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Clips from Three's Company - Helen's Job (S02E02)

"I meant downstairs. I was asking Stanley to raise my allowance."
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"And he said, "No," and I got mad and said..."
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"I was gonna go out and get a job."
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"Hey, good for you."
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"- That's terrific. - What's terrific?"
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"Mrs. Roper's gonna get a job. Isn't that great?"
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"Oh, no, I'm not. And it's terrible. I don't want a job."
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"I'm just so thankful that he didn't take me seriously."
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"Oh, thanks for the maple syrup. Wait a minute, Mrs. Roper."
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"Why don't you have a little seat here for a minute? How come you don't want a job?"
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"Because I don't wanna go to work."
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"I-I-I enjoy staying home..."
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"just, uh, you know, puttering around the house,"
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"working in the garden, going shopping..."
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"Begging your husband for more money."
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"Oh, I can get around him on that."
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"I know a few tricks. Well, yeah, but that's demeaning."
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"Hey, now, hold it, girls. Don't call us "girls.""
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"Yeah. We're women."
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"Okay, hold it, women."
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"You know, if Mrs. Roper doesn't want a job, I don't think it's..."
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"Jack, would you please just stay out of this? Now, Mrs. Roper,"
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"a job could really be wonderful for you."
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"- It could change your whole life. - How?"
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"You wouldn't have to depend on Mr. Roper for anything."
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"That's the way it is now."
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"Wouldn't you rather be independent and be your own person?"
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"Look, fellas. Hey! Quit pulling!"
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"What are you trying to do? [ Scoffs ]"
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"We're just trying to help Mrs. Roper expand her horizons."
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"I thought we were trying to help her find a job."
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"Do you girls know anything about marriage?"
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"Certainly. It's when a boy and a girl fall in love..."
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"and live happily ever after, and everything they do is legal."
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"That's a fairy tale. That's for children."
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"That's right. If they want children, they can have them too."
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"Janet, what I'm trying to... Jack, look. All we're trying to do..."
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"is tell Mrs. Roper that this is the day of equal rights for women."
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"A woman has a right to make her own life..."
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"To go out in the world and make something of herself."
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"But, Janet, what about a woman's right to be a homemaker if she wants to?"
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"Isn't that an equal right too?"
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"Janet, all I'm saying is that it's none of our business."
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"It's not your business, it's not your business."
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"It's certainly none of my business, so I'm gonna keep my nose out of it."
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"That's a good idea, Jack. Thank you."
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"Now I can talk to Mrs. Roper without being interrupted."
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"Mrs. Roper, it just happens that..."
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"the cafeteria next to the flower shop needs a new cashier."
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"Why don't I go call the manager? He's a good friend of mine."
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"No, no, no! Janet, I told you I don't want a job!"
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"Janet, did you hear what she said?"
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"Yes, I heard what she said. And you said it was none of your business."
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"[ Doorbell Rings ]"
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"Oh, hi, Mr. Roper."
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"Where'd you go for the maple syrup, Vermont?"
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"Oh, I'm sorry, Stanley. We just got to talking, and... Talking?"
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"While I sat downstairs and watched my hotcakes get cold."
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"- I'm sorry. - It's all right."
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"What were you talking about? About Mrs. Roper getting a job."
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"No, I'm laughing. I mean, you working? That's really funny."
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"What do you mean? I could get a job if I wanted to."
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"Hold it, hold it. You're starting to make me laugh again."
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"Mr. Roper, if I were you, I'd drop the subject. You see..."
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"Jack, will you just stay out of this? I got enough trouble..."
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"Okay, you're on your own."
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"Mrs. Roper, good news."
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"I just spoke to my friend, and I talked him into trying you out."
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"He says the cashier's job is yours if you want it."
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"Why don't you at least check it out? Here's the address."
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"She doesn't want a job."
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"If you don't mind, Stanley, I can speak for myself."
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"Fair enough. You tell her you don't want it."
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"If I wanted to take that job, I would."
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"Over my dead body, you would."
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"You just made me an offer I can't refuse."
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"[ Doorbell Rings ] Come in. The door's open."
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"Hi, Jack. I hope I didn't catch you at a bad time."
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"I'm waiting for my bread to rise, and I'm making a cake."
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"Oh, good. I was afraid you were busy."
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"Something I can do for you, Mr. Roper?"
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"Yeah. You know, I'm not the kind of guy to go around borrowing things."
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"You know, my wife went to work today, and I..."
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"You wanna borrow a wife?"
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"Do me a favor, would you? Once you start beating this, you're not supposed to stop."
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"A little faster."
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"Just, uh... Just keep beating that until it's nice and fluffy."
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"What is this we're making?"
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"It's a lemon swirl pound cake."
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"Oh, it sounds delicious. You hungry?"
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"No. I had a great lunch. I made it myself."
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"- Oh, really? What'd you have? - Peanut butter sandwich."
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"Well, we must exchange recipes sometime."
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"There's nothin' to it. All you need are two pieces of bread,"
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"some peanut butter and a knife."
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"Gee, I wish I had time to write that down."
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"Boy, what do they teach you guys at cooking school?"
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"Okay, that's fine. I'll take over now, thank you."
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"So, how's your day been without Mrs. Roper?"
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"Oh, nice and quiet."
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"Like, when I'm reading, nobody barges into the bathroom and disturbs me."
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"You're doing okay then?"
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"Yeah, terrific. As a matter of fact, I could do whatever I want."
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"Like, right now, I'm going down to the Regal Beagle and just relax."
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"Boy, I tell ya, Jack, I'm-I'm just fine."
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"This guy is doing just fine."
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"Mmm. This is good. Want a taste?"
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"Mr. Roper, wasn't there something you came up here to borrow?"
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"Oh, yeah. You wouldn't happen to have a jar of peanut butter, would you?"
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"Oh. Sorry. I never use it. I hate the way it sticks to the roof of the refrigerator."
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"I'm doin' just fine, girls. Just fine."
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"What was that all about?"
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"I guess he's found out he doesn't need his wife anymore."
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"You see, I told you what would happen if you insisted on meddling."
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"Oh, Jack, don't exaggerate."
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"What Mrs. Roper is doing will probably really help their marriage."
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"[ Doorbell Rings ] That's right. I mean, next time we see Mrs. Roper,"
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"she'll be a whole new different woman."
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"Did you have a nice day, Mrs. Roper?"
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"Mrs. Roper, you look so... Different."
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