halloween. It's Halloween.

"It's Halloween. Just say it's Halloween. It's Halloween."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Let's say, what? I'll steal the watch right off your wrist.

"Let's say, what? I'll steal the watch right off your wrist."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

just so you might call me an amazing captain/genius.

"just so you might call me an amazing captain/genius."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Got his attention. He's coming back to me.

"Got his attention. He's coming back to me."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

and instead not do that?

"and instead not do that?"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Okay. No problem. Just come back and help us when you're done.

"Okay. No problem. Just come back and help us when you're done."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

She's already checked herself out in every reflective surface around the precinct.

"She's already checked herself out in every reflective surface around the precinct."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Yeah! Suck it.

"Yeah! Suck it."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Nope. Deuce. It's like Ace but twice as cool.

"Nope. Deuce. It's like Ace but twice as cool."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Now because of last year, the Captain will suspect that you are all helping me,

"Now because of last year, the Captain will suspect that you are all helping me,"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

the actual theft will be pulled off

"the actual theft will be pulled off"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Jake, if he's been arrested before, how do you know he's any good?

"Jake, if he's been arrested before, how do you know he's any good?"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Perhaps this will answer your question. Fingers!

"Perhaps this will answer your question. Fingers!"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

But where's the smoked turkey?

"But where's the smoked turkey?"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

I was wondering, per chance,

"I was wondering, per chance,"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Now, Hammer. It's time! It's Hammer time!

"Now, Hammer. It's time! It's Hammer time!"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

I love life.

"I love life."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

And now, the Jake and bake.

"And now, the Jake and bake."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

I just wanted somebody to check my son's candy.

"I just wanted somebody to check my son's candy."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Please, let me help you up.

"Please, let me help you up."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

I believe a tall, nimble fingered man named McCreary left a package for me.

"I believe a tall, nimble fingered man named McCreary left a package for me."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Ooh! I'm going to make a movie of you receiving the watch.

"Ooh! I'm going to make a movie of you receiving the watch."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Here...

"Here..."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Don't touch my face.

"Don't touch my face."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Not now, Charles.

"Not now, Charles."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

make urines in de toilet.

"make urines in de toilet."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Sure, or we can press fast forward and I can watch you talk like a chipmunk.

"Sure, or we can press fast forward and I can watch you talk like a chipmunk."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Boyle,

"Boyle,"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Okay.

"Okay."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

$120

"$120"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

and my lucky $2 bill that I found on my first day of kindergarten.

"and my lucky $2 bill that I found on my first day of kindergarten."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

What? What are you talking about?

"What? What are you talking about?"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

but even for a criminal, your customer service has been abysmal.

"but even for a criminal, your customer service has been abysmal."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Jake, you parked in front of a hydrant.

"Jake, you parked in front of a hydrant."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Stupid fire department! We gotta think of a way to catch up with that truck.

"Stupid fire department! We gotta think of a way to catch up with that truck."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Go! We're doing it, Boyle.

"Go! We're doing it, Boyle."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

We're Tokyo drifting!

"We're Tokyo drifting!"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Jake, where are you?

"Jake, where are you?"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Get off!

"Get off!"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

NYPD.

"NYPD."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Well, gotta do something for 16 blocks.

"Well, gotta do something for 16 blocks."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

"I didn't want you to know because it's so off brand for me but,"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

The world just lost an angel.

"The world just lost an angel."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

"Got a badge?"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

No. Please. Don't shut the window. Don't shut the window.

"No. Please. Don't shut the window. Don't shut the window."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

I can still win.

"I can still win."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Oh, my God.

"Oh, my God."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

No, I made a switch. That's a fake.

"No, I made a switch. That's a fake."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

You were behind all this?

"You were behind all this?"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

I began by creating a word cloud.

"I began by creating a word cloud."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

I was going to try and steal your watch?

"I was going to try and steal your watch?"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

You're three minutes early

"You're three minutes early"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

He can take anything off of anyone.

"He can take anything off of anyone."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Anything?

"Anything?"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

While you met with McCreary,

"While you met with McCreary,"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Jake, party bus!

"Jake, party bus!"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

I knew Boyle would never knowingly betray me.

"I knew Boyle would never knowingly betray me."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

You sick son of a bitch.

"You sick son of a bitch."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Now get your game face on, Sarge.

"Now get your game face on, Sarge."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

If you forget your moves, just rip your cape off

"If you forget your moves, just rip your cape off"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Mr. And Mrs. Terry Jeffords.

"Mr. And Mrs. Terry Jeffords."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

The watch never left my person.

"The watch never left my person."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Duh, duh, duh

"Duh, duh, duh"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

I can see that you're enjoying this.

"I can see that you're enjoying this."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Not nearly as much as I enjoyed phase two.

"Not nearly as much as I enjoyed phase two."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Phase two!

"Phase two!"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Santiago placed a fire hydrant in front of your car,

"Santiago placed a fire hydrant in front of your car,"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

which she then towed away.

"which she then towed away."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Next, I had to take Charles out of the equation.

"Next, I had to take Charles out of the equation."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

and he would do anything to help you.

"and he would do anything to help you."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Enter a parade of drunks

"Enter a parade of drunks"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

that separated the two of you

"that separated the two of you"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

long enough for Terry to kidnap Charles.

"long enough for Terry to kidnap Charles."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Then, two bears

"Then, two bears"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

spilled their drinks on you and stole your wallet.

"spilled their drinks on you and stole your wallet."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Those bears?

"Those bears?"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Scully

"Scully"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

and Hitchcock.

"and Hitchcock."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

I can't pull my head off!

"I can't pull my head off!"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

If Terry kidnapped Charles,

"If Terry kidnapped Charles,"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

how did Charles tell me to get on the party bus?

"how did Charles tell me to get on the party bus?"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Eight months ago at a morning briefing,

"Eight months ago at a morning briefing,"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

I told the squad

"I told the squad"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

that a group of thieves was targeting party buses

"that a group of thieves was targeting party buses"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

so I could record Charles saying...

"so I could record Charles saying..."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Toot toot! Get on board!

"Toot toot! Get on board!"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

With your jacket and shoes gone, you didn't look like a cop,

"With your jacket and shoes gone, you didn't look like a cop,"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

but you still had your badge.

"but you still had your badge."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

That is, until you entered

"That is, until you entered"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

the party bus.

"the party bus."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Rosa's feline dancing distracted you as a mysterious partier stole your badge on...

"Rosa's feline dancing distracted you as a mysterious partier stole your badge on..."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Halloween!

"Halloween!"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

It was you in the mask, you sly son of a bitch.

"It was you in the mask, you sly son of a bitch."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Well done.

"Well done."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

But I do have to ask.

"But I do have to ask."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Those guys at the impound,

"Those guys at the impound,"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

did they really smash my car?

"did they really smash my car?"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

No, in fact, I had them wash it.

"No, in fact, I had them wash it."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Good one, Captain. You can't wash a car.

"Good one, Captain. You can't wash a car."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

So how'd you convince the whole squad to betray me?

"So how'd you convince the whole squad to betray me?"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

What'd you offer them?

"What'd you offer them?"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

I asked them if they wanted to embarrass you and they instantly said yes.

"I asked them if they wanted to embarrass you and they instantly said yes."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

I'm not going to lie. That turns me on a little bit.

"I'm not going to lie. That turns me on a little bit."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Mmm.

"Mmm."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

So,

"So,"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

in addition to the five weeks of free overtime,

"in addition to the five weeks of free overtime,"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

I believe I'm owed one more thing.

"I believe I'm owed one more thing."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Yes.

"Yes."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Here we go. One second.

"Here we go. One second."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Very well.

"Very well."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Captain Raymond Holt,

"Captain Raymond Holt,"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

you are an amazing police captain/genius.

"you are an amazing police captain/genius."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

But be warned,

"But be warned,"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

I started planning next year's heist just this minute.

"I started planning next year's heist just this minute."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Good.

"Good."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Then you're only three months behind.

"Then you're only three months behind."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Hey, don't look so sad.

"Hey, don't look so sad."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

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