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Clips from Glee - Puppet Master (S05E05)

"And do you realize in my short time as acting principal,"
Glee
"test scores have risen 42%."
Glee
"And my new caning policy has dropped both absences and tardiness down to zero."
Glee
"So, the truth is you should be cleaning floors and I should be running schools."
Glee
"and feeding your family, I suggest you do"
Glee
"everything you can to make sure this place looks just amazing"
Glee
"for this evaluation."
Glee
"They're in your office, Coach."
Glee
"One last question before we come back"
Glee
"for the official evaluation later in the week."
Glee
"Why do you want to be a principal?"
Glee
"Now, I know everyone wants to wear the crown, but the fantasy of it"
Glee
"can be quite different from the reality."
Glee
"Well, more than anyone I have ever met, I was born to be in charge."
Glee
"Test scores are up."
Glee
"Kids are showing up."
Glee
"Our sports teams are winning."
Glee
"Heck, even the Glee Club is back competing"
Glee
"for the national title of clubs no one really cares about."
Glee
"And all of this is happening because I can finally manifest my vision"
Glee
"without having to clear it with some fool."
Glee
"You give me this school, and in one year"
Glee
"it will be the top school in the state."
Glee
"I guarantee it."
Glee
"I'm a champion, gentlemen."
Glee
"Let me be your champion."
Glee
"We'll be back in a week."
Glee
"But between you and me, barring a total catastrophe, you have my vote."
Glee
"You certainly have a lot of trophies, Principal Sylvester."
Glee
"Well, Superintendent Harris, you're new in town, you may not be aware,"
Glee
"but I am the only seven-time national champion cheerleading coach"
Glee
"in the country."
Glee
"Hmm, my wife used to watch those competitions on television."
Glee
"Mm-hmm. Bugged the crap out of me if I'm gonna be totally honest."
Glee
"Mmm."
Glee
"- We're divorced. - Oh."
Glee
"Are you married?"
Glee
"No, no."
Glee
"I married myself once, but I don't think it was legal."
Glee
"Yeah."
Glee
"Oh, are you sure that's appropriate, Bob?"
Glee
"I don't think anyone would see a couple of guys going out"
Glee
"for a beer as anything shady."
Glee
"I'd like to find some great dudes to hang out with."
Glee
"I-I'll call your office, okay?"
Glee
"I don't look masculine, do I, Becky?"
Glee
"You have an allure that goes beyond gender."
Glee
"That's what I always say."
Glee
"I have to admit, while I find his hairline highly suspicious for a man his age,"
Glee
"that Bob Harris thinks I could star in the sequel to Boys Don't Cry,"
Glee
"honestly, it kind of bums me out."
Glee
"Maybe it's your clothes."
Glee
"You could try on a skirt every now and then."
Glee
"No, you don't understand the era I grew up in."
Glee
"I became a teacher almost 30 years ago."
Glee
"It was 1986."
Glee
"It was a different time."
Glee
"I tried being girly."
Glee
"But I found it hard to get the respect I felt I deserved."
Glee
"Boys, no video games in school."
Glee
"Who are you supposed to be?"
Glee
"I'm the new cheerleading coach."
Glee
"Get to class, mates."
Glee
"I've been trying to sound like Crocodile Dundee."
Glee
"Word of advice new Cheerios! Coach, Sue Sylvester."
Glee
"Try some pants."
Glee
"Get to class!"
Glee
"That new cheerleading coach is one scary dude."
Glee
"The moment I put that track suit on, the world bowed before me."
Glee
"I had one made in every color."
Glee
"Maybe it's time for a change, Coach."
Glee
"Everybody is scared of you now."
Glee
"It can't hurt to girl it up a bit."
Glee
"You're early."
Glee
"Geez! Oh, Brad! You scared the crap out of me!"
Glee
"Warn me before you talk!"
Glee
"I'm sorry, man. I'm having a bad week."
Glee
"Tell me about it. I can't stop playing online blackjack."
Glee
"I owe thousands of dollars to some very sketchy people."
Glee
"I'm in 23 clubs!"
Glee
"I probably would've been prom king if this school didn't have so many stoners."
Glee
"And what's wrong with having a solid game plan?"
Glee
"My house is getting foreclosed on."
Glee
"And get this, my fiancé called me a "Puppet Master!""
Glee
"Well, if "pulling strings""
Glee
"means that I encourage people to reach their fullest potential,"
Glee
"then, hell yeah, guilty as charged!"
Glee
"Brad, if everyone just wants me to sit down and shut up..."
Glee
"that's exactly what I'm gonna do."
Glee
"I'm gonna be right back here in the back corner."
Glee
"Believe me, that'll send a message..."
Glee
"Blainey Days!"
Glee
"We're sorry we didn't listen to you earlier."
Glee
"Yeah, dawg. Our bad, yo!"
Glee
"I'd love to say something really bitchy or even downright cruel, but I can't,"
Glee
"because you're clearly the most talented teenager at this school!"
Glee
"On this planet! Yeah, that's why we're best friends, even though"
Glee
"I'm straight and you're gay and I'm blond and you're gay."
Glee
"May the Force be with you."
Glee
"Kids, I've got an awesome idea!"
Glee
"This week's lesson is all about the most inspiring guy we know: Blaine!"
Glee
"Ooh, child, Unique's got the blues!"
Glee
"And the only way to cure 'em"
Glee
"is to hear Blaine's smooth-as-a-baby's-butt voice!"
Glee
"Please, Blaine!"
Glee
"Please? Please?"
Glee
"Yeah, Blaine!"
Glee
"Really?"
Glee
"Well, if you guys insist. What should I sing?"
Glee
"Oh, I know. Hit it!"
Glee
"♪ Ooh, you make me live ♪ Whatever this world can give to me ♪"
Glee
"♪ It's you, you're all I see ♪ Ooh, you make me live now, honey ♪"
Glee
"♪ Ooh, you make me live ♪"
Glee
"♪ Oh, you're the best friend that I ever had ♪"
Glee
"♪ I've been with you such a long time ♪"
Glee
"♪ You're my sunshine, and I want you to know ♪"
Glee
"♪ That my feelings are true ♪ I really love you"
Glee
"♪ Oh, you're my best friend. ♪"
Glee
"♪ Ooh, you make me live! ♪"
Glee
"♪ Ooh, I've been wandering around back to you ♪"
Glee
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