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Clips from Taxi - Louie and the Nice Girl (S02E02)

All right, listen up here, everybody!

"All right, listen up here, everybody!"

Taxi

New rule here,

"New rule here,"

Taxi

new rule.

"new rule."

Taxi

Yes, we do take out cabs with bald tires.

"Yes, we do take out cabs with bald tires."

Taxi

We do.

"We do."

Taxi

What?

"What?"

Taxi

Louie, I'd like you to meet Zena Sherman.

"Louie, I'd like you to meet Zena Sherman."

Taxi

Zena, Louie DePalma.

"Zena, Louie DePalma."

Taxi

Zena wanted to meet you.

"Zena wanted to meet you."

Taxi

Oh, yeah?

"Oh, yeah?"

Taxi

Yeah.

"Yeah."

Taxi

I think maybe you'll, uh... like each other.

"I think maybe you'll, uh... like each other."

Taxi

Oh.

"Oh."

Taxi

How do you do?

"How do you do?"

Taxi

Hi.

"Hi."

Taxi

All right, if you'll excuse me now,

"All right, if you'll excuse me now,"

Taxi

I'll leave you two alone.

"I'll leave you two alone."

Taxi

I have to get some bald tires on the road.

"I have to get some bald tires on the road."

Taxi

I like your goodies.

"I like your goodies."

Taxi

Almost a year now.

"Almost a year now."

Taxi

You do it very well.

"You do it very well."

Taxi

Um... my cousin is getting married tomorrow night.

"Um... my cousin is getting married tomorrow night."

Taxi

Would you like to go to the wedding?

"Would you like to go to the wedding?"

Taxi

It's a free dinner.

"It's a free dinner."

Taxi

Thank you.

"Thank you."

Taxi

I'd really like to.

"I'd really like to."

Taxi

Swell.

"Swell."

Taxi

What are you looking at me for?

"What are you looking at me for?"

Taxi

She wanted me to introduce her,

"She wanted me to introduce her,"

Taxi

so I introduced her.

"so I introduced her."

Taxi

It's just one date.

"It's just one date."

Taxi

She could have his baby.

"She could have his baby."

Taxi

( screams )

"( screams )"

Taxi

Sorry I'm late...

"Sorry I'm late..."

Taxi

( chortles )

"( chortles )"

Taxi

I didn't even have time to change.

"I didn't even have time to change."

Taxi

You'll have to excuse my attire.

"You'll have to excuse my attire."

Taxi

She ripped the shirt off my back.

"She ripped the shirt off my back."

Taxi

But I guess when you're burning

"But I guess when you're burning"

Taxi

the candle at both ends

"the candle at both ends"

Taxi

for five weeks straight, you're going to have to pay the price.

"for five weeks straight, you're going to have to pay the price."

Taxi

Give me three cards, all right?

"Give me three cards, all right?"

Taxi

He's driving me crazy.

"He's driving me crazy."

Taxi

There's only one consolation in this whole sordid affair.

"There's only one consolation in this whole sordid affair."

Taxi

Yeah, what's that?

"Yeah, what's that?"

Taxi

I didn't introduce them.

"I didn't introduce them."

Taxi

All right, now remember our agreement:

"All right, now remember our agreement:"

Taxi

Nobody asks him nothing.

"Nobody asks him nothing."

Taxi

ALEX: Right.

"ALEX: Right."

Taxi

I can keep this up.

"I can keep this up."

Taxi

I'm only human, I mean.

"I'm only human, I mean."

Taxi

( chortles )

"( chortles )"

Taxi

How much pleasure can one man endure?

"How much pleasure can one man endure?"

Taxi

Isn't anybody the least bit curious

"Isn't anybody the least bit curious"

Taxi

as to why I didn't have time to change this morning

"as to why I didn't have time to change this morning"

Taxi

or yesterday,

"or yesterday,"

Taxi

or the day before, ad infinitum?

"or the day before, ad infinitum?"

Taxi

What do you got, what do you got?

"What do you got, what do you got?"

Taxi

I got nothing.

"I got nothing."

Taxi

Alex, I thought at least you would be interested

"Alex, I thought at least you would be interested"

Taxi

in the intimate details.

"in the intimate details."

Taxi

After all, you are kind of responsible.

"After all, you are kind of responsible."

Taxi

( chortles )

"( chortles )"

Taxi

I don't want you to do that anymore.

"I don't want you to do that anymore."

Taxi

Do what?

"Do what?"

Taxi

( mimics chortling )

"( mimics chortling )"

Taxi

I don't do that.

"I don't do that."

Taxi

Yes, you do, you do it almost continuously.

"Yes, you do, you do it almost continuously."

Taxi

Yes, you do. You do it every time you mention Zena.

"Yes, you do. You do it every time you mention Zena."

Taxi

( chortles )

"( chortles )"

Taxi

You just did it.

"You just did it."

Taxi

I did? Really?

"I did? Really?"

Taxi

I don't even know

"I don't even know"

Taxi

I'm doing it.

"I'm doing it."

Taxi

I'll tell you what:

"I'll tell you what:"

Taxi

Look, I don't have to hold up my hand.

"Look, I don't have to hold up my hand."

Taxi

You do it every time you mention her name!

"You do it every time you mention her name!"

Taxi

You're crazy!

"You're crazy!"

Taxi

( chortles )

"( chortles )"

Taxi

I don't even realize I'm doing it.

"I don't even realize I'm doing it."

Taxi

you'd be hee-hee-heeing, too, if you were having

"you'd be hee-hee-heeing, too, if you were having"

Taxi

experiences with a woman like...

"experiences with a woman like..."

Taxi

I got to tell somebody.

"I got to tell somebody."

Taxi

I don't even let people I like touch my hair.

"I don't even let people I like touch my hair."

Taxi

Whisper in my ear and you'll be whispering for life.

"Whisper in my ear and you'll be whispering for life."

Taxi

Nah!

"Nah!"

Taxi

Hey, Louie, they want you upstairs.

"Hey, Louie, they want you upstairs."

Taxi

Okeydoke.

"Okeydoke."

Taxi

Listen, Zena is going to be in any minute now.

"Listen, Zena is going to be in any minute now."

Taxi

Tell her that I'm going to pick her up

"Tell her that I'm going to pick her up"

Taxi

tonight at 8:00 sharp.

"tonight at 8:00 sharp."

Taxi

We're going to go out to dinner.

"We're going to go out to dinner."

Taxi

At least, we're going to try to go out to dinner.

"At least, we're going to try to go out to dinner."

Taxi

* Macho, macho man

"* Macho, macho man"

Taxi

* I'm a macho man...

"* I'm a macho man..."

Taxi

I'll tell you, I just can't understand Zena.

"I'll tell you, I just can't understand Zena."

Taxi

You know what my theory is?

"You know what my theory is?"

Taxi

she must see some quality in Louie that we've always missed.

"she must see some quality in Louie that we've always missed."

Taxi

Yeah, my theory is that Louie must have

"Yeah, my theory is that Louie must have"

Taxi

some redeeming virtue that we've always overlooked.

"some redeeming virtue that we've always overlooked."

Taxi

My theory is, Zena is nuts.

"My theory is, Zena is nuts."

Taxi

That makes more sense.

"That makes more sense."

Taxi

Hi, everybody!

"Hi, everybody!"

Taxi

Hey, Zena, how you doing? Oh, hi, Zena.

"Hey, Zena, how you doing? Oh, hi, Zena."

Taxi

Hey, Alex, could I talk to you for a minute, alone?

"Hey, Alex, could I talk to you for a minute, alone?"

Taxi

Hey, would you guys...?

"Hey, would you guys...?"

Taxi

I know I'm imposing, but I hoped you wouldn't mind.

"I know I'm imposing, but I hoped you wouldn't mind."

Taxi

I mean, you did bring Louie and me together.

"I mean, you did bring Louie and me together."

Taxi

I have a feeling when I die, they'll put that on my stone.

"I have a feeling when I die, they'll put that on my stone."

Taxi

Yeah?

"Yeah?"

Taxi

Uh, it's kind of personal.

"Uh, it's kind of personal."

Taxi

It embarrasses me to talk about it.

"It embarrasses me to talk about it."

Taxi

All right, we've been seeing each other for five weeks,

"All right, we've been seeing each other for five weeks,"

Taxi

and, uh, being normal, healthy adults

"and, uh, being normal, healthy adults"

Taxi

it's natural we'd have some physical involvement.

"it's natural we'd have some physical involvement."

Taxi

Yeah.

"Yeah."

Taxi

So why haven't we?

"So why haven't we?"

Taxi

I mean, you know Louie.

"I mean, you know Louie."

Taxi

What is it?

"What is it?"

Taxi

Why won't he touch me?

"Why won't he touch me?"

Taxi

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