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Clips from That '70s Show (1998) - No Quarter (S05E05)

"Donna, you're so sweet for letting Jackie live here with you while her mom is-"
That '70s Show (1998)
"- You know. - Whoring around Mexico?"
That '70s Show (1998)
"Donna, that is not fair."
That '70s Show (1998)
"I think she left Mexico."
That '70s Show (1998)
"Well, you know, Jackie and I might have fun."
That '70s Show (1998)
"- Sort of like a... slumber party. - Mm-hmm."
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"Yes, late-night girl talk..."
That '70s Show (1998)
"hot oil massages..."
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"and the furtive whispers of, "We shouldn't!""
That '70s Show (1998)
"And then, "Shh! It's okay!""
That '70s Show (1998)
"- Is that all you're bringing? - Oh, um, just a couple more small things."
That '70s Show (1998)
"- Out of the way, Jackie. - Comin' through!"
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"Got a buttload!"
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"Heavy. Can't... feel... my fingers!"
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"- Yup! - Ooh."
That '70s Show (1998)
"Yeah, I bet they'd have a French accent too."
That '70s Show (1998)
"My girlfriend's panties, Kelso? Is that really a road you want to go down with me?"
That '70s Show (1998)
"What's that, panties?"
That '70s Show (1998)
"[Chuckling] Oh, no! I can't tell Hyde that one!"
That '70s Show (1998)
"Naughty panties!"
That '70s Show (1998)
"What's that, fist? It would be my pleasure."
That '70s Show (1998)
"Here you go. One general-issue military cot..."
That '70s Show (1998)
"slightly used from my days in the National Guard."
That '70s Show (1998)
"Well, it's good to know that the National Guard was gettin' a good night's sleep..."
That '70s Show (1998)
"while I was in the South Pacific dodgin' bullets and using coral as toilet paper!"
That '70s Show (1998)
"So- [Sighs] I don't think there's gonna be room for everything."
That '70s Show (1998)
"All right. Where goes the horse?"
That '70s Show (1998)
"Guys, if I enroll in the police academy in the fall..."
That '70s Show (1998)
"I could be bustin' heads in a year!"
That '70s Show (1998)
"Freeze, dirtbag!"
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"Wow, you did make me freeze. [Chuckling]"
That '70s Show (1998)
"But I was a dirtbag long before you came along."
That '70s Show (1998)
"Hey. Says here you're supposed to start getting into shape now."
That '70s Show (1998)
"No, no, that's not for me. That's for the regular guys."
That '70s Show (1998)
"I haven't done a lap in gym class since I had my eighth-grade growth spurt..."
That '70s Show (1998)
"and Miss Brady made me her special assistant. [Chuckles]"
That '70s Show (1998)
"Guys! Look at this. I just got another collection letter..."
That '70s Show (1998)
"from the jewelry store about Donna's engagement ring."
That '70s Show (1998)
"- I gotta get some money, or I'm screwed. - There's a job at the hotel."
That '70s Show (1998)
"My boss would have hired ya. Then he talked to Red."
That '70s Show (1998)
"I gotta do something. This is a threatening letter."
That '70s Show (1998)
""Call us immediately"?"
That '70s Show (1998)
"It's-It's in all capital letters."
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"Look at you. Another dirtbag dodgin' his responsibilities."
That '70s Show (1998)
"Not on my beat. Game over, dirtbag!"
That '70s Show (1998)
"[Chuckles] Man, I wish I had some handcuffs."
That '70s Show (1998)
"Here, use mine!"
That '70s Show (1998)
"I'm learnin' to do magic!"
That '70s Show (1998)
"(Rock Group Singing)"
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"(Ends)"
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"Hello, Wisconsin!"
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"[Sighs] Jackie."
That '70s Show (1998)
"I thought you were gonna put everything away."
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"I did. The hardest thing was finding room for my shoes."
That '70s Show (1998)
"But then I realized I could just fit them inside your shoes."
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"Uh-huh."
That '70s Show (1998)
"Look, let's just get some sleep. [Sighs]"
That '70s Show (1998)
"- Good night. - Good night."
That '70s Show (1998)
"## [Stereo: Women Singing Pop]"
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"Jackie! Turn that off!"
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"- [Groans] - ## [Clicks Off]"
That '70s Show (1998)
"See, Donna, I need music to fall asleep."
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"See, I wear earplugs so I can just barely hear it..."
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"but it needs to be loud enough, because I like the vibration in the bed."
That '70s Show (1998)
"So, how am I supposed to get to sleep?"
That '70s Show (1998)
"Think of something boring. You know, like school. Or Eric."
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"## [Clicks On]"
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"## [Ends]"
That '70s Show (1998)
"Hey."
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"I sold some of my albums to get some money for Donna's engagement ring."
That '70s Show (1998)
"Made three bucks."
That '70s Show (1998)
"Which means I am- Let me see, carry the one, um-"
That '70s Show (1998)
"Oh! Still completely screwed."
That '70s Show (1998)
"They wouldn't take Anne Murray's Greatest Hits?"
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"Is this whole crazy world turning upside down?"
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"Be nice to Anne, okay? She's a beloved Canadian songstress."
That '70s Show (1998)
"And I'm glad they didn't take her, because- Well, the worse I feel, the more I need her."
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"Why do you have money?"
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"What'd you do, mug a Girl Scout? [Scoffs]"
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"No, I've been selling my albums."
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"Oh, I hope you didn't sell that "Froggy Went A-courtin"' record."
That '70s Show (1998)
"You know, when we were toilet-training Eric..."
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"And he would just run straight off and make a jobby."
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"- [Laughing] - [Chuckling]"
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"You know, it occurs to me that since I paid the allowance..."
That '70s Show (1998)
"that bought those records in the first place, that money's mine."
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"It occurs to me that possession is 9/10ths of the law."
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"Keep up with the smart mouth, and my foot'll be 9/10ths of the way up your ass."
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"You know, Forman, you should write a book:"
That '70s Show (1998)
"Things My Father Threatened To Put In My Ass."
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""Chapter One: His Foot.""
That '70s Show (1998)
"I'd buy that."
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"- Ew! - Donna, don't you knock?"
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"Not when it's my room!"
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"Well, we're in here, so-"
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"Yeah, well, I'm in here, so-"
That '70s Show (1998)
"Hey, if you want to watch, I can get into that."
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"Have a seat on the horse."
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"- Hey, how was your weekend, Roy? - Aw, pretty good."
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"Think I might have met a woman."
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"- Aw, that's great, man. - She's stayin' at the hotel."
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"When I took butter to her table, she looked right at me and said..."
That '70s Show (1998)
""Took you long enough.""
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"Huh?"
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"- [Dinging] - All right! Here I am!"
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"Oh, Steven, meet our new kitchen assistant."
That '70s Show (1998)
"You hired Kelso?"
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"Do you know how many fires this guy's started?"
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"Three electrical, two chemical, and one that even surprised me."
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"Yeah, if I'm gonna be a cop, I gotta quit modelin', I mean-"
That '70s Show (1998)
"I can't have the perps lookin' at pictures of me half-naked."
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"Oh, and, uh, everywhere I work, I like to feel at home..."
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"so I brought a little somethin' ofJackie's."
That '70s Show (1998)
"Okay, uh, I think that's a health code violation."
That '70s Show (1998)
"But I'm gonna look the other way, which is hard to do, 'cause-"
That '70s Show (1998)
"Look, panties! [Chuckling]"
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"[Laughing] Yeah, I burned you with the panties again!"
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"Two days, two locations. That burn is on tour."
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"[Sighs] Yeah. [Clears Throat]"
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"I guess Roy didn't make things clear, but, um..."
That '70s Show (1998)
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