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Clips from Derry Girls - Episode #1.6 (S01E01)

"Orla has got really into step aerobics."
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"Her instructor says she's a natural."
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"Says she's got what it takes to go all the way."
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"All the way in step aerobics?"
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"But it's out of control now, Mary."
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"She's stepping morning, noon and night."
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"Apart from anything else, it's dangerous."
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"She nearly came through the ceiling yesterday."
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"OK, she might be gifted, but I just want her to have a normal childhood."
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"- I won't give it up. I can't. - Listen to yourself, love."
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"Now, whites."
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"I've got my eye on you, boy."
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"- Jesus, Joe. - What are you doing here?"
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"Meeting your fancy woman, I suppose."
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"No, I'm not. I'm collecting Mary's photographs."
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"And if I was having an illicit rendezvous with my mistress,"
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"I'm not sure that the supermarket that my father-in-law is"
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"doing the big shop in would be the best place for it, really."
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"- Quinn, you said? - That's right."
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"- Here we go. - Great."
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"That'll be £3.75, please. And have you got your wee docket there?"
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"- Yeah, I do. - It's a wee red slip of paper, about yay big."
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"- Yeah. - Dark blue lettering, it has."
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"- Yeah, I know. - Not a navy blue, now. More like a royal blue."
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"I know what it looks like."
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"Times New Roman, I believe the font is called."
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"- I just can't find it. - Prick."
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"Er, look, I'm sorry. Do you absolutely need it?"
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"I'm afraid I do, sir, yes. Proof of ID."
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"But you have my surname written on it there."
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"How do I know that's your surname?"
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"Because I just told you it was my surname."
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"- You could be lying. - Why would I lie?"
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"To get your hands on someone else's photos."
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"Why would I want somebody else's photos?"
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"Like, who would pay for somebody else's photos?"
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"- Stalker, maybe. - Yeah, exactly. Very good, sir."
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"- A stalker. - I'm not a stalker. - Look,"
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"why don't you just go home and have a wee look for your wee docket?"
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"No. This is ridiculous."
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"Just open that up and take out one of the photos."
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"You see? That's me wife there."
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"How do I know you're not just telling me that?"
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"Cos that's me standing beside her."
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"I suppose you do look a bit like this man."
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"- I am this man. - It could be you."
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"It's definitely me."
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"My name is Gerry Quinn. This is my father-in-law, Joe."
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"He can vouch for me."
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"I've never seen this man before in my life."
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"No docket, no photographs."
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"Great."
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"Ten copies of each, please, and Jenny wants a tea."
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"OK, guys."
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"Don't forget, entries for our searching for myself"
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"writing competition are to be"
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"placed here. If you could all spread the word,"
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"- that'd be fabby-dabby-do. - Fabby-dabby-dick."
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"Can I have your attention, please, ladies? Get down. Get down."
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"I've just received a phone call from Louise Kerr's mother,"
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"and it's not looking great."
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"Oh, God, I just can't believe it."
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"It's unlikely she'll be returning to school before the end of the year,"
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"- so I think the only thing we can do now is... - Pray for her?"
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"No. What use would that do?"
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"No, I think the best thing"
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"we can do is decide who will fulfil the role of editor now."
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"Sister Michael, some of us have actually"
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"already discussed this eventuality, and the thing is, well,"
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"nobody is comfortable stepping into Louise's shoes."
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"It feels a bit, sort of, disrespectful."
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"We think this issue should be cancelled."
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"Well, fair enough, if nobody is willing"
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"- to take her place. - I'll do it. - Excuse me?"
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"I'll take her place. I'll step into her shoes. I'll do it."
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"- Really? - Absolutely."
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"No, you can't."
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"We're making a statement. You're ruining our statement."
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"Look, girls, I know Louise meant a lot to you all."
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"- She's not dead, Erin. - Well, not yet."
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"Hopefully she won't, you know, die,"
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"but if she does, the show must go on."
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"- Isn't that right, Sister Michael? - You terrify me."
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"You can't be the editor."
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"You've never even written an article, Erin."
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"That's because I can't get anything past Rupert Murdoch"
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"- over there. - This isn't fair. You can't let it happen, Sister."
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"I know, but I'm bored now,"
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"so it looks like I probably will. Good luck, all."
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"How could you have lost the wee docket, Gerry?"
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"Aye, everybody knows you have to hang on to the wee docket."
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"Look, I've said that I'm sorry."
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"They were my birthday photos, for God's sake."
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"There's definitely grounds for an annulment here, Mary."
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"I mean you only turn 33 once."
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"You've been 33 a few times now, in fairness, Mary."
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"Well, aren't you a brave man, given the circumstances?"
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"Mary, come on. Would you not reconsider?"
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"- No, Da. - Please, love."
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"- Just the once. - I'm not letting you hit him, Da."
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"I'm devastated. That was"
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"when I lost the half-stone doing the Rosemary Conley as well."
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"My collar bone was sort of poking through my skin."
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"- Do you remember, Mary? - Aye, you were far too thin, Sarah."
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"No, it was. It was brilliant, and now I haven't got"
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"so much as a photograph to look back on."
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"Look, it's gone. The docket is gone. Why don't we just move on?"
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"Why don't you just move out?"
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"Guess who's been made editor of the school magazine!"
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"Me! I have. Can you believe it?"
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"Oh, Christ. My whites."
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"I think I know what happened to the wee docket."
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"Dick."
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"Good morning, team!"
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"- Where is everyone? - They quit. - What? You're not serious."
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"They all think what you did was pretty out of order, Erin."
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"- I see. - And that you're a bit ruthless."
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"- OK. - And cold. - Right."
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"And nobody really has any respect for you."
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"Yes, all right, thank you."
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