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Clips from Little Demon - Possession Obsession (S01E01)

"- Wh-what?"
Little Demon
"But I knew him for thousands of years."
Little Demon
"We wrote a series"
Little Demon
"of best-selling mystery novels together."
Little Demon
"- Yeah, it's called a long con."
Little Demon
"- I gave you my family. - And I got rid of them."
Little Demon
"If I had to hear one more boring story"
Little Demon
"from that yak farmer you call a wife--"
Little Demon
"- We were to ride the ashen skies"
Little Demon
"and rule the realms together."
Little Demon
"- There was never a "we.""
Little Demon
"I will be with my daughter, you dumb fuck."
Little Demon
"- [growls, grunts]"
Little Demon
"- Aw, I'm a bad widdle boy."
Little Demon
"AZZY: Unhand me, you cretin."
Little Demon
"I'll get my revenge, Satan. You'll see!"
Little Demon
"You'll all--aah!"
Little Demon
"- Now, let's go boil the babies"
Little Demon
"while their heads are still soft."
Little Demon
"ALL: [cheering]"
Little Demon
"CHRISSY AS CAMRY: We're through, Jason."
Little Demon
"I'm a person, not an appendage."
Little Demon
"STUDENT 1: Yeah, Camry. STUDENT 2: Good for you, girl."
Little Demon
"STUDENT 3: That's what I'm talking about."
Little Demon
"I'm an ally."
Little Demon
"- Let's go unionize the guidance counselors."
Little Demon
"- I'm late for band. But maybe I can come over"
Little Demon
"after my family bike ride after school"
Little Demon
"and we can help people around town?"
Little Demon
"- Like community service?"
Little Demon
"Oh, my God, I'm in!"
Little Demon
"- [sighs]"
Little Demon
"LIBRARIAN: If I wanted to hear about your problems, Sharon,"
Little Demon
"I would have became a therapist not a librarian."
Little Demon
"- One more helping won't hurt."
Little Demon
"CHRISSY AS LIBRARIAN: Just kidding. I'm all ears."
Little Demon
"Lunch is on me."
Little Demon
"Let's kick this hero shit in high gear."
Little Demon
"SINGER: ♪♪ Anytime day or night ♪♪"
Little Demon
"♪♪ You get a little uptight ♪♪"
Little Demon
"♪♪ And you need a little lovin' ♪♪"
Little Demon
"♪♪ To make it all right ♪♪"
Little Demon
"♪♪ Just a phone call has got me running ♪♪"
Little Demon
"♪♪ Honey, hold on, 'cause I'm coming ♪♪"
Little Demon
"♪♪ To give you what you need ♪♪"
Little Demon
"♪♪ Oh, baby ♪♪"
Little Demon
"CHRISSY AS PERSON: Whoa. Whoo-hoo!"
Little Demon
"SINGER: ♪♪ 'Cause love's on the way ♪♪"
Little Demon
"♪♪ And I'm coming ♪♪"
Little Demon
"CHRISSY AS DRIVER: Hello, Middletown."
Little Demon
"I am here to help."
Little Demon
"Pee pee poo poo, y'all!"
Little Demon
"[truck honks]"
Little Demon
"SINGER: ♪♪ Anywhere near or far ♪♪"
Little Demon
"[music winds down]"
Little Demon
"[dramatic music]"
Little Demon
"AZZY AS CHRISSY: Bonjour, Antichrist."
Little Demon
"Now, let's find the gates of Tartarus"
Little Demon
"and begin Maximus Dawnus on our own."
Little Demon
"[laughs evilly]"
Little Demon
"[car honking]"
Little Demon
"LAURA: God damn it."
Little Demon
"[car honks]"
Little Demon
"Chrissy, come on."
Little Demon
"If Tawnee's mom honks again, I will make Tawnee an orphan."
Little Demon
"[soft mystical music]"
Little Demon
"Look, I'm sorry I was harsh before."
Little Demon
"It is my job to look out for you."
Little Demon
"And yeah, sometimes I can be a bit hyperbolic."
Little Demon
"But no harm, no foul,"
Little Demon
"and I'm good to move on if you are."
Little Demon
"- Yes. - Really?"
Little Demon
"- Yes."
Little Demon
"LAURA: I love you, honey."
Little Demon
"- And I love you, Mommy."
Little Demon
"- There's a demon inside my daughter,"
Little Demon
"and I know it's that shitstain's fault."
Little Demon
"So when he gets back, why don't you tell him"
Little Demon
"he's lost visitation rights to everything but my katana?"
Little Demon
"- [speaks language] [drain gurgles]"
Little Demon
"- Don't mean to interrupt,"
Little Demon
"but evil Chrissy just caught a bird and ate it."
Little Demon
"Single motherhood is tough, ain't it?"
Little Demon
"- Blast these inferior human tools."
Little Demon
"LAURA: We gotta get this demon out of Chrissy"
Little Demon
"before it does harm to her body."
Little Demon
"And then I need to find her soul, wherever that is."
Little Demon
"- Oh, we're gonna hustle the demon."
Little Demon
"A little "Color of Money" game. I like it."
Little Demon
"- This is a Soul Stang, Darlene."
Little Demon
"It knocks souls out of bodies"
Little Demon
"with the speed and strength of a Shinkansen bullet train."
Little Demon
"I push, you catch."
Little Demon
"- Ooh, just like at my sister's home birth."
Little Demon
"For the record, I only dropped the baby"
Little Demon
"because the blood made her so slippery."
Little Demon
"Caught the placenta, though."
Little Demon
"- [speaking gibberish]"
Little Demon
"The jar is charged with a binding spell."
Little Demon
"So once the demon is in the lizard--"
Little Demon
"AZZY: Hello, Mommy. DARLENE: [screams]"
Little Demon
"- Hello, my wonderful daughter."
Little Demon
"- Can we drive to these coordinates?"
Little Demon
"- Funch's Diner in Kalamazoo, Michigan?"
Little Demon
"- It's not where the gates of Tartarus"
Little Demon
"are located or anything."
Little Demon
"It's... [laughs]"
Little Demon
"[voice distorts] For Earth history project."
Little Demon
"- We sure can, darling."
Little Demon
"Better go put your head in that bucket of water"
Little Demon
"for 30 seconds, because as we both know,"
Little Demon
"that's what human girls do before a road trip!"
Little Demon
"- [laughs] Yes. We both know this very well."
Little Demon
"♪♪ ♪♪"
Little Demon
"[ball whooshes, shings]"
Little Demon
"- Yello."
Little Demon
"I can just come back in ten, if--"
Little Demon
"LAURA: Stay back! - [screeches]"
Little Demon
"DARLENE: Oh, whoops."
Little Demon
"AZZY: [evil laughter]"
Little Demon
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