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Clips from It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia - The Nightman Cometh (S04E04)

"Who's the mark?"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"Look, I just wrote a musical to write a musical, okay?"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"I don't have a ulterior motive here."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"Hang on there, pal."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"The Nightman Cometh."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"Okay, gather around."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"Please, everybody. Let's gather down front."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"I feel the magic Do you feel the magic?"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"Now, you guys, you all know Artemis."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"No more interruptions now, Dee. Thank you, please."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"Everybody got laid all the time."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"Charlie, what the hell is this play about?"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"Well, why am I in love with a little boy?"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"- You're in love with a young man. - You wrote "boy"."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"- and does karate across the stage. - Where are you getting that from?!"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"This is great. That frees up the lead boy role and the dayman role."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"Tiny boy, little boy, Want to make love to you, boy"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"Yes."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"but I'm not convinced you know what it means."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"'Cause it says we're supposed to do that at the end of the song,"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"Okay, Artemis, please don't talk to the talent."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"You know what? Um..."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"- Thank you. - Whoa, no, no, no, no, don't cut the song, man."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"I'm not going to do that. He wants me to bang this baby,"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"Thank you, Artemis. Thank you very much."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"Okay, Dee, the song is history."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"Thank you, Charlie. I appreciate that. 'Cause I was uncomfortable."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"- Charlie, this is my big song. - Yeah, yeah."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"Oh, I'm sorry, Dee."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"No, Charlie wrote a musical and came to Dee with it."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"Or I could strap on a wig and I could do the song myself."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"song or no song?"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"- I never wasn't going to sing the song. - You were excited about singing a song,"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"So back up on your podium you go."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"So let's... you know what, let's try and get this down."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"Let's do it."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"You've got to pay the troll toll To get in"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"You want this baby boy's hole, You've got to pay the troll toll"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"- Okay. Thank you. - Charlie, can I bring something up?"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"Well, sure, I pay the troll toll, and then I rape Dennis."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"No, you don't rape him. You become him."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"Okay, once he gets near you, you have to sense him, okay?"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"I have a free ticket for you to see a musical that I wrote."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"I'm gonna cut you a bargain, okay? I'm gonna cut you a little deal."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"and you're not gonna call me at 3:00 in the morning and tell me that"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"you are in the emergency room in the hospital because you had a terrible car accident?"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"- Well, yeah, because I consider you that. - I have to go!"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"All right, I swear to God I'm gonna leave you alone."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"- Leave me alone. - You're not gonna regret it."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"We're not gonna start..."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"Circle in, everybody."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"- What? Why? - It's cool. She knows all the songs."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"Like, a hundred times now."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"Just get her out there and get the play started!"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"What the hell you doing?"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"You can't be throwing us curveballs like this."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"It's gonna happen."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"I feel good, oh!"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"- What I'd do to you. - Boy, I need you, boy."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"What? What is happening?"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"And I am available to any interested men."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"You sucked."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"I was hearing a lot of laughs out there, bro."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"Gasps are where it's at."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"Gotta go pop my cat eyes in."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"You gotta pay the troll toll to get in..."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"Troll toll"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"Troll toll!"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"I could smack everyone into tiny, little pieces."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"Come over here and scratch my itchy-witchy toesy-woesies."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"You control nothing."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"I was transformed..."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"I am now..."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"The Dayman."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"I didn't tell you what to do. You're skipping a line, dude."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"I'm going to kick your ass, bro."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"I am the master of light."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"And now I am in love with you."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"friendship for everyone."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"Champion of the sun"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"You're a master of karate and"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"friendship for everyone"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"Stage freeze."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"I was that little boy. That little baby boy was me."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"So if you want to marry, man,"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"That's it. You can go home."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"This was a great musical. You did a great job."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"Told you nobody just writes a musical for no reason."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"I am here."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"I am passed here."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"I am here."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"Come one, Come all to a beautiful show"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"Some other musical stuff."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"- You wrote a musical? - Why, why did you do that?"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"Just to write a musical. Does there have to be a reason? I don't think so."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"Yeah, there does. Nobody writes a musical for no reason. That doesn't make sense."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"All right, this guy did, so there you go."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"- What? - Yeah."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"No, there's no... there's no mark, guys."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"I wrote a musical. It's pretty damn good, okay?"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"- I want to put it on. - Right. What's your angle?"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"- I don't have an angle. - Whose face are we shoving this musical in?"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"You don't shove a musical in someone's face."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"- What are you talking about? - But who versus?"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"Who are we doing it versus?"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"Oh, my God, are you guys going to make this about this?"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"I'm not trying to screw anyone or gain anything out of it."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"You know what, if you guys don't want to be in it,"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"Yeah, there's no reason to give away our parts, okay?"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"- All right. - No, we'll do it. What's it called?"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"Here we go!"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"- So round of applause for Artemis. - Very nice."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"Yeah, right."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"Okay, well, Charlie, I got a question for you. Who's playing this lead boy?"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"- Oh, yeah! Lead, of course. - Wait, who's playing the dayman?"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"Well, the lead boy becomes the dayman when he defeats the nightman."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"- So it's also Mac. - Two parts? Oh, yeah!"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"- Wait, that's bullshit, bro. - The nightman's a better role."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"He gets to play two roles? I mean, come on."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"- It's the same person... - Charlie, who's playing the troll guy?"
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
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