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Clips from Parks and Recreation (2009) - Halloween Surprise (S05E05)

"Ugh! Apology not accepted."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Stop talking, moron."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I wish I could stop smelling."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Dude."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Seriously, Jerry, did you eat farts for lunch?"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Tom! Jerry's having a heart attack."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Oh, no, I didn't know that."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Jerry, you okay?"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Okay, I've got some magazines"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Ha ha, Tom."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"How is he, Ann? Give it to me straight."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"He should be out of here in a day or two."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Doctor, medically speaking,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"how would you describe what happened to Jerry?"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Yeah, but he also exhibited excessive flatulence."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Not really."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I just want to hear the doctor"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"say that Jerry had a fart attack."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Is that too much to ask?"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"- Well, they did cause it. - Hey."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"No. That's okay."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I'm glad this happened."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"but no, this was a wakeup call."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I want at least another 30 years with Gayle and my girls."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Don't worry, Jerry, okay?"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"You are gonna have the future that you've always planned."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Okay, so I have arranged for the Parks Department"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"to throw a huge garage sale fundraiser for Jerry"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"to help pay for his hospital bills."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"The Pawnee municipal employee health care plan"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"and our insurance claimed that having a wrist"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"was a pre-existing condition."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I don't know, eight cents?"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"the first time I ever heard Vitalogy by Pearl Jam."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Yeah, that sounds about right."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Ron, you're not selling anything?"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I am selling this table."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I made it."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"So when am I gonna meet your new lover?"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I'm afraid things have hit a rough patch with Diane."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"She was not pleased with my babysitting performance"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"and left me a very loud message on my cell phone."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"if you just say you're sorry though."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I like Diane, but I'm not sure"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I'd have to take a whole week off work"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Hey, that's my name."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"All these boxes represent stuff"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Oh...Here are those ankle weights I bought you"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Chris Traeger-- exercise phase."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Tom Haverford-- my needless shopping phase."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Also my credit card debt phase."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Ann Perkins."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"has suffered a devastating fart attack,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"So there are some special auction items"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"The book's entitled The Thing About Me Is I'm Perd Hapley."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Anyway, let's start the bidding at $20. $20."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Thank you sir, for 20. Do I see 30?"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Mr. Kurtzwilder, it might be helpful if you told us"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Well, I guess you could say"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I was working at a small firm in Orlando,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Excuse me?"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"It was a classic Florida divorce."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"one day she cuts his junk off, throws it in the Everglades."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"And that case, that case made my career."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Frankly, your path to victory is narrow."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Governor Scott might be vulnerable,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"but you have very little name recognition."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I'm just saying, you should have put "spoiler alert""
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Also, not safe for work."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"You know, a lot of what you wrote was really profane."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"That movie's 25 years old, Morris."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"And if you don't like how I tweet, don't follow me."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"What are you doing now? I'm talking to you."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I'm live tweeting this dumb-ass conversation."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"- You like that coat? - Yeah."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"But $200? It's used."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I paid 150 for it, then added the scorpion."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I-I didn't expect to see you"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"after the...yelling that occurred."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Yeah, I was a bit stressed,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"but I'm not here to make excuses."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I just wanted to say that I am sorry for the way I reacted."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Apology accepted."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Oh. Yes."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"You look nice today."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Don't you feel a little bit bad about that?"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Too late."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Good-bye."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Oh, well, relationship over. Too bad."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Oh, my God, you are so sad."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"- I am not. - Ron, she's right."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I've trained extensively in the art of observation."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Okay, this is our final auction item."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"from mayor Gunderson's dog, Rufus."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Yeah, we need some big bids--"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Hey, how was the meeting?"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Kurtzwilder wants me to run his campaign from Florida."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"but it would probably mean putting our plans on hold."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Well, I mean, you know,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"No, I mean, I'm not making any decisions"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"until we talk about this and everything it would mean."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Hey, we're up to $60, not bad, right?"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Yes, Ann, bad."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"You might not care about Jerry's future, but I do."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Okay? We need to do something very drastic so he can be happy,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"so we can all be happy."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Uh, are you thinking what I'm thinking?"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Don't know what you're thinking,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"but I'm definitely not thinking"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"An evening with sexy nurse Ann Perkins."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"- No. - Yes."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Look at her, folks."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Unless she's into that, but no, she's not."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"- But you never know, right? - No!"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Let's raise some money."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Please, we need to do this"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"for Jerry and his future."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"This could be great, you know?"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Three out of four married couples"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"have met each other at spontaneous auctions."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
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