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Clips from NewsRadio - The Cane (S02E02)

Come on, everybody. Grab some carpet. Let's go.

"Come on, everybody. Grab some carpet. Let's go."

NewsRadio

Mr. James, aren't you going

"Mr. James, aren't you going"

NewsRadio

to sit down on the floor with us?

"to sit down on the floor with us?"

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No, thanks.

"No, thanks."

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some pencils, pads for the guys, please?

"some pencils, pads for the guys, please?"

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Recognized.

"Recognized."

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Bill's ass hurts.

"Bill's ass hurts."

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second.

"second."

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Dave and I are going to need a few seconds

"Dave and I are going to need a few seconds"

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One, two, three cards.

"One, two, three cards."

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All right, sir.

"All right, sir."

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Uh, I was thinking

"Uh, I was thinking"

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to a live call-in show, in which--

"to a live call-in show, in which--"

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could air their complaints about living in the city.

"could air their complaints about living in the city."

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We could call it "Sound off, New York."

"We could call it "Sound off, New York.""

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I think it's a winner. Lisa?

"I think it's a winner. Lisa?"

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Hmm? What aren't you sure about?

"Hmm? What aren't you sure about?"

NewsRadio

Well, we are a news station,

"Well, we are a news station,"

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and, I mean, as interesting as a call-in show is,

"and, I mean, as interesting as a call-in show is,"

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Well, maybe,

"Well, maybe,"

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to feel more involved with the station.

"to feel more involved with the station."

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People listen to us so that they can be updated

"People listen to us so that they can be updated"

NewsRadio

on news, traffic, and weather,

"on news, traffic, and weather,"

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At least, that's my opinion.

"At least, that's my opinion."

NewsRadio

Lisa was just about to drop some science on us.

"Lisa was just about to drop some science on us."

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Yes, sir.

"Yes, sir."

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Okay, retreat's over.

"Okay, retreat's over."

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Well, it was,

"Well, it was,"

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Oh, I love his music.

"Oh, I love his music."

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Yeah, I don't,

"Yeah, I don't,"

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but I do have a line of snow tires

"but I do have a line of snow tires"

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Class is dismissed.

"Class is dismissed."

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Um...are you hungry?

"Um...are you hungry?"

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No, no, I'm feeling pretty tired.

"No, no, I'm feeling pretty tired."

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I'll probably just, you know,

"I'll probably just, you know,"

NewsRadio

Has anyone seen my cane?

"Has anyone seen my cane?"

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took off my coat, tap, tap, tap,

"took off my coat, tap, tap, tap,"

NewsRadio

I didn't take it, Bill.

"I didn't take it, Bill."

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I don't know.

"I don't know."

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Maybe it took itself out for a stroll.

"Maybe it took itself out for a stroll."

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When you deny it,

"When you deny it,"

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and, of course, my cane.

"and, of course, my cane."

NewsRadio

Trust me, my friend.

"Trust me, my friend."

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Me and my cane, when I find it,

"Me and my cane, when I find it,"

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will find you, and... you get the idea.

"will find you, and... you get the idea."

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Sorry I had to cut things short last night.

"Sorry I had to cut things short last night."

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So how did your talk with Paul Simon go?

"So how did your talk with Paul Simon go?"

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I think the world's going to have to wait

"I think the world's going to have to wait"

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for...a hazy shade of whitewalls.

"for...a hazy shade of whitewalls."

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Anyway, who's got something?

"Anyway, who's got something?"

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Joe.

"Joe."

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We could set up

"We could set up"

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Good. Anyone else? Bill.

"Good. Anyone else? Bill."

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An immediate and comprehensive probe

"An immediate and comprehensive probe"

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into the disappearance of office canes.

"into the disappearance of office canes."

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Zap.

"Zap."

NewsRadio

All right. Lisa.

"All right. Lisa."

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but I think we should start

"but I think we should start"

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doing morning subway updates

"doing morning subway updates"

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on the quarter hour

"on the quarter hour"

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A quickie, but I likey.

"A quickie, but I likey."

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Uh, yeah, well...

"Uh, yeah, well..."

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Mm-mmm. Yeah. I'm sorry. Yeah.

"Mm-mmm. Yeah. I'm sorry. Yeah."

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Well, uh, I...

"Well, uh, I..."

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it just doesn't feel like our station,

"it just doesn't feel like our station,"

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are really going to interfere

"are really going to interfere"

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with the hard news.

"with the hard news."

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Well, sometimes I take the subway,

"Well, sometimes I take the subway,"

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Yes.

"Yes."

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Dave stole my cane, and my ass still hurts.

"Dave stole my cane, and my ass still hurts."

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Okay.

"Okay."

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to contribute?

"to contribute?"

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Of course, I'm not sure

"Of course, I'm not sure"

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but, you know,

"but, you know,"

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Okay. That's it. That's it. That's enough, folks.

"Okay. That's it. That's it. That's enough, folks."

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There's enough bad vibes in this room

"There's enough bad vibes in this room"

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I'm sorry. What? Could you speak up?

"I'm sorry. What? Could you speak up?"

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I didn't hear that.

"I didn't hear that."

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[MUMBLING]

"[MUMBLING]"

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Sorry, what, sir?

"Sorry, what, sir?"

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[GRUNTS]

"[GRUNTS]"

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[GRUNTS]

"[GRUNTS]"

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Catherine, just give me the jar.

"Catherine, just give me the jar."

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Let me see it.

"Let me see it."

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Catherine... Catherine...

"Catherine... Catherine..."

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Catherine, just give me the jar.

"Catherine, just give me the jar."

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Ha. The bottle opener has disappeared.

"Ha. The bottle opener has disappeared."

NewsRadio

House key or car key, anything.

"House key or car key, anything."

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Impressive.

"Impressive."

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I'm assuming you dated a lot of frat guys.

"I'm assuming you dated a lot of frat guys."

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if I can't find the can opener?

"if I can't find the can opener?"

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Well, I'm just going to put these right there.

"Well, I'm just going to put these right there."

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out by the coffee.

"out by the coffee."

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with two tins of beans anyway?

"with two tins of beans anyway?"

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Laughing at us.

"Laughing at us."

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I didn't know we were so obvious.

"I didn't know we were so obvious."

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Oh, guess what? My phone broke.

"Oh, guess what? My phone broke."

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I can see that.

"I can see that."

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Good,

"Good,"

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How far do you think you can push me

"How far do you think you can push me"

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Okay. You know what?

"Okay. You know what?"

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I just need to know why you don't like me.

"I just need to know why you don't like me."

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I'd just like you a lot more

"I'd just like you a lot more"

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if you weren't bugging me all the time.

"if you weren't bugging me all the time."

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other people call "communicating."

"other people call "communicating.""

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Look, I'm the kind of person

"Look, I'm the kind of person"

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And I'm a little bit country.

"And I'm a little bit country."

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Ha ha. Come on.

"Ha ha. Come on."

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And you're a little bit rock 'n' roll.

"And you're a little bit rock 'n' roll."

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I don't want to talk to you.

"I don't want to talk to you."

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Hey.

"Hey."

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Mr. James?

"Mr. James?"

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Yep.

"Yep."

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Where's everybody else?

"Where's everybody else?"

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Carol? Yeah, go ahead and lock the doors,

"Carol? Yeah, go ahead and lock the doors,"

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and if you hear any yelling and screaming,

"and if you hear any yelling and screaming,"

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Yeah. All right.

"Yeah. All right."

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Sit, sit, sit, sit. Let's go.

"Sit, sit, sit, sit. Let's go."

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Lisa, fire away.

"Lisa, fire away."

NewsRadio

to live ones, we could save enough time

"to live ones, we could save enough time"

NewsRadio

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