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Clips from Scrubs - My Number One Doctor (S07E07)

"- You've got something on your face. - What?"
Scrubs
"Yeah, me."
Scrubs
"You know what? You hide it well, but you're a very strange person."
Scrubs
"Seventeen. That's impressive. But I'm going to kick your ass."
Scrubs
"in the microwave."
Scrubs
"That's how it goes when you fight me!"
Scrubs
"Make some room."
Scrubs
"On the clock."
Scrubs
"Because we're men, and that is what men do."
Scrubs
"by guessing how many coffee beans were in that there jar."
Scrubs
"What? Who came in first?"
Scrubs
"Back to Turk for confirmation."
Scrubs
"We threw our nerd farther than yours."
Scrubs
"Suck it, bitch!"
Scrubs
"Every doctor has their own way of dealing with patients."
Scrubs
"Turk was all about efficiency."
Scrubs
"Fine."
Scrubs
"Elliot preferred a more personal approach."
Scrubs
"Shannon, what's happening, girlfriend?"
Scrubs
"happy birthday to me."
Scrubs
"and occasionally drop the M.D. Bomb to pull hot tail in bars."
Scrubs
"Noted."
Scrubs
"He's out of his fricking mind."
Scrubs
"Since our wedding day, I am 136% less in love with her."
Scrubs
"So, you're experiencing vomiting and shortness of breath,"
Scrubs
"It's hard to be comfortable around terminal patients,"
Scrubs
"but Shannon made it easy."
Scrubs
"Her legs are fully paralysed and her arms are on their way."
Scrubs
"That does sound fun."
Scrubs
"Yeah, but you know what? I think I'm ready for all this."
Scrubs
"She looked so beautiful in her casket."
Scrubs
"Shannon, I hate to leave,"
Scrubs
"Okay."
Scrubs
"Have a good day, Mr Walmer."
Scrubs
"Diabetic Best Friends Forever."
Scrubs
"You don't usually bond with your patients."
Scrubs
"You're not changing who you are as a doctor to get good ratings, are you?"
Scrubs
"Please."
Scrubs
"- Please. - Sure."
Scrubs
"A private consultation with my surgeon would be very much appreciated,"
Scrubs
"There. I gave you five stars."
Scrubs
"also authored the Battlestar Galactica episode guide."
Scrubs
"- So, "Lady" is an unusual name. - Tell me about it."
Scrubs
"- That's so sweet. - Yeah."
Scrubs
"So, you'll never believe this."
Scrubs
"I didn't think so."
Scrubs
"Now let me read the final Harry Potter novel in peace."
Scrubs
"You wouldn't dare draw on me,"
Scrubs
"and I already know whether Harry lives or dies at the end."
Scrubs
"Hi, Elliot, what's up?"
Scrubs
"You look nice."
Scrubs
"I told you, those ratings are meaning..."
Scrubs
"Then that's definitely what I'll do next time."
Scrubs
"And soon, I won't be able to move my arms or even speak."
Scrubs
"a lifeless burden to Gayle."
Scrubs
"I know she's sweet, but she's a little silly for my taste."
Scrubs
"I get to go next."
Scrubs
"Why are you telling me all of this?"
Scrubs
"Shannon, I'm your doctor."
Scrubs
"One blueberry, please."
Scrubs
"Well, it's Friday, which is date night. So perhaps we should see a movie"
Scrubs
"and then get some ice cream while we walk and hold hands."
Scrubs
"- My uniform is khaki. - Your uniform is blue."
Scrubs
"- Leave me alone. - Yeah, right."
Scrubs
"Well, I might as well. Miriam here has already ruined the book for me."
Scrubs
""Signed, Michelle M.""
Scrubs
"Whoa!"
Scrubs
"Now to put the cursor back on Dr Turk,"
Scrubs
"who's lower down on the ranking list."
Scrubs
"How can I be last?"
Scrubs
"Someone named Coco Bosco wrote that she's sick of me saying,"
Scrubs
"Hell, Enid still thinks it's too snowy to go outside."
Scrubs
"to keep her out of the yard."
Scrubs
"I don't want it to end."
Scrubs
"Yeah, well, winning is way more important than friendship."
Scrubs
"After you're done rating me on Rate YourDoc. Org,"
Scrubs
"and be sure to check out the "Tranny Todd" feature."
Scrubs
"Sure as my name is Dr John Dorian."
Scrubs
"You know, as doctors,"
Scrubs
"sometimes we have to protect ourselves first."
Scrubs
"If you let this girl kill herself, it's gonna haunt you forever."
Scrubs
"I could handle it."
Scrubs
"You remember when you were treating that teenager and you broke his iPod?"
Scrubs
"You're right."
Scrubs
"I'll tell Gayle."
Scrubs
"Hi. Aren't we going out? What's with the jumpsuit?"
Scrubs
"Secondly, I think it's time that you knew the real me."
Scrubs
"It worked at home. I don't know. Maybe my table is slanted."
Scrubs
"I have broken the sound barrier, but you must never ask me how."
Scrubs
"I love a good train wreck."
Scrubs
"Furthermore, I think if you look closely at a monkey..."
Scrubs
"And so the lying begins."
Scrubs
"You big joker."
Scrubs
"Go change and I'll meet you outside."
Scrubs
"All right."
Scrubs
"Hey, what do you say, 23?"
Scrubs
"That's what they call me. Why do they call me that?"
Scrubs
"It's your new website ranking."
Scrubs
"and when I finally do, you have to go..."
Scrubs
"Him, I expected this from, but you?"
Scrubs
"Look, man, is there anything I can do to make it up to you?"
Scrubs
"Here you go, buddy. Your very own unicorn."
Scrubs
"Is there anything I can do to make it up to you?"
Scrubs
"- Stop it! - They're not real."
Scrubs
"Can we yell "White Lightning" every time I make a basket?"
Scrubs
"Don't. You know I hate the "G" word."
Scrubs
"Dude, enough practise lay-ups. I'm getting hoarse."
Scrubs
"Or you can come completely clean."
Scrubs
"Of course, if you're really the number one doctor,"
Scrubs
"Even if it will haunt you forever."
Scrubs
"makes me happier than a bullfrog in a beetle bin."
Scrubs
"Why are you talking like that?"
Scrubs
"'Cause I'm smitten with my girlfriend, Lady, and this is my smitten voice."
Scrubs
"My normal voice."
Scrubs
"How'd I do?"
Scrubs
"What's going on, C-Bizzle?"
Scrubs
"We're seeing who can last the longest in Mr Seller's room."
Scrubs
"It smells like the time I accidentally put lzzy's doo-doo diaper"
Scrubs
"- You guys are playing Smelly Belly? - Time."
Scrubs
"- Sixteen seconds. - Come on!"
Scrubs
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