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Clips from Veep - Debate (S03E03)

"Yeah, I want their heads on my wall."
Veep
"- Hi, Catherine. - Hi."
Veep
"That's Jackson. I hired him to sharpen up Selina's answers."
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"- does want. - Okay, let's rehearse the debate."
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"Congressman Furlong, can you be Joe Thornhill?"
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"but I do know about baseball."
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"if someone pulls your string, okay?"
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"- but was too afraid to ask for. - Right."
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"- ...tomorrow. - Yeah."
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"Look at that, Mom."
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"People are gonna start to think we're sisters now or... or siblings."
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"That's always been the case. We always get that."
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"- Hi. - Ma'am."
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"- Thank you. - Okay."
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""Short hair for the long haul.""
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"- That's good, I like that. - Thanks, guys."
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"Dan, what are you doing here?"
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"of "everything's fine.""
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"- Uh, yes, please. - Yeah? Okay."
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"I'm much more centered. I'm better."
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"- and because I need your brain. - Thank you."
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"- Mike is Chung. Uh-huh."
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"because he is a complete asshole."
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"Yeah, is there a smoking condom?"
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"- Yeah, I poked everything that moved back then. - You did."
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"God, I feel so powerful!"
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"Oh, my God. The president will not stop calling."
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"- Ma'am? - Did you notice?"
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"- Did you see that? - Not at all."
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"Sue, I cannot stress to you enough"
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"I have to go out and find a friendly style reporter,"
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"- Okay. - Oh, Wendy. I'll text her."
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""Reaffirm, reform, renew.""
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"- Renew. - Yes."
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"- I like them. - You do?"
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"Okay."
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"Meeting is over. Pleasantries, et cetera."
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"It's called "muscle memory.""
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"- This is gonna be on television. - What about Botox?"
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"- Sure am, boss. Sure am. - Yep, yep."
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"We're gonna be onstage in about five minutes, everybody."
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"- Oh, nice to see you, Congressman Pierce. - Madam Vice President."
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"- Hey, George. - Hi. How are you? I like the new hair getup."
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"Get me some fruit, some mango."
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"Yes, sir, of course. Absolutely."
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"Well, here it is, game one of the series."
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"Oh, I wonder if we should take a picture."
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"- Should we, um... - No, I think..."
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"Mr. Egan, I see you've shaved. Wise."
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"You don't have the facial gravitas for a beard."
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"- You're talking to me now. - I was just practicing."
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"- Yeah. - Completely."
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"I happen to know all about sanctuary states, ladies."
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"See you later."
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"- All right. - Yeah."
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"You have to literally not sweat."
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"You can turn sideways. Twitch, smile, turn."
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"- No. - Madam Vice President, 30 seconds to air."
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"- Thank you. - Is the twitch really bad?"
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"- Okay. - Yeah."
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"Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome"
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"Nice air kiss. I think he actually missed the air."
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"I'm just an ordinary guy"
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"I may not know much about running the country,"
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"Neither did George Washington."
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"Very good. Now compare yourself to Lincoln and Buddha."
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"well, I guarantee you..."
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"we're going all the way to the pennant."
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"The focus groups love him."
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"Today, we're here to talk about records."
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"Here comes the burning tank story where he saves the one guy"
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"and the rest of us get fuckin' tortured."
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"I wasn't thinking about myself."
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"I was thinking about my friend."
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"I was thinking about his family."
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"Look at him throwing his water everywhere."
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"- The thing we... the... - Wendy, hey."
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"- Secretary Maddox. - Yes?"
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"I'm talking about words like..."
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"the economy... jobs..."
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"And, uh, ahem..."
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"the American people wanna listen to."
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"And now to you, Madam Vice President."
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"- Yeah. - Ray has a say?"
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"She does not say nay to Ray. You know what I'm sayin'?"
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"and I am the best multitasker on my team."
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"Hello, Mike."
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"Call every whore and mistress in America"
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"until you find the right one."
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"Besides, Selina is waiting for the signal."
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"As in "honey." That doesn't work."
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"I mean, anywhere but here."
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"Okay, just what exactly did Gary say, okay?"
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"- Thornhill had an affair? - What the hell is wrong with you?"
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"that you should join up and serve your country,"
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"Are we all allowed to speak at once now?"
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"You know what? I would like to hear what the coach has to say."
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"- That's manager. - Manager. That's fine."
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"who's spent my entire professional career"
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"helping them to achieve their potential"
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"young adult unemployment has always been a priority for me."
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"Seems to me the vice president has taken her eye off the ball."
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"According to the dials, Thornhill's still out front."
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"Okay, we really, really need"
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"- He fucked her. - Oh-hh!"
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"This feels better than actually having sex yourself."
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"and I have no skeletons whatsoever in my closet."
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"The question is, can we all say the same here?"
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"- Dan, you get the press ready. - Yeah."
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"I would like to share with the American people."
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"Crap."
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"...and support of my amazing wife, Chrissy."
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"Strong enough for me to tell you this, America."
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"then you can vote for me."
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"My amazing wife Chrissy, ladies and gentlemen."
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"- There she is, my darlin'. There she is."
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"Thornhill just ran the Thornhill story,"
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"So now you have to tell me about FLOTUS."
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"This is what our marriage is gonna be? This?"
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"- and finding... - Are you guys fighting? Please don't fight."
Veep
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