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Clips from Saved by the Bell - The Lisa Card (S01E01)

"Jessie got all "A's"..."
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"her parents bought her flowers."
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"Kelly got "B's"..."
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"her parents bought her an ice cream."
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"But Lisa made honor roll,"
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"Watch it, "Dimples." That's my fox you're talking about."
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"nor any other cute little animal you boys like."
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"Food's here."
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"Compliments of my new magic serving cart."
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"So where's the magic, Max?"
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"voilà!"
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"$62 for the top,"
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"$386? You think I went overboard?"
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"if you want to live to be "Daddy's big girl," take the stuff back."
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"Lisa, when you do something wrong, you should admit it."
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"Daddy, I don't know what to do."
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"- Good morning, class. - Good morning."
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"Could you write on the board again, your list"
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"we'll start with the Beatles, then throw in some Rolling Stones."
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"The male frog goes..."
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"Get away, creeps!"
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"like burrowing badgers."
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"Lisa!"
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"You made $36."
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"All right everybody,"
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"the "Lisa Special Sale" is about to begin."
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"Two dollars? That cost 20!"
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"I thought you slept with your dog."
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"Okay, how much am I bid for these cowboy boots?"
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"How much am I bid for the left one?"
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"I was wondering, what do you think of this?"
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"Come into my office, young lady-- Slater."
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"has caused an identity crisis?"
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"All I know is that I'm a size six."
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"Everybody thinks that."
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"Let it out, big guy."
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"The bidding is open."
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"But then I went to college and met the future Mrs. Belding."
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"Mr. Belding, maintenance wants you in the boys' bathroom."
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"Oh, we're just standing around doing macho guy stuff"
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"Imagine one person donating all this to our clothing drive."
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"See? I had the kitchen Velcro your orders."
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"Thanks."
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"Yeah, I got a tip. Alan Seltzer told me to get another job."
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"Waitress, can I have a glass of water?"
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"Waitress!"
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"Waitress! Where's my Ovaltine?"
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"Miss, this isn't what I ordered."
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"You were supposed to toast my buns."
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"I'll never make any money at this rate."
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"Well then, you've got to move faster."
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"Hey, what are you doing?"
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"Hey, come on you guys."
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"and Zack sells more of my clothes."
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"Uh... Lisa? Can we talk?"
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"No, I am. Look, I'm sorry, Lisa."
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"I'm sorry, Daddy."
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"Excuse me, Dr. Turtle. We came by to give this to Lisa."
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"Screech even sold his body to science."
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"It'll never happen."
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"We just got report cards."
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"and you should see what her father gave her."
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"Where's Lisa? I can't wait to see her new outfit."
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"Me too. She's my reason for being."
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"I cannot believe her father gave her his credit card to go to the mall."
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"I know. It's like letting a vampire loose in a blood bank."
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"Why don't you just find another chick?"
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"Whoa! May I remind you both that we are girls?"
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"We are not "foxes," not "chicks,""
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"Oh, it's..."
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"How do you like it?"
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"I love it, but didn't your father say to just buy something nice?"
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""Half-off"? I can't take this tension."
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"Lisa, I think you better total up everything you bought right now."
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"I have a calculator on my watch. You can use it if you hold my wrist."
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"Screech, heel."
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"- Where are the receipts? - Here."
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"$126 for the jacket and shorts,"
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"and $198 for the boots, purse"
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"and "Maneater" perfume?"
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"- Come on, what's the total? - $386."
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"Lisa, when your father finds out, you are going to get in trouble."
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"Oh come on. I'm "Daddy's little girl.""
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"Lisa, I think you should keep one thing and return the rest."
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"Maybe you're right. I have to go back to the mall anyway."
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"They're having a big shoe sale."
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"Oh."
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"Lisa, running away isn't the answer."
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"Do what I do when I do something wrong."
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"- What's that? - Enjoy it, then deny it."
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"What do you do, Kelly?"
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"Well, gee. I can't remember doing anything wrong."
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"I'm sorry. I'm just upset."
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"I've always been direct and honest with my parents."
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"I'm with Jessie. The truth is easiest, and it works."
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"But I can't tell my father."
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"Then why don't you tell your mother and pay her to keep quiet?"
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"- Pay her with what? - Put it on the card. Why stop now?"
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"Lisa, why can't you tell your father?"
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"Because I don't know how he'll react."
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"Come in."
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"- Hi, sweetheart. - Hi, Daddy."
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"What did you want to talk to me about?"
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"I've made a big mistake."
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"I'm sure it's not that bad, Princess."
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"Tell your father. He knows best."
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"Okay."
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"You what?"
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"Lisa-- Lisa-- Lisa!"
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"You..."
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"are a father's worst nightmare."
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"I'm not Daddy's little girl anymore."
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"He's going to kill me. I know it."
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"Don't panic. All you have to do is pay your father back."
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"Yeah, but where am I going to get the money?"
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"Ask for a $400 advance on your allowance."
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"Why don't you try to earn the money?"
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"Earn money? Moi?"
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"We're going to be raking it in all day."
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"- Starting now. - How?"
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