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Clips from Lucifer - BlueBallz (S05E05)

"right before you tried to electrocute him on stage last night."
Lucifer
"Last night?"
Lucifer
"I was here, protesting."
Lucifer
"I'd never hurt anyone."
Lucifer
"I just need Jed to move the shelter."
Lucifer
"You know he works here, right?"
Lucifer
"The guy should be thanking me for protecting this neighborhood."
Lucifer
"Just last weekend, I caught a homeless woman breaking into his place."
Lucifer
"Chased her out of that gate."
Lucifer
"Okay, so Jed said the last time he saw his headphones was last weekend."
Lucifer
"Well, why would a homeless woman want to kill Jed?"
Lucifer
"Maybe she wasn't homeless?"
Lucifer
"Maybe she broke in to tamper with the headphones?"
Lucifer
"She could be the one who wanted to murder Jed."
Lucifer
"Assuming anyone wanted to murder Jed."
Lucifer
"[crowd screams]"
Lucifer
"[crowd exclaiming]"
Lucifer
"[Lucifer panting] Are you okay?"
Lucifer
"Yeah."
Lucifer
"[Blanco] Is everyone okay?"
Lucifer
"We need to stay back."
Lucifer
"Well..."
Lucifer
"isn't this convenient for Jed?"
Lucifer
"[scoffs]"
Lucifer
"His place blowing up? How?"
Lucifer
"Well, first someone tries to electrocute him on stage,"
Lucifer
"yet "accidentally" kills someone else."
Lucifer
"Now someone tries to blow him up, yet fails again?"
Lucifer
"Either Jed is the luckiest target alive,"
Lucifer
"or he's behind all this."
Lucifer
"Jed would be here right now if we hadn't kept him at the precinct."
Lucifer
"-Yet he isn't. -He could have been blown to bits."
Lucifer
"-Yet he wasn't. -Why do you think he's behind all this?"
Lucifer
"Well, clearly he's orchestrating all this to get close to you again."
Lucifer
"-That's ridiculous. -Is it?"
Lucifer
"Electrocuting a colleague?"
Lucifer
"Blowing up his own studio?"
Lucifer
"No one would go that far just to be near me."
Lucifer
"Well, I did go to Hell and back for you, twice, but who's counting?"
Lucifer
"[police sirens approaching]"
Lucifer
"Lucifer, are you jealous?"
Lucifer
"[chuckles] Jealous?"
Lucifer
"Of a man-boy who scratches records for a living? Now who's being absurd?"
Lucifer
"I'm simply saying how convenient it is for DJ Dingus"
Lucifer
"that any and all evidence that could have been in that studio"
Lucifer
"is now completely destroyed."
Lucifer
"-Wait, maybe not all of it. -Hmm?"
Lucifer
"Blanco, he said that the woman who broke in,"
Lucifer
"she escaped through that gate."
Lucifer
"Maybe we can pull some prints."
Lucifer
"Over, over,"
Lucifer
"and tuck, right?"
Lucifer
"Yeah."
Lucifer
"-Yeah, but... -Looks right to me."
Lucifer
"...every time, his arms just keep popping out everywhere."
Lucifer
"At first I thought it was because he had some sort of super strength, but..."
Lucifer
"then he couldn't even hold up his rattle, so I don't know, maybe not."
Lucifer
"The crazy things we think our kids can do, huh?"
Lucifer
"[Amenadiel chuckles]"
Lucifer
"I just..."
Lucifer
"can't seem to do anything right."
Lucifer
"Come on."
Lucifer
"Don't be so hard on yourself."
Lucifer
"Look, what I'm saying is,"
Lucifer
"everybody gets it wrong."
Lucifer
"Not Linda."
Lucifer
"Linda always knows what to do, and I'm always in the way."
Lucifer
"Ah, I'm sure Linda feels just as clueless as you do."
Lucifer
"What's important is that you care,"
Lucifer
"and you're trying your best."
Lucifer
"[sighs]"
Lucifer
"I suppose so."
Lucifer
"Still, it would be nice if I could get Charlie to stop crying just once."
Lucifer
"[Dan laughs]"
Lucifer
"Well, I have faith in you, pal."
Lucifer
"Thanks for being such a great friend, Dan,"
Lucifer
"and for taking the day off to help."
Lucifer
"Well..."
Lucifer
"wasn't entirely selfless."
Lucifer
"I couldn't stand another minute around Chloe's ex."
Lucifer
"The guy's perfect."
Lucifer
"He makes me feel so bad about myself, you know?"
Lucifer
"And I kind of already do that enough on my own."
Lucifer
"What are you talking about?"
Lucifer
"-You're a great guy. -[scoffs]"
Lucifer
"Hey."
Lucifer
"Great cop, great dad."
Lucifer
"And your hair, it's so high."
Lucifer
"[laughs]"
Lucifer
"Thanks, man."
Lucifer
"There are things you don't know about me."
Lucifer
"Things I've done."
Lucifer
"And no matter how hard I try..."
Lucifer
"I just don't think I'll ever make up for them."
Lucifer
"Listen to me, Daniel."
Lucifer
"We all have our demons."
Lucifer
"Myself included."
Lucifer
"But believe me when I say this..."
Lucifer
"I know evil."
Lucifer
"And you, my friend, are not it."
Lucifer
"[Chloe] Okay, so we're looking for Belinda Roberts."
Lucifer
"Ella pulled her prints off of Jed's gate."
Lucifer
"A park ranger said her car's been here over a day, so she's probably hiding out."
Lucifer
"Great. Let's just find her so we can finally be done with this case."
Lucifer
"So you're finally over the idea that Jed's behind all this?"
Lucifer
"Of course not. Once we find this Belinda woman, Jed's co-conspirator,"
Lucifer
"we'll get her to prove he's involved, and then we can all go back to life pre-Jed."
Lucifer
"Oh."
Lucifer
"Well, I was hoping we could, um, solve this case, uh, before the sun goes down."
Lucifer
"Like I said, sooner rather than later."
Lucifer
"[woman] Stop!"
Lucifer
"One more step and you'll die."
Lucifer
"-Detective! -Oh!"
Lucifer
"Careful. I know how to handle snakes."
Lucifer
"-[Chloe panting] -There..."
Lucifer
"Careful."
Lucifer
"-[Chloe] Is it-- -[woman] No!"
Lucifer
"Do you know how long I have been waiting for copulation?"
Lucifer
"You and me both."
Lucifer
"Clearly you're not aware"
Lucifer
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