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Clips from Scrubs - My Nightingale (S02E02)

"There. Just a tiny splinter."
Scrubs
"It's funny. I can't stop thinking about Aesop's Fables."
Scrubs
"Then the mouse pulls a thorn from his paw?"
Scrubs
"Right, and the lion kills him anyway. Yeah."
Scrubs
"- Oh, God, the ex-wife. - Jordan. What a coincidence!"
Scrubs
"- OK. Clumsy. - Don't answer that."
Scrubs
"No worries."
Scrubs
"Sandy."
Scrubs
"are both extremely grateful. Yeah."
Scrubs
"It sounds insensitive, but hospitals can be boring."
Scrubs
"OK, move it along, fellas, there's nothing to see here."
Scrubs
"I'll be over here."
Scrubs
"Think anyone else gets this excited over a car accident?"
Scrubs
"Maybe Hank."
Scrubs
"Baby, are you ready to rock?"
Scrubs
"we might have time to pull the stick out of your ass."
Scrubs
"- Perry! - Beelze-Bob."
Scrubs
"Anyway, I'd like you to be the one who introduces me."
Scrubs
"Here's an idea. Why not use Big Chief Flop Sweat here?"
Scrubs
"Ted's not an impressive man."
Scrubs
"- Hey, that... He's right. - You're OK."
Scrubs
"But don't worry. We're on top of it."
Scrubs
"Steady, Dr Turk, only about two more hours."
Scrubs
"but I'm afraid I'm gonna politely have to tell you to blow it out your ass."
Scrubs
"I think we both understand how this works."
Scrubs
"that I have nothing but contempt for."
Scrubs
"- That feels good, JD. - What?"
Scrubs
"I scratched my nose with Bad Guy's toe."
Scrubs
"Accept the fact we're the most underappreciated people here."
Scrubs
"It's actually not that bad. And the lace feels soft against my package."
Scrubs
"Nah."
Scrubs
"Next time we talk, maybe I could finish a sentence or two."
Scrubs
"Listen, girlfriend, I don't want to hear your misguided romantic notions."
Scrubs
"Cos you see, for me, sex is a sport, like racquetball."
Scrubs
"Play hard for half an hour, work up a sweat,"
Scrubs
"- and hope you don't get hit in the eye. - I know you care about her."
Scrubs
"I thought about what you said and you're right, I owe you."
Scrubs
"Hey, bro'."
Scrubs
"Or the nurse who everyone agrees is just a little bit off."
Scrubs
"Night-time security, non-arboreal gardening services"
Scrubs
"- You got promoted. - It's about time"
Scrubs
"He's been busting his hump around here for six years"
Scrubs
"Dr Kelso lets us practise here at night."
Scrubs
"No, no, no. That was lame."
Scrubs
"What attendings are stuck here on call tonight?"
Scrubs
"Is Carol the one with the really firm butt?"
Scrubs
"You're missing the point. No one is here tonight but us."
Scrubs
"It's amazing how, one moment, you think you know exactly what you want."
Scrubs
"And Bambi, room 201 needs an art line, room 202 needs reintubation,"
Scrubs
"to place a femoral swan under fluro on Mr Freed."
Scrubs
"Luckily, someone had the guts to take charge."
Scrubs
"You've all been on call before. So you don't have a safety net."
Scrubs
"That, my friends, is one nerdy honky."
Scrubs
"Always a charmer. Hi."
Scrubs
"What do you think of that?"
Scrubs
"- What am I supposed to do now? - Duck."
Scrubs
"Who paged me cos a patient thinks their tongue is too spongy? Who?"
Scrubs
"Yeah, look. Just go home and tell Jordan how you feel."
Scrubs
"- Tell a woman how I feel? - Well, I guess you could... Duck."
Scrubs
"- I hate ER docs. - You don't understand my relationship."
Scrubs
"Now that's just not funny."
Scrubs
"Yes!"
Scrubs
"His vitals are so weak, I wouldn't be confident taking him to the OR."
Scrubs
"Somebody needs to be decisive."
Scrubs
"is setting foot in the hospital's free clinic, at night."
Scrubs
"Ma'am, you don't have mono. But you do have halitosis. Mint?"
Scrubs
"Ma'am, three baby Tylenol is actually an underdose for a woman your size."
Scrubs
"You can see we don't have any more beds and we can't handle any more patients."
Scrubs
"Well, then, understand this. Chill out, bitty."
Scrubs
"Say it while I'm drinking water. Because I'm dying of thirst."
Scrubs
"- I watch you sleep. - That gives me the heebie-jeebies."
Scrubs
"It's too hard. I can't do it."
Scrubs
"But I have changed. I have."
Scrubs
"Good for you, buckaroo."
Scrubs
"I took the liberty of writing out my introduction."
Scrubs
"Lurch."
Scrubs
"- You put it up there. - That's really neither here nor there."
Scrubs
"But I use those for listening."
Scrubs
"Sometimes just making a decision is half the battle."
Scrubs
"We can make him better than he was before."
Scrubs
"Better, stronger, faster."
Scrubs
"Your shinunununununs could be louder."
Scrubs
"Good evening, everybody."
Scrubs
"Even though we know that tomorrow morning,"
Scrubs
"- Short for Sandra. - Clear."
Scrubs
"but I was having the flesh torn from my bones by a cross-eyed water snake."
Scrubs
"how one of you is in bed, and you guess who it is."
Scrubs
"Remember, I had no idea she was your ex."
Scrubs
"At least I remember the names of all my sexual partners."
Scrubs
"Officer Berson, shortness of breath and chest pain."
Scrubs
"We weren't the only ones psyched to be in the game."
Scrubs
"The doctor is in."
Scrubs
"Right. Another cocky resident that wants to start surgery"
Scrubs
"before the attending shows up."
Scrubs
"I just figured that if we finished here quick enough,"
Scrubs
"- Lackey! - Hey, Dr Cox."
Scrubs
"I'm being honoured tonight by the board of trustees."
Scrubs
"- Seriously? - Yeah."
Scrubs
"- Not interested. - I didn't ask if you were interested."
Scrubs
"Then use that passion. Put that rage on the page."
Scrubs
"Mary, Rhoda, chart, please."
Scrubs
"What, I stutter? Give me the chart."
Scrubs
"Get me a doughnut, will you?"
Scrubs
"I mean like a glazed thingy. And I like sprinkles on half of it."
Scrubs
"If you can't find a half-sprinkle, get all-sprinkles and pick half of 'em off."
Scrubs
"You know, that was kind of demeaning."
Scrubs
"You're right. Would you apologise to her while you get me some coffee?"
Scrubs
"And be quick or I'll have the manager send over a different waitress. Go."
Scrubs
"The frustrating thing was down in OR, Turk was probably running the show."
Scrubs
"Can you just scratch my nose, please?"
Scrubs
"No, I can scratch my nose."
Scrubs
"Miss Sullivan, I want to thank you and the rest of the board for this award."
Scrubs
"The fact your first choice passed away last week,"
Scrubs
"Are you sure? Cos it seems like it does."
Scrubs
"Bob, as far as the intro thing goes, I've given it a great deal of thought,"
Scrubs
"It's like when my dog Baxter goes winkle on the carpet."
Scrubs
"He always heads straight away from the tool shed,"
Scrubs
"We're residents now. We're supposed to have more responsibility."
Scrubs
"- Bambi, I really feel for you. - Thank you."
Scrubs
"She doesn't."
Scrubs
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