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Clips from The Great North - Say It Again, Ham Adventure (S02E02)

"Sorry, but we leave our guns in the glovebox,"
The Great North
"like we're supposed to."
The Great North
"Oh, yeah. I haven't handled a gun"
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"since the gun-training puppet taught me"
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"how to take off the safety."
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"Ya beep, and ya boop, and you're ready to shoot."
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"But only if it's a life-or-death situation."
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"I'm not even interested in killing you guys,"
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"but you're kind of leaving me no choice here."
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"What I am interested in is those haircuts."
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"Did you lose a bet, or are you just very brave?"
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"I can't believe I'm saying this,"
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"but can you be nice to these police ladies?"
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"- You suck. - Shh! It's too much talking."
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"Kesha's cursed Kit Kat, I don't want to die young."
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"What are you... what are you doing?"
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"Sorry, sorry, I'm not trying to get away."
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"I just have major pins and needles. Ugh."
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"Stop moving in that annoying way and get back down on the ground."
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"Hmm?"
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"- Gotcha. - Aah!"
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"Great job, sis. A classic tap and turn."
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"Yeah, I was gonna do "there's something on your shirt,""
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"but it just doesn't seem like"
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"this lady eats anything with sauce."
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"Ugh, well, darn it all, you really did get me."
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"I did not see that coming, and not only because I was"
The Great North
"sort of looking away because I find your face unpleasant."
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"You know what else you might find unpleasant?"
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"Three years at the Orca Bay Correctional Facility."
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"Actually, it's very comfortable."
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"They have a Wetzel's Pretzels in the cafeteria."
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"So, you guys are positive"
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"Cousin Danica isn't the Orca Bay Slicer?"
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"Sorry, the Orca Bay Slicer confessed many years ago."
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"Was kind of a big deal."
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"And she prefers to be called Nancy McCamden now."
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"Well, Crap-lombo, looks like we didn't finish reading"
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"the Wikipedia page, Honeybee."
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"We must have gotten a little too excited"
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"and forgotten to scroll all the way down."
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"Don't worry, though."
The Great North
"I'm sure A.J. Dossier accidentally investigated"
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"a bunch of closed cases at the beginning of his career."
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"Onwards!"
The Great North
"Wait, so what did Cousin Danica do?"
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"- She robbed a bunch of banks. - But I had a good reason."
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"Well, as long as you had a good reason."
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"Well, I did for the first one."
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"I'd gotten fired by a hot dog restaurant,"
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"and my home was about to be foreclosed on."
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"The second time, it was because I was bored."
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"And after that, I just, eh, caught the bug."
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"All right, off I go to jail."
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"Guys, I'm really sorry about today."
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"We only ended up here because I thought"
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"I wanted a big, dramatic coming-out,"
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"and then look at all the real-life drama"
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"I accidentally got us into."
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"Funny, as I was preparing for possible death,"
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"I realized something."
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"I've already had the perfect kind of coming-out."
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"Many times."
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"The kind that doesn't faze my family."
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"Not even a little bit."
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"Ham, I'm sorry that I never made a bigger moment"
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"out of what was admittedly a very big moment."
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"If I ever seemed too casual,"
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"it's just because I was afraid of making it seem"
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"like a big deal in a negative way."
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"I can't go back in time, son,"
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"but maybe we can make it up to you."
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"Places, people."
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"Good evening, esteemed family."
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"I look forward to socializing"
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"with you all, but first..."
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"♪ Could everyone please come to a standstill? ♪"
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"Even the bird on the windowsill ♪"
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"Because I have something to say ♪"
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"I am gay ♪"
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"Gasp."
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"Now please burst into tears ♪"
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"Oh, no, I feel faint from this news ♪"
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"My head might drop off ♪"
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"♪ I must hold on to my shoes for I fear they'll pop off ♪"
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"♪ Well, well, well, I simply can't believe it ♪"
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"This information is so shocking ♪"
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"I just can't receive it ♪"
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"So, what kind of gay are you?"
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"A bear, a pear, a man in the chair? ♪"
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"♪ An otter, a squatter, a French debonair? ♪"
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"A dancer, a prancer, a Marcia, a Jan? ♪"
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"And which one of you is the man? ♪"
The Great North
"That was very offensive, you guys. Thank you."
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"I did it, I came out ♪"
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"♪ I said it out loud and I kicked all the shame out ♪"
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"Baby, you were a star."
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"And sorry, but I just have to say it."
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"We love you just the way that you are. ♪"
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"So you want to go out for an afternoon trot?"
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"MAN 2: And you want to be heard"
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"like a herd of bison, heard a lot?"
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"Throw on some Cl'jogs before you hit the town."
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"The sound, it's deafening when they pound, pound, pound."
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"MAN 1: 2,000 years of Dutch innovation..."
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"MAN 2: Meets running shoe technology"
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"developed by our lead clog scientist Nathan."
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"MAN 1: ClogWizard.biz called us"
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"the third-best running clog in the nation."
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"So throw on some Cl'jogs before you hit the town."
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"The sound, it's deafening when they pound, pound, pound."
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"MAN 2: Cl'jogs have a world of loud adventure in store."
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"MAN 1: For Cl'jogging memories galore."
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"Captioned by Media Access Group at WGBH"
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