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Clips from The Great North - Say It Again, Ham Adventure (S02E02)

""Ooh, I'm pink. Look at me.""
The Great North
"Now, I'm cooking a roast, and until it's ready,"
The Great North
"I thought we might just sit here."
The Great North
"Judy, are those leggings something"
The Great North
"you must wear for a medical reason,"
The Great North
"- or are you just a big old floozy? - A floozy?"
The Great North
"Yes, a loose lady, a good-time gal, a harlot?"
The Great North
"In short, a total sleazebag?"
The Great North
"Wow, I've never been so insulted."
The Great North
"This is kind of fun."
The Great North
"So, how's school?"
The Great North
"- Are any of you reading yet? - Nope."
The Great North
"Keep your hands off"
The Great North
"my ceramic rabbit collection."
The Great North
"But there's just one."
The Great North
"There's also just one Lincoln Memorial."
The Great North
"Seems a little different"
The Great North
"and also not a collection, but okay."
The Great North
"Ham, I simply must ask you, what's with the long hair?"
The Great North
"Are you gonna sell it to buy drugs?"
The Great North
"On our way to do real-life field work."
The Great North
"The Orca Bay Slicer is not gonna know what hit her."
The Great North
"We're like Starsky and Hutch."
The Great North
"Or SVU's Mariska Hargitay and..."
The Great North
"the guy with the long neck who helps SVU's Mariska Hargitay."
The Great North
"Christopher Meloni. God, I admire that gorgeous,"
The Great North
"crime-fighting giraffe."
The Great North
"Anyway, should we go over what we know so far?"
The Great North
"Oh, yeah, we should record it,"
The Great North
"and we can use it on our first episode."
The Great North
"The Orca Bay Slicer was like"
The Great North
"a lot of serial killers except for one thing:"
The Great North
"her signature crotch hot dog."
The Great North
"Why are you talking in that weird voice?"
The Great North
"It's my podcaster voice."
The Great North
"Ooh, I want to try a podcaster voice. Okay."
The Great North
"The Orca Bay Slicer is"
The Great North
"one of Alaska's only female serial killers."
The Great North
"Oh, Australian. I love it."
The Great North
"You can throw your voice on my barbie anytime."
The Great North
"Wolf, that was a British accent."
The Great North
"Oh, uh, then I meant"
The Great North
"you can throw your voice on my parliament anytime."
The Great North
"There you go, babe."
The Great North
"I can't tell you how much I enjoy sitting in silence."
The Great North
"- Cousin Danica... - Okay, I guess we're talking again."
The Great North
"Go on, son."
The Great North
"There's something I need to tell you, as family."
The Great North
"It's a secret that's been weighing on me"
The Great North
"ever since I met you an hour ago."
The Great North
"It's just that, Cousin Danica,"
The Great North
"you should know that I am..."
The Great North
"Danica Tobin, come out with your hands up."
The Great North
"- Oh, no. - ...gay."
The Great North
"Well, I guess I ought to tell you all the truth"
The Great North
"about who I really am."
The Great North
"Actually, that's what I was doing."
The Great North
"If you could just wait a second"
The Great North
"while I tell you who I really am."
The Great North
"That's the reason why we're here."
The Great North
"I am wanted by the police for crimes."
The Great North
"I simply can't believe it."
The Great North
"- I'm shocked. - Did my shoes pop off?"
The Great North
"Thank you for sharing your truth with us, Danica."
The Great North
"That was very brave."
The Great North
"So, here's what I think we should do."
The Great North
"I'll open the door to talk to the policewoman"
The Great North
"and you guys tell her that you got here last night."
The Great North
"You know, like an alibi."
The Great North
"Oh, and if they ask you why"
The Great North
"you didn't bring any luggage with you,"
The Great North
"you'll just say, "Because we're disgusting."
The Great North
"We wear the same underwear all the time, every day." Okay?"
The Great North
"As much as we would love to lie to the authorities"
The Great North
"on your behalf, I don't think we will."
The Great North
"It's probably time for us to get going."
The Great North
"I hate to do this, Beef,"
The Great North
"but you're not going anywhere."
The Great North
"Except to the cellar, as my hostages."
The Great North
"At first, I was like, "Her vibe is off,""
The Great North
"but now I'm like, "Her vibe is way off.""
The Great North
"If we want to solve the Orca Bay Slicer case,"
The Great North
"we need to think inside the bun,"
The Great North
"by eating some hot dogs she might have eaten."
The Great North
"Or tossed in her victims' crotches as a calling card."
The Great North
"Oh, yeah. Our perp definitely spent some time here."
The Great North
"This place is creep city."
The Great North
"I'll grab us a table while you go order us"
The Great North
"some research hot dogs-- for research."
The Great North
"As I sat in my booth at The Sausage Lynx,"
The Great North
"I couldn't help but wonder, did the Orca Bay Slicer sit here?"
The Great North
"And if so, did she order the Greek Goddess Dog"
The Great North
"with kalamata olives and feta cheese?"
The Great North
"Wolf, make sure to get the Greek Goddess Dog."
The Great North
"- I got to know if it's good. - Ten-four. Hello."
The Great North
"Could we please have two Greek Goddess Dogs"
The Great North
"and four Hot Dog the Yummy Hunters?"
The Great North
"That'll be $28.64."
The Great North
"So, uh, we're here investigating the Orca Bay Slicer case."
The Great North
"You ever sell a hot dog to a murderer?"
The Great North
"I don't know. Maybe."
The Great North
"Was it a woman? And was she clutching"
The Great North
"a gigantic kitchen knife and saying,"
The Great North
""He's gonna get it"? Anything like that?"
The Great North
"No, but we had someone abuse the mustard station once."
The Great North
"That's why we keep the packets behind the counter now."
The Great North
"Are you, by any chance, the Orca Bay Slicer?"
The Great North
"- No. - Worth a shot."
The Great North
"Oh, are you related to Danica Tobin?"
The Great North
"Now, don't touch anything or move anything around."
The Great North
"You can look at the TV, but don't change the channel."
The Great North
"Or you can look at the adult coloring books,"
The Great North
"but don't color in them."
The Great North
"Place your phones in this Longaberger basket,"
The Great North
"and I'll be on my way."
The Great North
"Gently. Don't hurt the basket."
The Great North
"Please, Danica, just let us go."
The Great North
"Well, you could've given me an alibi,"
The Great North
"so this is all your own fault."
The Great North
"And those pillow covers are new."
The Great North
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