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Clips from Batman - The Joker Is Wild (S01E01)

"We have two more jewels for our collection."
Batman
"My comic cronies."
Batman
"Batman and Robin, the dashing diamonds of derring-do."
Batman
"We've got a little diamond cutting to do."
Batman
"Is Batman to become just another jewel"
Batman
"[laughing]"
Batman
"Here's a joke on you, you fiend."
Batman
"It's the gasser."
Batman
"This is the end of your evil career."
Batman
"That cursed utility belt again."
Batman
"[coughs]"
Batman
"I swear by all that's funny"
Batman
"I shall never be fooled by that insidious"
Batman
"unconstitutional device again."
Batman
"Two heads for the price of one."
Batman
"[coughing]"
Batman
"Could this be a threat? Will The Joker keep his vow?"
Batman
"Can he?"
Batman
"How?"
Batman
"Gotham Pier Amusement Park."
Batman
"What more appropriate place to find the hideout of The Joker?"
Batman
"Never again will Batman have the advantage over me"
Batman
"No, never again will that ghastly girdle thwart my plans."
Batman
"For I, the Clown Prince of Crime"
Batman
"have found the answer to it."
Batman
"- What is it, Joker? - My own utility belt."
Batman
"Gee, terrific."
Batman
"- Can I try it-- - Hands off, you fool."
Batman
"It is for me, only."
Batman
"Me, your merry master."
Batman
"It's secrets are my precious property."
Batman
"What does it do, Joker?"
Batman
"Everything."
Batman
"It's my Aladdin's lamp."
Batman
"Gee, can I make a wish on it?"
Batman
"Do, my pretty!"
Batman
"Gee, I'd like a million bucks."
Batman
"- A sable wrap-- - Oh, common place."
Batman
"A two-week ocean cruise?"
Batman
"Extraordinary."
Batman
"What, Joker?"
Batman
"Just the thing."
Batman
"The most astonishing coup anyone ever pulled."
Batman
"Queenie, quick, get me that newspaper."
Batman
"Here you are, Joker."
Batman
"S.S. Gotham."
Batman
"The new super luxury liner"
Batman
"going to be launched this Saturday. Yes!"
Batman
"Gosh, you think you could use your utility belt to, uh"
Batman
"get me a cruise on the S.S. Gotham."
Batman
"A cruise? Mere petty pilfering."
Batman
"I'll get you the whole ship!"
Batman
"- What? - The whole ship?"
Batman
"- How, Joker? - Ah! First steps first."
Batman
"Our old nemesis Batman."
Batman
"- 'He'll try to stop us.' - Exactly. Exactly."
Batman
"We must first eliminate Batman from the scene."
Batman
"[laughing]"
Batman
"Since you're the majority stockholder in"
Batman
"Gotham shipping lines, Bruce, I hope you'd be pleased"
Batman
"to hear that I've arranged for Batman and the Boy Wonder"
Batman
"to christen the S.S. Gotham when she's launched on Saturday."
Batman
"[glass shattering]"
Batman
"What is it, commissioner? What does it mean?"
Batman
"It looks like a clown doll to me."
Batman
"(O'Hara) 'The Joker.'"
Batman
"Could he be subconsciously pointing toward his next crime?"
Batman
"Maybe he's gonna rob the circus."
Batman
"Oh, no, no, no. The circus left town last week."
Batman
"(Gordon) 'Batman should know about this immediately.'"
Batman
"[beeping]"
Batman
"I'm sorry, commissioner, but Batman is out for the day."
Batman
"Yes, sir. Yes, sir. I'll leave word that you called."
Batman
"He's not there."
Batman
"What are we to do now, commissioner?"
Batman
"I don't know. I just don't know."
Batman
"Well, don't worry. I'm sure the police department can handle it."
Batman
"Dick and I are already late for that Chopin concert."
Batman
"If you need anything, please let us know."
Batman
"Yes, I'll do that, Bruce."
Batman
"Oh, by the way, it may sound strange but.."
Batman
"...I wonder if I could keep that doll for a souvenir."
Batman
"- Any use for it, O'Hara? - Hmm, not for me."
Batman
"The sooner we get this out of headquarters"
Batman
"the better I like it."
Batman
"A souvenir of your narrow brush with crime."
Batman
"Thank you, commissioner."
Batman
"We're already late for the concert"
Batman
"but if you need us for anything just let us know."
Batman
"Huh? A fat lot of help he'd be against someone like The Joker."
Batman
"Oh, he's a good man Bruce Wayne."
Batman
"But not even all his money could buy us another Batman."
Batman
"Gosh! Nothing but perfectly ordinary dust patterns."
Batman
"I'm disappointed alright."
Batman
"I'd hope for some clue to the location of his secret hideout."
Batman
"Think it's worth checking for secret writing?"
Batman
"No, I hardly think so."
Batman
"That's not The Joker's way of working."
Batman
"Why did The Joker throw the doll through the window?"
Batman
"What was the point of it?"
Batman
"- I think I've got it. - You have, Batman?"
Batman
"What other kind of clown is there besides a circus clown?"
Batman
"I'll give you a hint, tonight, there's gonna be a live telecast"
Batman
"of the Gotham City opera company."
Batman
"Golly, Batman, I still don't get it."
Batman
"They're performing a certain celebrated Italian opera."
Batman
"Holy ravioli!"
Batman
"Your warm."
Batman
"(together) Pagliacci!"
Batman
"[singing in foreign language]"
Batman
"[singing continues]"
Batman
"That's beautiful."
Batman
"I-I always.."
Batman
"I always loved that song."
Batman
"Melancholy, baby."
Batman
"[laughing]"
Batman
"[crowd clapping]"
Batman
"Joker!"
Batman
"[crowd screaming]"
Batman
"[laughing]"
Batman
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