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Clips from The Big Bang Theory - The Matrimonial Momentum (S09E09)

"They're running a little behind."
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"- Should be pretty soon. - Okay."
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"Hey, if you're hungry, there's a breakfast buffet"
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"at the strip club next door."
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"Thanks, but I don't like glitter on my scrambled eggs."
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"I don't think the strippers prepare the meal, but okay."
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"Look, it-it's not how I pictured it either,"
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"but I'm still glad we're doing it."
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"Me, too."
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"- You sure? - Yes."
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"And you promise you're okay with everything from the car?"
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"Oh, my God, would you stop bringing it up?"
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"You're right. I'm sorry."
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"We have the rest of our lives"
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"to dredge stuff up from the past and fight about it."
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"So what do you think?"
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"Should we run next door and grab a bite?"
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"What if they call our names?"
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"Oh, don't worry. They gave me this vibrating coaster."
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"Oh, and the fairy tale continues."
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"Thank you for doing this."
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"Our pleasure."
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"You feeling okay?"
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"We were together for so long,"
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"I honestly don't know what I'm feeling."
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"Well, that's understandable."
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"You forgot. It's called "happy.""
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"Howard."
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"I'm not saying anything bad."
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"Just that she was in love with her captor"
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"and somehow managed to escape from his dark and crazy dungeon."
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"I know what you're going through."
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"My-my last breakup was pretty tough."
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"Oh. What was her name?"
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"Hey, it's a true story."
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"I don't need the third degree."
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"For God's sake, Sheldon, what are you doing?"
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"I didn't want to come in."
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"I was told it would make everyone feel uncomfortable."
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"So I'll just stay out here"
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"and pretend that I don't have to go to the bathroom."
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"Howard, do something."
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"I'm on it."
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"Sheldon, you being here might not be making things better."
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"I see."
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"And is that why everybody was invited but me?"
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"They didn't invite everybody but you."
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"Bernadette invited me,"
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"and Stuart lives here."
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"Who wants hot cinnamon rolls?"
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"So, when you hear the music, that's your cue."
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"Any questions?"
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"Oh, the package that we paid for"
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"said the aisle was supposed to be strewn with rose petals."
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"Where are the rose petals?!"
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"We're out!"
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"You know what? It's fine."
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"We can use the potpourri from the bathroom!"
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"Really, we're good."
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"Yup, just want to get married."
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"- Yeah. - Great."
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"I'll see you two up there."
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"- This is it. - I know."
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"I love you."
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"I love you, too."
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"Was that a yes or no on the potpourri?!"
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"- No, thank you! - We're good!"
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"Raj, you're probably wondering"
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"why Amy and I aren't showing any affection to one another."
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"Didn't even crack the top ten."
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"Well, you should know that she recently broke up with me."
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"I said I needed time to think."
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"I'm sure you guys will figure something out."
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"You hear that? Raj is devastated."
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"Sheldon, shh. The wedding's starting."
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"I see what's happening."
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"Sides are forming."
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"Well, if Bernadette's on Amy's team, I pick Howard."
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"I'm not taking sides."
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"Fine, I guess I'm stuck with Raj."
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"Really?"
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"At least you got picked."
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"Before I go any further,"
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"have either of you prepared your own vows?"
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"- Yes. - No."
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"You wrote vows?"
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"Yeah."
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"Well, I don't have any."
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"You're kind of making me look bad."
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"It's okay. I-I don't have to say them."
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"No, no, no, go ahead."
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"I'll come up with something mushy, you'll cry,"
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"we got this."
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""Penny, we are made of particles"
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"that have existed since the moment the universe began."
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"I like to think those atoms traveled"
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"14 billion years through time and space to create us,"
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"so that we could be together and make each other whole.""
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"Penny?"
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"Right. Um... okay."
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"Leonard, I mean, you're not only the love of my life."
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"I mean, you're my best friend, and..."
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"...you've got a friend in me."
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"You got troubles."
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"I got 'em, too."
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"There isn't anything I wouldn't do for you."
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"We stick together, and we can see it through,"
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"'cause... you've got a friend in me."
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"Is that the song from Toy Story?"
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"He loves that movie."
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"I do."
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"- Aw, that was beautiful. - Yeah."
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"I mean, not like our wedding beautiful."
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"No, we totally won."
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"Amy, I don't understand, are we broken up or not?"
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"It's like you can't make up your mind."
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"It's because you're not giving me any space to think."
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"Well, you should think fast,"
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"because men can sire offspring their entire lives,"
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"but those eggs you're toting around have a sell-by date."
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