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Clips from Big Mouth (2017) - Four Stories About Hand Stuff (S04E04)

"I mean, all my gay friends are hand-jobbing."
Big Mouth (2017)
"But you and Aiden aren't hand-jobbing."
Big Mouth (2017)
"-Oh, God, should we be? -Ooh! Ooh! He just squeezed your hand."
Big Mouth (2017)
"-What does that mean? -Isn't it obvious?"
Big Mouth (2017)
"He wants you to grab his boy rope and play tug-of-war with his taint!"
Big Mouth (2017)
"-Really? -And before you ask,"
Big Mouth (2017)
"there's literally nothing else it could mean!"
Big Mouth (2017)
"I don't know, Maury, I don't think I'm ready to give Aiden a hand job."
Big Mouth (2017)
"That's fine! He can jerk you off."
Big Mouth (2017)
"-What if I don't wanna do any of it? -You have to do it."
Big Mouth (2017)
"I do? Why?"
Big Mouth (2017)
"Because of the sacrifices of your gay forefathers."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Have you not seen my episode of Spunk History?"
Big Mouth (2017)
"You mean Drunk History?"
Big Mouth (2017)
"-No, no, no, Spunk History. -Hmm."
Big Mouth (2017)
"I chug a bunch of my own jizz"
Big Mouth (2017)
"-and tell stories about the past. -Uh-huh."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Anyway, I'll show it to you. It's on my phone."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Sorry it's cracked. I dropped it in the bathroom."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Oh! Hachi machi, this stuff is strong."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Okay, where were we?"
Big Mouth (2017)
"So when the Bible was happening, the prophet Abraham was like..."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Hey, I'm Abraham."
Big Mouth (2017)
"And God says, "It's Adam and Eve,"
Big Mouth (2017)
"not Chuck and Larry..."  Whatever, you know what I mean."
Big Mouth (2017)
"-[belches] Fuck, I'm drunk. -[mumbles, snores]"
Big Mouth (2017)
"Shh! Shh! Don't wake the kid."
Big Mouth (2017)
"-Okay, where was I? -[man] The Bible."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Right, the Bible."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Okay, so fast-forward, like, a hundred million years,"
Big Mouth (2017)
"and being gay, like... [sputters]"
Big Mouth (2017)
"...gets you in trouble."
Big Mouth (2017)
"For example, there's this dude, Oscar Wilde."
Big Mouth (2017)
"He liked guys,  and they put him in jail for it."
Big Mouth (2017)
"And he's like..."
Big Mouth (2017)
""This is very uncool."
Big Mouth (2017)
"If I'm stuck in here, I can't write Billy Elliot." [chuckles]"
Big Mouth (2017)
"Ay! [groans]"
Big Mouth (2017)
"Are these getting thicker?"
Big Mouth (2017)
"Okay, so they're putting gay people in jail,"
Big Mouth (2017)
"but then in 1969, sexy year, woo-woo..."
Big Mouth (2017)
"all the queers got to go to Stonewall."
Big Mouth (2017)
"And Marsha P. Johnson, she threw out the first pitch."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Gay ball!"
Big Mouth (2017)
"And then the laws started to change, so now we have"
Big Mouth (2017)
"pride parades,"
Big Mouth (2017)
"Drag Race,"
Big Mouth (2017)
"same-sex marriage,"
Big Mouth (2017)
"and now gays can fuck wherever they want."
Big Mouth (2017)
"And that is the story of the first Thanksgiving."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Okay, so you're saying that as a young gay man--"
Big Mouth (2017)
"Who's so hot and who I love so much."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Thank you. …being sexually active is my duty?"
Big Mouth (2017)
"Yes! It's a celebration of your sexual liberation."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Ooh, I just had an idea."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Let's jerk Aiden off!"
Big Mouth (2017)
"Okay."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Come on, say it like you want a dick in your hand."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Okay! Dick!"
Big Mouth (2017)
"[doorbell rings]"
Big Mouth (2017)
"-Hey. -Upstairs, bitch!"
Big Mouth (2017)
"Oh, God, what are you doing?"
Big Mouth (2017)
"Take your pants off! I'm gonna knuckle-shuffle your piss pump!"
Big Mouth (2017)
"-What? -Now spit on his carpet and smile."
Big Mouth (2017)
"[spits]"
Big Mouth (2017)
"What the fuck, babe? You're scaring me. Stop it!"
Big Mouth (2017)
"Nobody said this would be fun!"
Big Mouth (2017)
"It should be fun. Why else would we do it?"
Big Mouth (2017)
"I don't know, because we're gay and we did Stonewall,"
Big Mouth (2017)
"and it's our duty! Right?"
Big Mouth (2017)
"What in the fuck are you talking about?"
Big Mouth (2017)
"Your friends, and how we have to hand-job, and if I don't want to, I'm a prude!"
Big Mouth (2017)
"[chuckles] Okay, my friends are full of shit."
Big Mouth (2017)
"-Broderick hasn't even kissed a boy. -Oh!"
Big Mouth (2017)
"And besides, hand jobs are only fun if both of us are into it."
Big Mouth (2017)
"So, it's okay to wait?"
Big Mouth (2017)
"Of course."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Let's just take the pressure off,"
Big Mouth (2017)
"circle a date on the calendar six months from now,"
Big Mouth (2017)
"and if you're not ready by then,"
Big Mouth (2017)
"I'll kill myself."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Um, can we still make out?"
Big Mouth (2017)
"Sure. And maybe after that, we can clean up the carpet where you spit."
Big Mouth (2017)
"[both laugh]"
Big Mouth (2017)
"Hey, Matthew? Sorry, I know you're busy,"
Big Mouth (2017)
"but can I use "knuckle-shuffle on your piss pump"?"
Big Mouth (2017)
"I wanna put it as my senior quote on my yearbook page."
Big Mouth (2017)
"-[phone chimes] -Oh, my God, isn't he so hot?"
Big Mouth (2017)
"Send him an eggplant and an avocado emoji and say, "Hungry for your cock-amole.""
Big Mouth (2017)
"-Or I could send him a shirtless pic back. -[camera shutter clicks]"
Big Mouth (2017)
""Can't wait to jerk you off on my timetable.""
Big Mouth (2017)
"In the meantime, shall we take a 45-minute shower?"
Big Mouth (2017)
"Oh, ho-ho!  Let's go clog that fucking drain."
Big Mouth (2017)
"[phone chimes]"
Big Mouth (2017)
"Oh my!"
Big Mouth (2017)
"Oh, Jesus on a four-man bobsled!"
Big Mouth (2017)
"[man] Kimberly,  that commercial you like is on!"
Big Mouth (2017)
"The one with Flo!"
Big Mouth (2017)
"-Oh, that Flo! Coming! -[chimes]"
Big Mouth (2017)
"Oh!"
Big Mouth (2017)
"I'll be right there!"
Big Mouth (2017)
"Holy shit."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Ladies, I've decided to do feminism in a way that serves me."
Big Mouth (2017)
"So as long as I'm not touching any penises,"
Big Mouth (2017)
"I'm calling on all of you to boycott boy cock!"
Big Mouth (2017)
"I'm not sure about that slogan."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Nick, should it be "Boycott boy cock" or "Boy cock boycott"?"
Big Mouth (2017)
"Who fucking cares? The world is gonna end."
Big Mouth (2017)
"It sure is. You saw it yourself,"
Big Mouth (2017)
"right after Jessi said you were a bad person who couldn't fuck!"
Big Mouth (2017)
"Uh, Nick, what's going on, buddy? You seem very anxious."
Big Mouth (2017)
"After that fight with Jessi, I had this crazy dream, and now I'm a fucking mess."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Well, if you have access to a hand,"
Big Mouth (2017)
"you might want to try some self-medicating."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Oh, that."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Uh, I'm not very good at that,  I don't think."
Big Mouth (2017)
"You gotta practice, man."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Grind that pepper, give your salad a little kick, baby."
Big Mouth (2017)
"I forgot about this."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Nick, come on. There's nothing to it."
Big Mouth (2017)
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