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Clips from Brooklyn Nine-Nine - Two Turkeys (S05E05)

"- Fine. I'll put on some pants."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- Thanks."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- Squad, bullpen, now."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"my pie was gone. Which one of you took it?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"At us. It was clearly Hitchcock and Scully."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- Well, these aren't pie crumbs."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"and one good old fashioned potato chip."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"No pie here. I just humiliated you."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- Look, this doesn't have to be a big deal."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Whoever took that pie, come forward"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Smart. You knew I would never forgive you."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"But you're dumb if you think"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"I won't get to the bottom of this."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Everyone here is a suspect."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- Okay, not off to a great start."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"My mom brought a passive-aggressive turkey"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"and we all saw your dad's penis through his undies."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- No, I wasn't. It all happened so fast."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- Hey, everyone, I'm sorry for not being "dressed.""
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"I didn't think you guys were gonna be so early."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- We arrived at the agreed upon time."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- Right. So, like, super early."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- Convo grease. Convo grease them right now."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- Yes. Mrs. Peralta,"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"You know, my mom paints as well."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- Really? - Yes."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"I paint on canvases though. - Oh."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- And that's different? - Very."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"to be too restricting."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"For me with bowls and vases and furniture,"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"the world is my canvas."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- Yes, and for me, with canvas,"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"the canvas is my canvas."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- She said "canvas" so much. - Who wants to hear a joke?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- No, I mean like a joke joke,"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"where I say it and you laugh."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- No, then I'm not interested."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- Oh. Well...golf."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- Yes, golf. Anyone hit the links lately?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- I don't play golf. - What are you talking about?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"You played it all the time when I was a kid."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- Never played golf in my life. - Jake, your remembering"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- Oops. - But it's okay now."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"We're happy, we're back together..."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- We're cool. - And, you know,"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"all relationships have rough patches."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Right, Camila? - No."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- Jake. - Hair."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"We all have hair."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- Mm."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"None of the convo grease worked."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- We need a new plan. There's gotta be some way"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"to make them get along. - Maybe we could play a game."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- No. No games. My dad gets super competitive."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"He used to flip out on me when I beat him at Adult Clue."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"It was the only board game he had at his condo."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"All the murder weapons were sex toys."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- Oh, okay. You know what?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"It's bad. He got kicked off a bird watching tour once."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- Look, a kingfisher. - No, no, no, no, no."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"That's the same bird I saw earlier."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"All right, so it's agreed."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"We steer clear of all competition."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- Why can't there be some magic potion"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"that makes everyone happy and have fun all the time?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- Who wants some alcohol?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"[camera clicks] - Thank you very much, David."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"That'll be all."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"There are no prints on the box, no DNA evidence,"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"and the security camera in my office was obscured,"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"which means whoever took my pie"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"thought it through. And that means..."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- It wasn't Hitchcock and Scully."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"I think it's time we had a little chat."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"A day? A week? A year?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Or is this the only reason you joined the force to begin with?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- So you think I became a cop just so I can steal your pie?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"No, don't tell me why you did it."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Tell him. - You want me to talk to"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"this picture of your husband?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- Look him in the eye and tell him what you did."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"No, Terry, I'm not mad at you."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"and that's the most natural thing in the world."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"If you're so innocent, where were you"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- I was at the gym."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- Everybody has an alibi. How convenient."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"So I hope you're comfortable because I will keep you in here"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"all day if necessary! [knocks on door]"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"We need the room to question someone"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"about the Red Hook homicide. - Oh, no problem."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"We'll be right out. - Okay, we are one glass in."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- Good. Let's keep it going. I think we need to top 'em off."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"and every morning I do what I'm told,"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- Oh, I get it. So a riddle is just like a fact"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"that's told in a really confusing way."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- Exactly. - Hey, I used to fly"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- Between us, I could have landed that plane on the ground"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- And is my dad scatting?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- [scatting continues]"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- This is amazing. - Oh, my."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- Who wants more wine?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"[paper crinkling] - Now we're drinking this."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"[cheers and applause] - Rum from Cuba!"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- I saw what you did this morning"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"when you deduced the contents of my bakery box."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Impressive. Now I need to use your skills"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"to find my pie."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- Here's what we need from you."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"A list of the pie's ingredients."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- We're looking for anything that might linger"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"from the water fountain, the crumb consistency was dry."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Whoever ate it's gonna be thirsty."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- Now what kind of crimped edge are we dealing with here?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"U-shaped or V? - I don't know."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"and find out."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- Drinking just makes people get along better."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Do you think if I got my parents drunk"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"every day when I was a kid they would have stayed together"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"and we would have had a happy family?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- Probably. Yeah. - Right. Yeah."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
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