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Clips from Family Guy - Christmas Crime (S20E20)

"♪ O come, let us adore... ♪"
Family Guy
"The "penis" is right,"
Family Guy
"I do miss my family."
Family Guy
"Oh, my God, what have I done?"
Family Guy
"I've been so blind."
Family Guy
"Sure, Christmas is a commercial holiday largely intended"
Family Guy
"to prop up a faltering economy, but it's also about family"
Family Guy
"and togetherness and the Hallmark Channel,"
Family Guy
"which I admit I watch all the time!"
Family Guy
"Oh, my God, I love Christmas!"
Family Guy
"(sobbing)"
Family Guy
"NARRATOR: And what happened then?"
Family Guy
"Well, in prison they say,"
Family Guy
"Brian's anus grew three sizes that day."
Family Guy
"Brian... you are free to go."
Family Guy
"What? What do you mean?"
Family Guy
"I just wanted you to learn that while you thought"
Family Guy
"it was everyone else who'd lost the true meaning of Christmas,"
Family Guy
"it was actually you all along."
Family Guy
"So why don't you head outside to your family?"
Family Guy
"I will."
Family Guy
"But first there's something I've got to do."
Family Guy
"Ah?"
Family Guy
"It's like you killed Him all over again."
Family Guy
"Oh, Brian, it's good to have you back."
Family Guy
"It wasn't Christmas without you."
Family Guy
"I'm happy to be back."
Family Guy
"And I'm happy to have my tennis ball."
Family Guy
"(growls)"
Family Guy
"Meg? Lois? You got any more passwords?"
Family Guy
"The panda loves 'em."
Family Guy
"(blipping)"
Family Guy
"The Griffin assets, sir."
Family Guy
"At last. $17?"
Family Guy
"The bear cost $23 to make."
Family Guy
"Oh, no."
Family Guy
"PETER: Can't rob America if America's broke!"
Family Guy
"Merry Christmas, everyone!"
Family Guy
"♪ It seems today that all you see ♪"
Family Guy
"♪ Is violence in movies and sex on TV ♪"
Family Guy
"♪ But where are those good old‐fashioned values ♪"
Family Guy
"♪ On which we used to rely? ♪"
Family Guy
"♪ Lucky there's a family guy ♪"
Family Guy
"♪ Lucky there's a man who positively can do ♪"
Family Guy
"♪ All the things that make us ♪"
Family Guy
"♪ Laugh and cry ♪"
Family Guy
"♪ He's... a... Fam... ily... Guy! ♪"
Family Guy
"♪ ♪"
Family Guy
"ANNOUNCER: Hey, kids, don't be left out"
Family Guy
"this Christmas‐‐ top your wish list with"
Family Guy
"the toy of the season, Happy Asking Panda!"
Family Guy
"Made in China, Happy Asking Panda has"
Family Guy
"many questions for you."
Family Guy
"What is your favorite color?"
Family Guy
"What is your parents' political affiliation?"
Family Guy
"What is your approximate household income?"
Family Guy
"All of these questions and so many more!"
Family Guy
"His eyes light up when he's happy,"
Family Guy
"or when credit cards are held in front of him!"
Family Guy
"Hold Happy Asking Panda over the keyboard"
Family Guy
"while entering passwords and watch him dance."
Family Guy
"I love you, Happy Asking Panda!"
Family Guy
"PANDA: Upload complete!"
Family Guy
"Order today and it will arrive"
Family Guy
"for happy American Christmas and time of wonder."
Family Guy
"I must."
Family Guy
"Have. That. Toy."
Family Guy
"What, are you serious?"
Family Guy
"Of course I'm serious, I'm a child"
Family Guy
"and I just saw a commercial!"
Family Guy
"Or maybe you don't want me to have"
Family Guy
"a happy American Christmas."
Family Guy
"Of course I do. But do you really not"
Family Guy
"see that you're crassly manifesting"
Family Guy
"the very consumerism on which Christmas is built?"
Family Guy
"Chris, can you please put the dog out?"
Family Guy
"Yes, sir!"
Family Guy
"(grunts)"
Family Guy
"Thank you, Chris."
Family Guy
"Hey!"
Family Guy
"It's very cold out here."
Family Guy
"Okay, everyone, time to leave for the traditional"
Family Guy
"town tree lighting ceremony."
Family Guy
"What's happening now? I can't hear her."
Family Guy
"Sweet. Tree lighting."
Family Guy
"(clucks tongue) Guess that means it's showtime."
Family Guy
"Wait, what is this?"
Family Guy
"Oh, nothing."
Family Guy
"Just my own tradition"
Family Guy
"of putting four dozen hard‐boiled eggs"
Family Guy
"in a Kroger bag and passing them out at the tree lighting."
Family Guy
"Okay, we get it, Meg, you're dark and different."
Family Guy
"Wow, Meg really is dark and different."
Family Guy
"Yeah, they call me "Meg the Egg.""
Family Guy
"'Cause of my big bag of eggs."
Family Guy
"(chuckles) I hope you guys don't start calling me that,"
Family Guy
"but you can if you want to."
Family Guy
"Oh, is this the "Meg the Egg" thing?"
Family Guy
"Yeah, no one's on board with that."
Family Guy
"Whoa, Quahog!"
Family Guy
"Whoa, there! Whoa!"
Family Guy
"Whoa."
Family Guy
"Welcome, one and all,"
Family Guy
"to the annual tree lighting ceremony."
Family Guy
"All right, Meg the Egg!"
Family Guy
"Huevo me!"
Family Guy
"Mmm, perfect yolks this year."
Family Guy
"(mouth full): Four and a half minutes."
Family Guy
"Now, don't you worry, y'all will have a chance to line up"
Family Guy
"and meet Santy and let him know what dry goods you need."
Family Guy
"And right here in front of City Hall,"
Family Guy
"I'm placing this wooden nativity scene that I whittled myself"
Family Guy
"from a beech tree what was rat‐tailed"
Family Guy
"by lightning in the recent meteorological electricities."
Family Guy
"Oh, great, just what we need."
Family Guy
"A religious display on government property."
Family Guy
"Can't believe this is what my tax dollars are paying for."
Family Guy
"(scoffs) Last I heard, you never paid taxes in your life."
Family Guy
"Only 'cause I've never made enough money! Ha!"
Family Guy
"Brian, I can laugh at a lot of things,"
Family Guy
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