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Clips from South Park - Cartman Joins NAMBLA (S04E04)

"You can deny it or cover it up."
South Park
"Dude, I don't understand this game at all."
South Park
"You have to decide if you deny it or cover it up!"
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"- I'm Bill Curtis. - All right, Cartman,"
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"Kyle has AIDS and now loses 47 turns and 800 points."
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"We just might get working on it later tonight."
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"and now you're gonna bring another kid into the world."
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"You don't pay tax dollars, Cartman. You're eight!"
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"I can't even relate to you guys any more because you're too immature!"
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"No, no, no. Me... You guys..."
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"Maybe a little more down here."
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"Great idea, Clyde Frog! I can meet new friends on the Internet!"
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"Here's a chat room."
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"Sure, Tony, that would be cool."
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"You see that, Clyde Frog?"
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"Tomorrow I'm gonna meet my first mature friend!"
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"- Yeah! - I brought you some candy."
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"Wow, cool!"
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"And some books on Kama Sutra."
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"You see, I've really been having a tough time."
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"We don't really relate any more."
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"Do you like having your back rubbed?"
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"We monitored your little online chat. Now you're coming with us."
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"Kenny, you have to change the baby's diapers!"
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"- The baby! - The baby!"
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"- Stop it! - Come on, let's go try to"
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"I'll play catch with you later, son."
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"All right, here comes a pop fly. See if you can catch it."
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"- What happened? - He smacked me in the balls!"
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"Hello, HungDaddy."
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"Sorry, I'm not interested in being friends with midgets."
South Park
"That's cool. We can hang out. What do you wanna do first?"
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"This little boy was trying to have his way with me."
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"This has to be the work of Stan and Kyle. God, I hate those guys!"
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"Old people have to hook themselves into it with a tube"
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"Yeah!"
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"All right, just what the hell do you guys think you're doing?"
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"- We don't know. - I'll tell you why!"
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"a government conspiracy against me!"
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"We don't know what you're talking about, lard butt."
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""Lard butt. " That's so mature."
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"God, I guess I was wrong about you guys, huh?"
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"You're not more mature than us, Cartman!"
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"I'm telling you, this is all a terrible mistake, Officer Barbrady!"
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"The North American Man/Boy Love Association,"
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"and we heard about these political prisoners you are keeping."
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"until I hear from the FBI."
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"- Hate mongerer, hate mongerer! - Hate mongerer, hate mongerer!"
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"Okay, people, I think you better move along"
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"I did not want love from a young boy. I like men my own age!"
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"I mean, I like women. What did I say? Oh, God, I love titties!"
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"You haven't heard the last of us, Officer. Together we are strong. Come on, men!"
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"Wow, they got activists for everything these days."
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"with a piece of provolone cheese."
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"Do you know what this means, Kevin? No more will the world have to look"
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"in two different places for squirrels and provolone cheese!"
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"No more will mankind have to pick... Who could that be?"
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"- Okay, thanks, Doctor Mephisto! - Sure!"
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"Fellow members of NAMBLA, as you know,"
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"Recently, the FBI has started to arrest men"
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"And now that all ethnic groups, homosexuals"
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"and womens are protected under civil rights laws,"
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"- we want the same! - Yeah!"
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"Thank you, thank you, Jesus."
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"Sweet."
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"And he fixed my shattered left testicle, too."
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"No big deal, I just found a group called NAMBLA,"
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"It looks like I'm finally gonna have mature friends who I can relate to."
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"Oh, God!"
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"Just a few more pictures, Eric. You make a perfect poster child."
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"- Really? Awesome! - Yes, and we want you to"
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"Great, you go invite your little friends, and we'll get the hotel ready."
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"Kick ass!"
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"And North Park Funland"
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"Note, people with heart conditions and expectant mothers should"
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"You know, I think maybe Kenny's feeling a little worried about the new baby."
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"We have to show him that he's still our little boy."
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"What'd he say?"
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"And that means I'm gonna invite everybody,"
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"Hey, Clyde! Butters! Check this out!"
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"Dude, maybe we do need to start being more mature."
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"Push now, push hard!"
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"It's alive!"
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"Bad baby! Bad!"
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"What are you doing, Kenny?"
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"- This is for mature people only! - We got invited, too, fat ass."
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"Fellow NAMBLA members, it is great to see you all here!"
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"It seems like we have finally found a city that won't oppress us!"
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"Yeah."
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"- This is boring. - Yeah!"
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"But first, I'd just like to hear from a couple of you on your progress."
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"I found a little eight-year-old named Butters."
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"Well, I sure am, I guess."
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"Timmy! Timmy?"
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"- Hold it right there! - Nobody move!"
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"where are the children?"
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"Yeah, those perverted bastards!"
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"Thank you. Now let's go get those other NAMBLA bastards"
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"- Yeah! - Yeah!"
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"Yeah!"
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"and get to know our new young boys."
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"Everyone come up and grab your room keys, and we'll head upstairs."
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"I know, dude. Let's get the hell out of here!"
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"All right, Marlon Brandos,"
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"they've got to be here somewhere. Let's try this room."
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"No, you've got the wrong NAMBLA again."
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"- Timmy! - What are we gonna do?"
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"Well, Cartman, you got everybody into this,"
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"Well, look, those perverts aren't going to rest"
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"until they've made love to one of us, right?"
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"and take one for the team."
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"And I think, in all fairness, it should be Butters."
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"One of the boys just came in!"
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"Don't touch me."
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"I just wanna go home and take a hot bath!"
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"You see, I've learned something today."
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"Our forefathers came to this country because they believed in an idea,"
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"You see us as being perverted because we're different from you."
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"We are human."
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"Most of us didn't even choose to be attracted to young boys."
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