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Clips from The Simpsons - Papa Don't Leech (S19E19)

"he would use, and could anyone do it?"
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"Where you going?"
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"Lurleen Lumpkin has a hole in her heart,"
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"and I'm gonna fill it."
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"Everyone at Lumpkin, Lumpkin and Rosenthal Associates,"
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"an Asian or Pacific Islander named Cho Lum Kin..."
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"Good luck in searchings!"
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"... but still no sign of Lurleen's dad!"
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"Hello."
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"Lurleen?"
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"I ain't seen my little girl in 30 years."
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"She must be what, uh, 12, 13 by now?"
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"She's 34, and she's having a rough time!"
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"Oh, man."
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"Oh, man."
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"I better heroin up this orange juice."
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"There's only one man who can hambone like that."
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"Daddy!"
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"Lurleen?! My goodness."
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"Why, you're the spittin' image of your mother's hotter sister!"
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"I've been a dang fool. That's where."
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"Can you forgive me, Lurleen?"
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"I can, Daddy!"
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"Wait a minute. He's a deadbeat dad,"
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"a dad too lazy to run away!"
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"And he has hair! Oh!"
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"Bart, get me my suicide axe."
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"No suicide axe!"
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"You know what I like best about this T-shirt?"
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"I'll always be able to see your face."
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"Oh, well, you don't"
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"need a T-shirt for that, Tootsie Pop,"
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"'cause I ain't ever gonna leave you again."
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"- Just sit still in my lap! - What lap?"
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"Why you little..."
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"What?"
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"and he's father of the year. Why can't I leave for 30 years?"
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"Fine with me. Look, I packed you a bag."
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"- it might be cold outside. - No problem. I bought you a hat."
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"Oh, I see. It's reverse psychology."
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"Well, in that case, I'm not going, and I'm not staying."
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"then take a walk on the ceiling."
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"Oh, Daddy, you made me the happiest girl"
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"on whichever side of the Mississippi this is."
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"o/~ I haven't felt this good since the Lord knows when o/~"
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"o/~ And I'm sure you got a million reasons o/~"
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"o/~ Yeah, Daddy's back o/~ o/~ And I'm feelin' like a daughter o/~"
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"o/~ My body wash is Este Lauder o/~"
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"o/~ And here comes Grampa with an otter! o/~"
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"Song's over, Dad."
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"Oh! I took three buses to get here."
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"o/~ Daddy's a deadbeat o/~"
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"o/~ He's leaving his daughter again. o/~"
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"I'm really worried about Lurleen."
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"Yeah, me, too."
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"Since her father re-abandoned her,"
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"she's cut the word "pop" out of all of our foods."
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"It's actually really depressing."
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"Aw, cheer up. You still got your talent,"
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"and that new song you wrote is gonna be a really big hit."
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"Here's a new song that's rising faster"
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"than a rocket with a rocket up its butt."
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"It's from the Dixie Chicks!"
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"o/~ We said some things that came out wrong o/~"
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"o/~ But now we've got a brand-new song o/~"
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"o/~ 'Cause free speech needs curtailin' now and then o/~"
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"o/~ Please take away our right to choose... o/~"
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"Ooh, that sounds"
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"just like my song, but how could they have heard...?"
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"o/~ Liberty has o/~ o/~ Never looked hotter o/~"
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"If you need me, I'll be..."
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"No one needs me."
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"And Major Marge!"
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"- Well, I don't... - Lurleen, you're giving"
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"your dad too much power over the way"
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"Stop getting your self-esteem from the men in your life."
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"You're married to a kind, thoughtful genius."
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"Uh, yeah..."
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"Marge, my fringes are knotted again."
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"There's only one person in the world"
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"who can tell you what to do."
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"And that person is right here!"
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"Santa Claus?!"
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"No, no, that's just our old Christmas decorations."
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"- Me?! - Yes!"
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"And remember, you can do anything you want in the world of country music,"
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"Regular movies... don't hold your breath."
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"But TV movies... the sky's the limit."
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"Congratulations! That song I wrote you"
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"was so patriotic, they decided to make it"
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"into a Chevy commercial, so I, uh, changed a few lines."
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"I don't know."
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"You're asking us to sell out our song. And for what?"
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"Cash money."
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"- Money? Ooh, we love money! - Really? That's great!"
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"A dirty, rotten, lowdown..."
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"I think I can say it better with this."
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"He needs that to think up our songs."
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"Okay, maybe I abandoned my daughter"
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"and stole her song, but I'm still the most"
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"Well, he's got us there."
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"Still, in human terms, he's deplorable."
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"No!"
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"I'm droppin' y'all as clients!"
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"Oh, I can't thank you guys enough."
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"Now I'm opening for the Dixie Chicks,"
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"and I may have just met husband #4."
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"Ooh, I think he's a keeper."
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"Well, you're very welcome, Lurleen. Of all the women who've hit on Homer"
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"If you ever come near Homer again,"
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"I'll strangle you with your own hair extensions."
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"That's right. I know."
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"Too fast!"
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"My back hurts! All my friends are dead!"
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"Oh, no..."
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"And I used rhetoric in my answer?"
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"Um, what say you leave the cookies,"
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"And that's how a fake FEMA official scammed us"
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"Dad was Colonel Homer and he wore that awesome suit"
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"Gee, after all that's passed between us, I mean..."
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