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Clips from Three's Company - And Mother Makes Four (S01E01)

"Oh, she went to see her dentist."
Three's Company
"If she finds out--I mean two girls living in an apartment"
Three's Company
"With a man, you know what she'll think."
Three's Company
"Oh, come on, Chrissy, people are doing it all over the place."
Three's Company
"That's what she'll think."
Three's Company
"Well, I thought that your father was the problem?"
Three's Company
"Your father's living with two girls?"
Three's Company
"[ Laughter ]"
Three's Company
"We've got no time. I'll put his stuff away."
Three's Company
"You take him down to the Regal Beagle, and keep him there"
Three's Company
"Until I call and tell you mother's gone, okay?"
Three's Company
"Right."
Three's Company
"Okay, let's go."
Three's Company
"Do I have to?"
Three's Company
"Oh, you'll love it there-- The beer is flat,"
Three's Company
"But the barmaid's not."
Three's Company
"Move 'em out. [ Laughter ]"
Three's Company
"[ Laughter ]"
Three's Company
"How you doing? Nice to see you."
Three's Company
"Oh, hello."
Three's Company
"Oh, hey."
Three's Company
"I'm so glad you changed your mind."
Three's Company
"Come on, sit down."
Three's Company
"Thank you."
Three's Company
"Have a drink."
Three's Company
"[ Laughter ]"
Three's Company
"Hi."
Three's Company
"Hi."
Three's Company
"What'll it be?"
Three's Company
"And you?"
Three's Company
"I'll have a couple of--"
Three's Company
"[ Laughter ]"
Three's Company
"One beer is fine."
Three's Company
"Coming up. [ Audience cat calls ]"
Three's Company
"She's so healthy."
Three's Company
"[ Laughter ]"
Three's Company
"Down, boy. [ Laughter ]"
Three's Company
"I knew it."
Three's Company
"You're not gay, are you?"
Three's Company
"Huh? Oh, uh..."
Three's Company
"Oh, come on, I won't give you away."
Three's Company
"No, I’m not."
Three's Company
"I'm as normal as Mr. Roper."
Three's Company
"Don't spoil it. [ Laughter ]"
Three's Company
"But you don't have to worry, Mrs. Roper,"
Three's Company
"There is nothing going on in our apartment."
Three's Company
"Nothing."
Three's Company
"There's nothing going on in ours either."
Three's Company
"[ Laughter ]"
Three's Company
"Hello, mother."
Three's Company
"Oh, I’ve never seen such traffic--"
Three's Company
"Hello, mother."
Three's Company
"--And these L.A. cabs are terrible."
Three's Company
"They smell of pickled onions."
Three's Company
"[ Laughter ]"
Three's Company
"Hello, mother."
Three's Company
"Oh, hello, darling. [ Kissing sounds ]"
Three's Company
"My poor feet."
Three's Company
"Oh, you've had the carpet cleaned."
Three's Company
"No, the walls just got dirtier. [ Laughter ]"
Three's Company
"Oh, that's nice, dear."
Three's Company
"I'll fix you something to eat."
Three's Company
"Oh, no thanks, I can't stay long."
Three's Company
"I have to catch the 10:45 bus back to Fresno."
Three's Company
"Wonderful."
Three's Company
"I mean, you look wonderful. [ Laughter ]"
Three's Company
"How's father?"
Three's Company
"Oh, he's fine dear, but he worries about you."
Three's Company
"We both worry about you living in this terrible town."
Three's Company
"Are you sure you want to stay here with all the crimes"
Three's Company
"And the muggings?"
Three's Company
"Oh, mother, it's not really--"
Three's Company
"Oh, I’ve read all about the wild parties and orgies,"
Three's Company
"People running around without any clothes on."
Three's Company
"Where would you read a thing like that?"
Three's Company
"In your father's church magazine."
Three's Company
"[ Laughter ]"
Three's Company
"Mother, I wouldn't know an orgy if I fell over one."
Three's Company
"Oh, try not to do that, dear. [ Laughter ]"
Three's Company
"By the way, how are those nice girls you room with?"
Three's Company
"Janet and Eleanor, isn't it?"
Three's Company
"Oh, Janet’s fine. Eleanor left to get married."
Three's Company
"How nice."
Three's Company
"Did you get another girl for her room?"
Three's Company
"No, no, we didn't get another girl."
Three's Company
"That's wonderful."
Three's Company
"No sense in my going back home this late."
Three's Company
"Now you can put me up for the night."
Three's Company
"[ Laughter ]"
Three's Company
"How much longer do I have to stay here?"
Three's Company
"Oh, just until Chrissy calls."
Three's Company
"I'm kind of bushed, and I’d like to go to bed."
Three's Company
"Oh hey, honey, how about a game of darts?"
Three's Company
"Oh, no thanks, I don't even know how to play."
Three's Company
"[ Laughter ]"
Three's Company
"Have another beer."
Three's Company
"No, I want to go home to my own room to sleep in my own bed."
Three's Company
"I don't want another beer."
Three's Company
"Would you like another beer?"
Three's Company
"Oh, yeah. [ Laughter ]"
Three's Company
"Oh, thank you. That's got to be Chrissy."
Three's Company
"Well, I can see I’m out-gunned around here."
Three's Company
"[ Laughter ]"
Three's Company
"Besides, I got to get home and make the cocoa for Omar Sharif."
Three's Company
"Good night, Mrs. Roper."
Three's Company
"Good night, honey."
Three's Company
"'Night."
Three's Company
"Oh, good night."
Three's Company
"What do you mean, your mother's staying?"
Three's Company
"Where's Jack going to sleep?"
Three's Company
"Well, there's the bus station."
Three's Company
"The cops will pick him up."
Three's Company
"What about the 24-hour laundromat?"
Three's Company
"The hookers will pick him up."
Three's Company
"Janet, you've got to do something."
Three's Company
"Me? Hey, it's your mother."
Three's Company
"Well if it was your mother, I’d do something."
Three's Company
"Good. Then just pretend your mother is my mother and do it."
Three's Company
"[ Laughter ]"
Three's Company
"Well, dear, I think I’ll turn in early."
Three's Company
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