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Clips from Chappelle's Show - Episode #1.5 (S01E01)

"Chappelle's Show."
Chappelle's Show
"Yeah, yeah."
Chappelle's Show
"(cheers & applause)"
Chappelle's Show
"Welcome, everybody."
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"this is incredible."
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"But I've been having fun since the show came out, man."
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"Yeah, what's it called?"
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"Armadale!"
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"These guys are really the new entrepreneurs, man."
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"They got clothes, they got vodkas."
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"And then I stayed home the other day,"
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"and you know, when you at home,"
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"I got 'em, I tape 'em, here goes one right here."
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"motherfucking tiz-ight!"
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"y'know what I mean?"
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"What? Nothing."
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"(cheers & applause)"
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"No, I'm serious, look."
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"with your stinkin' ass?!"
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"and get all that shit, you got celery and lima beans"
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"It was yummy going down."
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"You need something, why not call on your man?"
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"(announcer) Redman Potty Fresh,"
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"that gets your toilet bowl sparkling white."
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"You got those awful stains out."
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"I don't know if you guys watch those old NFL films."
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"And I think they should also honor regular people"
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"I want to honor the people"
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"who get booty under tremendous circumstances."
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"So, right now I present"
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"(narrator) At the Areola 54 Bar and Grill,"
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"That was a big night for me."
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"Ashley Evans,"
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"At that moment, Johnson heard the eminent whistle"
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"Hey, hey, you forgot your scarf."
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"the way they did that fateful night..."
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"(cheers & applause)"
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"How's this? Go!"
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"I'd better keep an eye on Sara."
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"Me better not go to bathroom."
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"and call it "Manifest Destiny"."
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"at home in the wide shot,"
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"It's a patchwork,"
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"might've had a feeling,"
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"to ask all the questions that made them so curious."
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"And I got comedian Paul Mooney..."
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"for Richard Pryor for many years,"
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"and some say one of the best comedians working today."
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"it's time for "Ask A Black Dude"."
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"black people walk like that 'cause we have style,"
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"we got flavor, we got rhythm."
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"I mean, the black man in America"
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"is the most copied man on this planet, bar none."
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"Black people just like to party."
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"They have that in their blood."
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"(laughing)"
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"of a brilliant, young man."
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"and, some would say,"
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"It's overwhelming, I'm so used to taping a comedy show."
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"I can describe 'em."
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"Mmm, hello, police?"
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"and come lay down with me."
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"Permission to carry out one last mission, sir?"
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"Let's take a look."
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"My lady... hey!"
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"and foundeth her... her birthday present early."
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"The last maiden that accused me of lying,"
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"Ooh, oh, ow, oh..."
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"You get some rest, ta-ta."
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"David, I've spoken to many actors"
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"a handicapped man with a heart of gold."
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"(Chappelle) Short foot..."
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"(man) Sir, let me help you."
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"Shut up... oh!"
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"I don't need your damn pity."
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"May I have a double cheeseburger..."
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"Aah!"
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"(man) Chappelle's Show. Ow."
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"Whoo, oh, snap! What's up, dog?"
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"'cause we got some business we got to take care of,"
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"(Chappelle) I'm rich, biatch!"
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"(man) 30% more."
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"You're so young, Jackson."
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"Red, is my career down there?"
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"Chappelle's Show."
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"Ow."
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"Whoo-hoo-hoo."
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"Let's start the show."
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"I've been going out to, like, parties and stuff,"
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"you see commercials you don't see in the daytime"
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"that you might see in the nighttime?"
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"Hey, what's the matter?"
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"Pam, do you you have anything sanitary?"
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"I'm all out and my flow is heavy."
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"Do I?"
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"with Roca-pads."
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"It's the Roc, holler!"
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"What are you doing?"
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"Roca-pads."
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"Now, you think that that's the worst of it?"
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"Check this one out."
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"Hey, hey, where do you get these stains from"
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"Redman... well, how does it work?"
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"Holler!"
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"that collaborate together to make some kind of mixture"
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"Flush the toilet with your pancake ass, bitch!"
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"the same way that they honor these warriors of football."
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""Great Moments In Hook-Up History.""
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"during the cold November of 1999,"
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"I'd been on an eight-week losing streak, man."
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"I needed to pull out a win and I needed it then."
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"I don't think so."
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"(woman) Bartender, I would like another drink."
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"And I would like a man."
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"Can anybody take this drunk, horny, crazy woman home?"
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"(train whistle)"
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"As the pass went up, Johnson sprung into action."
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"Will you take me home?"
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"Oh, yes, yes, I will."
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"(speaking in Arabic)"
Chappelle's Show
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