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Clips from Cheers - Cliffie's Big Score (S04E04)

Can we talk In the pool room?

"Can we talk In the pool room?"

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No.

"No."

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Carla, that wasn't The favor.

"Carla, that wasn't The favor."

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Sheesh! There's more?

"Sheesh! There's more?"

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What i have to endure!

"What i have to endure!"

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Now...For the kill.

"Now...For the kill."

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Carla...

"Carla..."

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"I, cliff clavin..."

""I, cliff clavin...""

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"Would be ever so honored If you, a lady of...

""Would be ever so honored If you, a lady of..."

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A lady..."

"A lady...""

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"Would accompany me With your presence

""Would accompany me With your presence"

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"At the gala postman's ball On the 18th of this month.

""At the gala postman's ball On the 18th of this month."

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"You'd be doing this Only as a friend.

""You'd be doing this Only as a friend."

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"There is no ulterior motive Or strings attached.

""There is no ulterior motive Or strings attached."

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Thank you for listening."

"Thank you for listening.""

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Carla.

"Carla."

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Carla. Carla.

"Carla. Carla."

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Carla, this is really Important to me.

"Carla, this is really Important to me."

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I know.

"I know."

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But think of me.

"But think of me."

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Look, carla, You don't have to Dance with me,

"Look, carla, You don't have to Dance with me,"

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And i'll Buy you a dress.

"And i'll Buy you a dress."

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Nah.

"Nah."

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A corsage.

"A corsage."

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100 Bucks!

"100 Bucks!"

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Nah.

"Nah."

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A vcr!

"A vcr!"

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A vcr?

"A vcr?"

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Nice touch, But i'll have to pass.

"Nice touch, But i'll have to pass."

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Oh...

"Oh..."

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Good lord! Is that a tear?

"Good lord! Is that a tear?"

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Uhh!

"Uhh!"

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I think my greed Is overcoming Your repulsiveness.

"I think my greed Is overcoming Your repulsiveness."

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I'll go.

"I'll go."

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You'll go? Oh, carla--

"You'll go? Oh, carla--"

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First rule-- No physical contact Of any kind.

"First rule-- No physical contact Of any kind."

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But, carla, I'm so happy, i got To hug something.

"But, carla, I'm so happy, i got To hug something."

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Ok, you can hug me...

"Ok, you can hug me..."

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For 5 bucks.

"For 5 bucks."

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That's it.

"That's it."

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My pleasure.

"My pleasure."

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Well, i got a date With carla.

"Well, i got a date With carla."

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Seriously?

"Seriously?"

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Are you kidding?

"Are you kidding?"

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She fell for me Like a sack of cannolis.

"She fell for me Like a sack of cannolis."

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You got to love them, The little wenches.

"You got to love them, The little wenches."

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Oh, clifford, May i speak with You for a moment?

"Oh, clifford, May i speak with You for a moment?"

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Certainly, diane.

"Certainly, diane."

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I've been Thinking about it,

"I've been Thinking about it,"

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And i've Decided to break My engagement

"And i've Decided to break My engagement"

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And join you In your evening Of triumph.

"And join you In your evening Of triumph."

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You'll go with me?

"You'll go with me?"

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I wouldn't miss it For the world.

"I wouldn't miss it For the world."

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Normie... Norm, Did you hear that?

"Normie... Norm, Did you hear that?"

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Diane will go to The ball with me.

"Diane will go to The ball with me."

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I'm taking diane To the ball!

"I'm taking diane To the ball!"

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Cliff. Cliff, Think just a minute, now.

"Cliff. Cliff, Think just a minute, now."

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What's wrong With this picture?

"What's wrong With this picture?"

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Sam, change For a 20.

"Sam, change For a 20."

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What are you Talking about?

"What are you Talking about?"

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Oh. Yeah. I forgot.

"Oh. Yeah. I forgot."

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I'll just have To have a huddle With the man

"I'll just have To have a huddle With the man"

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Who knows almost As much about Women as i do.

"Who knows almost As much about Women as i do."

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Sammy...

"Sammy..."

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Mm-hmm? Yeah?

"Mm-hmm? Yeah?"

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A word, If you will.

"A word, If you will."

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What's up?

"What's up?"

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I seem to have one of Those situations again--

"I seem to have one of Those situations again--"

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You know, two dollies lined up For the same evening.

"You know, two dollies lined up For the same evening."

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Does this Have to do with

"Does this Have to do with"

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Diane, carla, and That postman thing?

"Diane, carla, and That postman thing?"

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Yeah.

"Yeah."

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Well, fair's fair. Who said yes first?

"Well, fair's fair. Who said yes first?"

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Carla.

"Carla."

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Well, you just have To tell diane you Can't go with her.

"Well, you just have To tell diane you Can't go with her."

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Make up some excuse.

"Make up some excuse."

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Tell her that Your girl cousin From michigan

"Tell her that Your girl cousin From michigan"

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Is in town just for The day, and that You got to take her.

"Is in town just for The day, and that You got to take her."

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No, wait a minute.

"No, wait a minute."

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No, she's already Heard that one.

"No, she's already Heard that one."

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Clifford, i've been Thinking--

"Clifford, i've been Thinking--"

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You can't go, huh, diane? Hey, i understand.

"You can't go, huh, diane? Hey, i understand."

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Honestly, You're so insecure.

"Honestly, You're so insecure."

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I was going to say That i've thought of

"I was going to say That i've thought of"

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The perfect dress To wear,

"The perfect dress To wear,"

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A sassy little Strapless number,

"A sassy little Strapless number,"

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Very graceful For dancing,

"Very graceful For dancing,"

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With my hair up and A hint of jewelry To catch the eye.

"With my hair up and A hint of jewelry To catch the eye."

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I'm going to Make you very proud.

"I'm going to Make you very proud."

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Now what, sammy?

"Now what, sammy?"

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This is a tough one.

"This is a tough one."

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If carla finds out You asked Diane first,

"If carla finds out You asked Diane first,"

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You're going to Be dead before you Hit the ground.

"You're going to Be dead before you Hit the ground."

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Hey, hold on A minute.

"Hey, hold on A minute."

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All you got to do Is find carla Another date--

"All you got to do Is find carla Another date--"

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Someone Better than you.

"Someone Better than you."

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Hey, sammy, sammy, You are a genius.

"Hey, sammy, sammy, You are a genius."

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Well, thank you.

"Well, thank you."

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Listen, when you talk To her about the guy,

"Listen, when you talk To her about the guy,"

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Be vague, be general.

"Be vague, be general."

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Don't get locked Into anybody specific.

"Don't get locked Into anybody specific."

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Right. Vague. General.

"Right. Vague. General."

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Carla? Uh... How would you like to go

"Carla? Uh... How would you like to go"

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To the postman's ball With a guy who looks Like robert redford

"To the postman's ball With a guy who looks Like robert redford"

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And drives a porsche?

"And drives a porsche?"

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Why aren't i Going with you?

"Why aren't i Going with you?"

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Well, there's this buddy Of mine down at the p.O.--

"Well, there's this buddy Of mine down at the p.O.--"

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You might've Seen him in here.

"You might've Seen him in here."

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He's been in A couple of times.

"He's been in A couple of times."

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Well, son of a gun If he didn't say he's Got a big crush on you.

"Well, son of a gun If he didn't say he's Got a big crush on you."

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And, well, he wanted me To see if you'd go To the ball with him.

"And, well, he wanted me To see if you'd go To the ball with him."

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This isn't just some Way of getting out

"This isn't just some Way of getting out"

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Of giving me The vcr, is it?

"Of giving me The vcr, is it?"

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No. No, no, no.

"No. No, no, no."

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You'll get Everything i promised.

"You'll get Everything i promised."

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Plus, the bonus Of not having to Go out with you,

"Plus, the bonus Of not having to Go out with you,"

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Which leads me to Believe that this guy

"Which leads me to Believe that this guy"

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Is a bigger loser Than you are.

"Is a bigger loser Than you are."

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Just forget it, clavin!

"Just forget it, clavin!"

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What kind of girl Do you think i am?

"What kind of girl Do you think i am?"

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