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Clips from South Park - Jewbilee (S03E03)

"We'll be back to pick you up after the meteor shower party, boys."
South Park
"Goodbye, boys. Kyle and Ike, you be safe. And Kenny?"
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"Try and act Jewish."
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"Come on, Squirt. We're meeting over here."
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"- Who are you? - I'm the Squirt leader."
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"I don't want to be the Squirt leader, but I don't have a choice."
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"It's the only way I can earn my Chutzpah Badge,"
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"You have to go with him, Ike."
South Park
"Don't worry, Ike. Squirts is fun, and I'll be right over there in the next building."
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"Come on!"
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"- What? - Kenny McHeimenberg."
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"All right, get to Meshuggeneh Hall. The meeting is already starting."
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"Nobody is allowed to go in there when they're having a meeting."
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"Though we each come from a different sect of Judaism,"
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"on this night of Jewbilee, we all pray to Moses as one."
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"Now, let us introduce ourselves."
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"Elder Garth, from the synagogue of anti-Semites."
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"I don't believe I've heard of the anti-Semitic sect of Judaism before."
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"We're all going to make macaroni pictures, like this one,"
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"using dry macaroni, paper, and glue."
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"How come we have to make macaroni pictures?"
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"- What's your name? - No!"
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"How come your head is looking so funny-looking?"
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"And that's how we'll be making tonight's craft."
South Park
"And so you see, Scouts, all you need is a bar of soap and a dull knife,"
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"and you can make nifty soap sculptures like these."
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"Here's a giraffe and here's a cloud."
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"You can all pick up your bars of soap later on,"
South Park
"as we will all be making soap sculptures tonight."
South Park
"Now, this year, we are pleased to announce that Jewbilee"
South Park
"has grown to over 100 Jew Scouts from all around the country."
South Park
"All new inductees raise your hands."
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"That's you, Kenny. Raise your hand."
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"Yes, and what is your name, young man?"
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"- Junichi. - Wonderful."
South Park
"Could you run out and grab some of those candles for us?"
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"Now I would like all the new inductees to step forward please."
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"This part kind of sucks, Kenny. But don't screw it up."
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"Raise your left hand and repeat after me."
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"- I pledge to be a Jew Scout. - I pledge to be a Jew Scout."
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"- My honour wide and true. - My honour wide and true."
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"- I am proud to be a Jew Scout. - I am proud to be a Jew Scout."
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"- Otherwise, I'd just be a Jew. - Otherwise, I'd just be a Jew."
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"Okay, Squirts, let's see what you made macaroni pictures of."
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"- Matthew? - Cat."
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"- Joseph? - Triangle!"
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"Okay. Ike?"
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"What the cheese?"
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"We're gonna go hunt us a bear! Then I'll get my Chutzpah Badge for sure!"
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"Enough already! What has Moses ever done for us?"
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"Not mine. Tonight's meteor shower is a sign of the new time."
South Park
"We should use it to pray to Haman and enter into a new millennium of faith."
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"Enough, Elder! You will not speak the name of Haman here!"
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"If you guys love Moses so much, why don't you marry him?"
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"We accept all denominations of Judaism here at Scouts, Elder,"
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"Get out and do not return. You are no longer welcome here."
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"Jewbilee is the time of Haman! You will all see how wrong you are very soon,"
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"when Haman returns from the ninth tower of Disillusionment"
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"and smotes Moses and all his followers into pillars of dust"
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"that would cry for their petty lives, but can't,"
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"having recently been turned into dust and all."
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"You will see! You will see this very night!"
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"Hello."
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"Come on, Kenny. You have to get in the circle."
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"This is where we all stand in a circle"
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"Let's pray to Moses for guidance."
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"Stupid assholes! Moses isn't going to teach them anything."
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"Okay, Squirts, remember the plan, immobilize and attack."
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"Matthew, you immobilize the bear with a net,"
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"then Echo team run up and attack it with your Squirt knives."
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"Now!"
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"Oh, Frank!"
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"No!"
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"Oh, no! Oh, God!"
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"The bear took a Squirt. I'm gonna get it now!"
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"The hour of Jewbilee is near. Let all debts be forgiven and all slaves freed."
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"so that he may rejoice and be pleased."
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"It's a duck."
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""And it was foretold that the spirit of Moses would finally rest,"
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""when his spirit was imprisoned by Haman in a conch shell of blind faith.""
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"Moses, the Squirts have made you tidings of macaroni pictures."
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"They should be here any second. Where the hell are the Squirts?"
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"Now, we'll just see how Mr. Bear likes rat poison."
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"Okay, raise the tray!"
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"Chutzpah Badge, here I come."
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"Yikes!"
South Park
"That's it. That's it, you goddamn stupid bear-face."
South Park
"Kumbaya, my Lord, kumbaya O Lord, kumbaya"
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"I desire macaroni pictures."
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"Yes, yes. The macaroni pictures are coming right away."
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"I desire popcorn necklaces."
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"You heard him, get to making popcorn necklaces right away!"
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"Hold!"
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"Oh, no. He's on to me, Haman."
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"- An impurity, Moses? - This child here is not kosher."
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"Elder, it's not my fault. He told me he was Jewish."
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"A non-Jew has infiltrated Jew Scouts and looked upon the face of Moses."
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"You are banished from here."
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"You must leave before the great eating of carrot cake."
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"- He doesn't get cake? - No cake for the impurity."
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"Go now. You do not belong here."
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"Elder! What are you doing?"
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"He is reading from the book of Haman!"
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"- Into the conch shell, Moses! - Help!"
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"And there you shall stay, trapped for all eternity!"
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"Elder, what have you done?"
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"- Release Moses now! - I don't think so."
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"When do we get to eat carrot cake?"
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"Now, all of you into that building, or I'll shoot you where you stand!"
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"- Elder, you can not mean... - Move!"
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"Now! Now, Haman! Your time has come."
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"If he summons Haman, we will all be destroyed."
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"We are Jew Squirts We know Jew words"
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"Alpha 5 and Gamma 7 will be on recon team."
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"Once we're in position, I want constant contact between all squad leaders."
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"We'll flush him out and then we'll attack him."
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"and we can spend the rest of the night making bear sandwiches."
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"- Where is Ishmael? - No."
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"God damn it!"
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"You stupid goddamn son of a bear! You've taken your last Squirt!"
South Park
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