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Clips from South Park - Funnybot (S15E15)

"Sir, we've got a code six!"
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"All nuclear missiles are preparing for launch!"
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"What? There was no drill ordered!"
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"Attention, humans. I am Funnybot."
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"are being prepared to launch."
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"that the end of our country is imminent."
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"Good-bye, everybody."
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"I am going to spend my final minutes on this Earth"
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"But I simply can't help myself."
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"Stop it now... -"
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"aah!"
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"No use, guys."
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"He's got some kind of defense mechanism."
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"We've got to get it away from that control panel."
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"Wait! Wait a minute."
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"Whenever they try to distract a robot in the movies,"
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"they tell it some kind of paradox"
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"and actually, we think what you're doing is genius."
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"There is no logic in comedy award."
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"If I take comedy seriously, I am not comedian."
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"Non sequitur."
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"Must analyze..."
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"Well, that does it."
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"Thank you, boys, for teaching me"
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"to the imperfect biological beings."
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"What's going on?"
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"Please tell me that you'll never do that again, Jimmy."
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"Don't worry, fellas. I learned my lesson."
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"Here you go, fellas."
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"Be sure to get these handed in tomorrow."
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"Every student needs to go home and vote"
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"on their favorite choice in each category:"
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"Favorite comedy actor, favorite comedy movie."
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"And then on Friday during lunch and recess,"
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"comedy awards show!"
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"Dude, an awards show just for comedy"
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"Yeah, look, I don't think I can make it, Jimmy."
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"Attention, students, mkay."
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"There will be a presentation"
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"by the Special Ed Department in the gymnasium"
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"Friday during lunch and recess, mkay."
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"Attendance to this assembly is mandatory."
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"Which... - which I guess means I gotta suck it too, huh, mkay."
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"I've spared no expense to make my comedy awards"
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"the biggest thing this school has ever seen."
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"Welcome to the Special Ed Department's"
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"* Timmy Timmy-Timmy *"
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"* Look alive, Timmy *"
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"Can I get a wh... - wh- what-what?"
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"We are here today to honor those"
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"who tirelessly work so hard to make us laugh."
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"The first comedy award we are presenting"
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"And the nominees are..."
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"Clyde Donovan."
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"Kelly P. Gardner."
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"Jimmy Valmer."
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"Oh, wow, this is so exciting, isn't it?"
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"And the winner is..."
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"I can't believe I won!"
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"Wow, this is the greatest day of my life."
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"Thanks, everyone, for this incredible award."
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"And the winner for best comedy performance"
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"in a movie is... Ben Stiller!"
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"so I'll accept this award on his behalf."
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"And the award for funniest"
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"Correspondents' Dinner speech goes to..."
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"Is President Obama here?"
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"No?"
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"I guess we'll just accept this award on his behalf."
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"Wow, what a terrific audience. Isn't this great?"
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"Can I get another wh-wh-what-what?"
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"for the least funny people in the world."
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"And the nominees are..."
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"The Yupik Eskimos of the Chukchi Peninsula."
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"And the winner is..."
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"the Germans!"
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"Uh, I guess, unfortunately,"
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"the Germans could not be with us tonight,"
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"so I will accept this award on their behalf."
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"to the person who is most likely"
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"to actually show up to receive"
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"And the winner is..."
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"Yeah! Yeah!"
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"Yeah!"
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"Oh, man, I want to thank you all"
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"Or as Medea would say,"
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""Hallelujer!""
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"Oh, God, how embarrassing."
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"Good afternoont! Helllerrr!"
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"I'd also really like to thank my-"
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"Okay, thanks, Tyler Perry."
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"I just don't understand it, Dad."
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"Uh-huh."
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"I really feel like I did all that work for nothing."
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"Hmm. Mm-hm."
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"and I feel like I can't even get a response from you."
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"please just get a wh-wh-what-what?"
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"What... what?"
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"Jimmy, they're talking about your comedy awards"
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"The national news? Oh, my gosh!"
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"A school in Colorado has declared Germans"
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"the least-funny people in the world."
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"The First Annual Comedy Awards"
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"were held by the schoolchildren yesterday,"
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"and all of Germany is outraged."
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"The German president went on to assure the world"
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"that Germans have a great sense of humor,"
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"and that retaliation towards the schoolchildren"
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"who said they don't will be swift and brutal."
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"Dude, what the hell? Did you see the news?"
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"We told you doing a comedy awards show was a bad idea."
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"D-don't worry, fellas. Everything's gonna be okay."
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"Jimmy, do you what happened to the last people"
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"Germans we're pissed off at?"
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"Fellas, I know Germany isn't happy with us,"
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"but you have to admit that in a lot of ways,"
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"the First Annual Comedy Awards was a big success."
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"You can't even get Tyler Perry to go back home!"
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"Hallelujer!"
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"'cause I need pancakes!"
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