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Clips from Human Resources (2022) - It's Almost Over (S01E01)

"You can do this."
Human Resources (2022)
"No one's thinking about how you freaked out on Rochelle,"
Human Resources (2022)
"turned into a giant Hateworm, and rained vomit all over your coworkers."
Human Resources (2022)
"-People have their own lives. -Whoa! She showed up!"
Human Resources (2022)
"-How shameful."
Human Resources (2022)
"Okay, I'm here with Emmy Fairfax, the office hot mess."
Human Resources (2022)
"Emmy, I am obsessed with your commitment to ruining your own life."
Human Resources (2022)
"What's next for everyone's favorite embarrassing idiot?"
Human Resources (2022)
"What is this? Why do you have a microphone?"
Human Resources (2022)
"Oh, uh, well, because I'm the gossip correspondent for Connielingus Tonight."
Human Resources (2022)
"Maury, I'm sorry to interrupt your interview with the Princess of Puke,"
Human Resources (2022)
"-but I've got a hot couple alert!"
Human Resources (2022)
"-"
Human Resources (2022)
"Oh, wow, this is a real treat for me."
Human Resources (2022)
"I have to pretend to like interviewing people like Emmy,"
Human Resources (2022)
"but with you two, the hard-on is real."
Human Resources (2022)
"Aw, you're sweet."
Human Resources (2022)
"Rochelle, Dante, what's it like being workplace royalty?"
Human Resources (2022)
"I'm just glad I could bring home the Dolly for the whole office."
Human Resources (2022)
"Come on, smoking hot and a team player? Let's hear it for my girl!"
Human Resources (2022)
"Can you believe this shit?"
Human Resources (2022)
"I know. Just ignore it."
Human Resources (2022)
"They're basically rubbing it in our faces."
Human Resources (2022)
"I mean, they are fucking tea-bagging us with their love."
Human Resources (2022)
"Rochelle clearly sees something in Dante no one else does."
Human Resources (2022)
"Like, absolutely no one."
Human Resources (2022)
"Well, don't forget, he does have three dicks."
Human Resources (2022)
"-How could I forget?"
Human Resources (2022)
"It's all anybody ever talks about!"
Human Resources (2022)
"-But, of course, I don't care."
Human Resources (2022)
"Coming up next, Janelle Monáe sings a song"
Human Resources (2022)
"while we look at a list of actors I've done butt-stuff with."
Human Resources (2022)
"Please, Mama, you have to eat!"
Human Resources (2022)
"No! I'm hot. I want candy."
Human Resources (2022)
"What's wrong with these people?"
Human Resources (2022)
"Your mother loves candy. Just give her what she loves!"
Human Resources (2022)
"But, Walter, old ladies can't survive on candy alone."
Human Resources (2022)
"-No one asked you, bitch."
Human Resources (2022)
"-Mama, please. -No!"
Human Resources (2022)
"Amir, she needs professional care."
Human Resources (2022)
"Excuse me, don't talk about Yara like she's not even here!"
Human Resources (2022)
"You know I love your mother, but we can't give her the help she needs."
Human Resources (2022)
"She doesn't want help, she wants candy."
Human Resources (2022)
"At this point, we'd even take raisins, and raisins fucking suck!"
Human Resources (2022)
"I'm not letting my poor mama"
Human Resources (2022)
"go back to that home after they let her break her hip."
Human Resources (2022)
"That's right, big guy."
Human Resources (2022)
"We're making sound decisions based on facts,"
Human Resources (2022)
"not rash emotional impulses."
Human Resources (2022)
"Exactly! You're my rock."
Human Resources (2022)
"But, Dad, Teta doesn't even know who we are."
Human Resources (2022)
"-She's just old, Natalie. -And she's terrifying!"
Human Resources (2022)
"She deserves your respect."
Human Resources (2022)
"Last night, I got up to get water"
Human Resources (2022)
"and she was just sitting in the dark combing Nadja's old Bratz dolls."
Human Resources (2022)
"They had a job interview."
Human Resources (2022)
"How dare you?"
Human Resources (2022)
"Do you know how many oceans this queen had to cross"
Human Resources (2022)
"to give your family life and liberty and the pursuit of happiness?"
Human Resources (2022)
"One! But it was a big one, you ungrateful shit rat!"
Human Resources (2022)
"Walter, can you please take it down a notch"
Human Resources (2022)
"and help get your client to eat some soup?"
Human Resources (2022)
"She doesn't want soup, she wants candy!"
Human Resources (2022)
"She is a grown woman, she can't have candy for dinner."
Human Resources (2022)
"-I'm just trying to be a good son. -I know."
Human Resources (2022)
"But you're not the one dealing with her…"
Human Resources (2022)
"-…poo-poos. -Oh, my God."
Human Resources (2022)
"Are you talking about wiping Grandma's ass?"
Human Resources (2022)
"I'm hot."
Human Resources (2022)
"Oh, please. You've seen one tush, you've seen them all."
Human Resources (2022)
"-Uh, Dad? -I'm on poo-poo duty from now on."
Human Resources (2022)
"-Dad! -Mama! Mama, where's your shirt?"
Human Resources (2022)
"I was hot."
Human Resources (2022)
"Honey, they're gorgeous, but let's cover them up, okay?"
Human Resources (2022)
"-Knock, knock! -Who's there?"
Human Resources (2022)
"Oh, it's not a joke, just something I have to say because of my tiny arms."
Human Resources (2022)
"-Well, what do you want? -The tube said I'm off Yara's team."
Human Resources (2022)
"-What? -Yeah!"
Human Resources (2022)
"At first, I thought it was because I was doing a bad job,"
Human Resources (2022)
"but what a relief, she's just dying!"
Human Resources (2022)
"How in the hell is that a relief?"
Human Resources (2022)
"Because there's so much she doesn't need to worry about anymore."
Human Resources (2022)
"But Yara can't die! She's… She's not ready!"
Human Resources (2022)
"I don't know. Everyone else is leaving too."
Human Resources (2022)
"Her Ambition Gremlin, her Appetite Sprite, her Bladder Badger."
Human Resources (2022)
"What? Am I the last one on her team?"
Human Resources (2022)
"No! No, that's impossible!"
Human Resources (2022)
"Hey, man, I don't think I've ever said this before,"
Human Resources (2022)
"but you need to relax or you're gonna die too, like Yara."
Human Resources (2022)
"Well, you need to get the fuck out of my office!"
Human Resources (2022)
"Hey! You're not supposed to have a fly-swatter at work!"
Human Resources (2022)
"-That's an OSHA violation! -Get out! Shoo!"
Human Resources (2022)
"Okay, here are a few best practices for taking care of an elderly parent."
Human Resources (2022)
"-One, keep your parent active and engaged."
Human Resources (2022)
"-Stretching is a must. -Up, down."
Human Resources (2022)
"Be careful with her, you brute! She could shatter!"
Human Resources (2022)
"Two, don't be afraid to ask for help when necessary."
Human Resources (2022)
"Nabilah!"
Human Resources (2022)
"-Ugh."
Human Resources (2022)
"And, finally, make decisions that make life easier for everyone involved."
Human Resources (2022)
"This sweat suit is a sweet-suit. Loose elastic for comfy times."
Human Resources (2022)
"No, no, no. Yara doesn't belong in a sweat suit."
Human Resources (2022)
"-Aw, I think she looks nice. -You've stripped her of her style."
Human Resources (2022)
"She used to dress in Chanel, and now she looks like The Irishman."
Human Resources (2022)
"-Okay, Mama, time for breakfast."
Human Resources (2022)
"I want candy."
Human Resources (2022)
"We all want candy!"
Human Resources (2022)
"Think I like Kashi Good Friends cereal?"
Human Resources (2022)
"You know, up where I live,"
Human Resources (2022)
"I'm on the box of Kashi Good Friends cereal."
Human Resources (2022)
"Pete, how are you feeling?"
Human Resources (2022)
"-Oh! Holy hell! Can I help you? -Actually, I'm here to help you."
Human Resources (2022)
"I'm Keith from Grief."
Human Resources (2022)
"I hear your client has a parent on the way out."
Human Resources (2022)
"I am so sad to hear. Here's my card."
Human Resources (2022)
"Yeah, I'm sorry, Keith from Grief, but now's not a good time."
Human Resources (2022)
"It never is."
Human Resources (2022)
"Hey, maybe Amir and I could just sit down?"
Human Resources (2022)
"Have a… a little chat over some tea, a light lunch, perhaps?"
Human Resources (2022)
"It seems like he could use a very warm cashmere hug."
Human Resources (2022)
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