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Clips from Gilligan's Island - Physical Fatness (S01E01)

"There aren't any red cabs. There's only Gilligan."
Gilligan's Island
"Oh, yes, of course, Gilligan. White cab. White cab."
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"Gilligan, would you mind helping us with these bags?"
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"- Certainly, Mr. Howell. - Be careful of the large one."
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"There's something frightfully expensive in it."
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"- Money. - I'll be very careful."
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"Watch it, that's my luggage. Watch it, boy."
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"- Here, here. There you go. - Oh, poor Gilligan."
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"No. He's a hardy fellow."
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"- Whoop! I...Mr. Howell? - Yes, what is it?"
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"- Can I ask you something? - Certainly."
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"- You folks going on a trip? - A trip? Don't be silly."
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"We're being rescued."
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"Really, Gilligan, you told us that the professor was"
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"working on a scheme to get us off the island."
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"Surely we haven't been ship wrecked before we even start."
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"The professor is still experimenting."
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"- He has to find more chemicals. - Chemicals?"
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"'Yeah. He mixes the shiny junk with some other stuff.'"
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"Once it's all squishy, he adds some more goop."
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"Then he heats it and pours one mess into another"
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"and then he.. Am I being too technical for you?"
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"- Professor? - Huh?"
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"Don't let me interrupt. I just wanted to use your scale."
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"Help yourself, Skipper."
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"I just think it's near genius"
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"the way you figured to make this dye marker."
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"No, just lucky to find the chemicals."
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"Afraid you're getting a little overweight?"
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"No. But you know, a fellow likes to keep in shape."
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"'By the way, that scale only goes to 200 pounds.'"
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"Thanks."
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"Skipper, I cleaned up the other scale. A big one by the fire."
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"Gilligan, we use that to weigh the fish."
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"If you don't mind, I'll use the professor's scale."
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"Now, it's in here somewhere."
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"This Navy manual will tell me how much I should weigh."
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"Maybe it's under tonnage."
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"Eh...here we are."
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"There. Six foot three."
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"Says I should weigh 199 pounds."
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"- But that scale only goes up-- - I know, only 200 pounds."
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"Therefore I have nothing to worry about."
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"Gilligan."
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"[sighs]"
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"Ah, ah!"
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"- Ah, ah! - Tail."
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"Okay, Skipper, it's all set. Have a seat."
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"Do you think that will hold me, Gilligan?"
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"Come on. We've weighed bigger fish than you."
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"O-op."
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"Alright. Step aside."
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"[creaking]"
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"- Wow! - What does it say?"
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"Never mind that, Gilligan. How much do I weigh?"
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"'Two hundred and twenty one pounds.'"
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"Skipper, you'll never get in the Navy."
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"You gotta lose 22 pounds!"
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"- Skipper's gotta go on a diet. - Yeah!"
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"I'll need a special raft to release the marker out at sea."
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"- You design it. I'll build it. - He needs exercise."
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"- My little buddy said that. - I'll be finished in a week."
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"Hear that? In a week, we'll be rescued."
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"in less than a week if we wanna join the Navy."
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"You'll have to go on a crash diet."
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"Exactly. This is what you must do to help me."
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"Anytime, no matter what I do or say"
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"don't let me have anything to eat. You understand? Nothing!"
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"Depend on me, Skipper."
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"[bell ringing]"
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"Time for dinner. Come on, let's go."
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"(Gilligan) That's Ginger's. Pass it down."
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"- Pardon me, Ginger. - Thanks."
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"That's Mary Ann's. Pass it down."
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"Here's yours, Skipper."
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"Oh, now, wait a minute. Didn't you forget something?"
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"There's only a measly piece of lettuce on the plate."
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"Oh, yeah. Your spoon."
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"It's enough food for an overgrown man."
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"Alright. If you will all excuse me"
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"I'll go read, to take my mind off the food."
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"- Hey, Skipper? - Yes."
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"Don't go too far. It's your turn to wash the dishes."
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"Well...there's one dish I won't have to wash."
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"- Goodnight. Sleep tight. - Sleep tight?"
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"It's alright for you to say that 'cause you're not starving."
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"Just forget about it and go to sleep."
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"I've tried to go to sleep. I've tried counting sheep."
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"But they all turn into lamb chops. Boy, I'm hungry."
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"We gotta get your mind off food. Let's talk about being rescued."
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"Good idea."
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"Luckily, we've got the professor. He's a smart cookie."
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"- Cookie? - I mean, he knows his onions."
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"If you don't shut up, I'm gonna bend you like a pretzel!"
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"Now, see what you've done. You've got me doin' it to me!"
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"I'm sorry. Every time I try to help, I end up a dead duck."
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"[Gilligan snoring]"
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"[snoring continues]"
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"Ah, ah, uh-huh, ah!"
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"Gilligan?"
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"Gilligan?"
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"Are you asleep?"
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"And now for a nice midnight snack."
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"Ah, ah, uh-huh, ah!"
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"- We work good together, huh? - Yeah."
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"Once rescued, we'll do the same thing in the Navy."
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"Not exactly, Gilligan."
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"See, we won't be working on rafts in the Navy."
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"They've got rafts where you push a button"
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"and the whole thing blows up like a big balloon."
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"Speakin' of big balloons, it's time for your exercise."
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"Gilligan, you sure have a way of making a fellow feel good."
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"You said that you wanted to run ten laps a day."
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"Right. If I run those ten laps, I'll lose some of mine."
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"- Some of your what? - My lap!"
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"Ten laps if I lose.."
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"Oh, never mind, Gilligan. Well, here I go."
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"Phew!"
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"- Oh, hi, Skipper. - Hello, Ginger."
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"Wow. Ten laps!"
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