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Clips from 30 Rock - Flu Shot (S03E03)

"Both ends! Both ends!"
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"# Let's go have some thrills... Pack his pills and his glasses...?"
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"# We'll be out till dawn...?"
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"# Strap your helmet on...?"
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"Four days until vacation week. Where are we all going?"
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"Then at night, I've got to drive around Newark looking for my runaway daughter."
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"Oh."
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"Oh. What happened to your hand?"
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"What is that?"
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"...'s mother."
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"Kenneth?"
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"Don't worry, Miss Lemon. I never get sick."
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"I have the constitution of an ox."
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"When did I walk barefoot near an ox?"
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"Go home. You are not ruining my vacation!"
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"Liz, wait. Did you get that swim thing for your vacation?"
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"No. What? Wait. What are you talking about?"
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"The hotel was overbooked. I texted you."
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"No. No, you didn't!"
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"Oh, I forgot to hit send."
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"I got a great reservation to celebrate our first real date."
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"I guess that counts."
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"I thought today was your day off."
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"He's a sweet, old man with advanced dementia."
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"Totally disconnected from reality."
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"Elisa, are you telling me that you work seven days a week?"
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"Yes. I have two jobs."
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"That's what regular people do, you know?"
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"Especially those whose grandmothers are addicted to online poker."
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"It's not because you're a..."
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"...I'm sorry. What do you call yourself?"
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"No, I know you can say that. But what do I call you?"
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"A Puerto Rican."
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"Wow. That does not sound right."
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"Kenneth, why are you still here?"
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"Oh, don't worry about me. I'm "A-oh-boy.""
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"Sully! Brett Favre, right?"
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"Jack, I need to ask you to drop your pants."
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"That's it."
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"Have a sucker."
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"Lemon, there you are."
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"Not my favorite part of the medical profession."
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"Can I ask you a question as a woman?"
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"Uh... Liz."
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"Oh. Sorry."
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"She works all the time."
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"You know she's a second-generation Puerto Rican."
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"That's what I thought."
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"With work and everything, it's turning out to be complicated."
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"Lemon, I need you to tell me who on your staff"
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"is important enough to get one."
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"That's not okay."
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"Yes, Lemon. Important people get better health care."
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"They also get better restaurant reservations,"
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"bigger seats in planes --"
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"A more refined class of prostitute..."
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"For me, it's really about the companionship."
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"Like it or not, you're one of us now."
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"My grandfather dug out the White Haven quarry,"
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"and my other grandfather filled it back in with the sludge from the eraser factory."
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"It's not about that. It's about fairness. I don't want the shot."
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"Jack. What are you doing here?"
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"Making this work. I brought some dinner and Monopoly."
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"We can have a fun, low-key night. Unless I lose."
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"But very inappropriate."
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"Who's going to tell them? Him?"
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"You work so hard."
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"Don't you think you deserve some time for yourself?"
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"and I've never seen a Broadway play, or been in a restaurant without a TV in it."
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"Okay, you can stay."
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"What is wrong with it?"
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"Is that a beak?"
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"- Yes! - No."
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"Yes!"
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"Maui is the wind surfing capital of the world!"
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"Guys, come on. We have to shoot these promos."
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"It's not a truth serum."
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"Then why am I telling you you look like Tootsie today?"
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"The crew is on death's door, and you're arguing about Hawaii?"
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"No need, sir. It would be an honor to die at my post"
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"Wrapped in a Confederate Flag, fried and fed to dogs."
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"Two-tiered health care is a crime."
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"What a surprise. You've seen the Michael Moore movie."
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"Think again, Jack. I saw the trailer when I went to see Alvin and the Chipmunks."
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"But this flu shot rationing is baloney."
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"If my crew can't get a shot, I'm not getting a shot."
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"God bless you, crewman!"
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"We've got to fight the power!"
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"Oh, boy."
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"Fight the powers that be!"
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"This makes me want to "shoop"!"
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"Mr. Jordan. Miss Maroney. You wanted to see me?"
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"Kenneth, Tracy and I want to do something for the crew."
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"So, go do that."
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"All the other pages have gone home sick."
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"I can't make any runs right now."
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"Well, I'm saying you could get your wallet --"
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"My what?"
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"No."
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"Without the crew, we'd just be two amazing people succeeding in a vacuum."
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"Come on. Do it for them."
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"Yeah. For the crew."
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"Yeah, I did, too."
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"Are you with Mr. Templeton now?"
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"How I envy him."
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"I wish you would exercise my muscles..."
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"...so they don't atrophy."
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"Well, are you coming over tonight?"
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"We can finish our game of Monopoly."
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"Of course I am."
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"I'm just going to be a little late."
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"You know I can't, Jack."
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"Are you kidding me?"
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"I'd love to go out..."
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"...get all dressed up, tip maitre d's, and be all like..."
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""Thank you, Roger. This table was super-duper.""
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"But I spend all my time with the BigVegetable."
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"Why can't I have fun like an upper-middle-class person?"
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"You sound just like Lemon. Come with me tonight."
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"# Go with us... See a show with us...?"
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