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Clips from King of the Hill - Torch Song Hillogy (S06E06)

"And I graciously accepted."
King of the Hill
"It's a football trophy. That's a running back fending off a tackler."
King of the Hill
"I thought you said it was me putting my nerf ball away in the toy hamper."
King of the Hill
"Well, it was just sitting in a box gathering dust and dust-mite feces."
King of the Hill
"Oh, for crying out loud. How many trophies do you have?"
King of the Hill
"Look, Bobby, I want to see you get a trophy, too."
King of the Hill
"No, thanks."
King of the Hill
"You have a shelf full of awards and a beautiful wife on your arm."
King of the Hill
"Why can't Bobby have a trophy, too?"
King of the Hill
"Why not make every Super Bowl a tie so everyone gets a ring..."
King of the Hill
"Hank, I am having a brainstorm. Bobby!"
King of the Hill
"-You mean it? -Don't make fun of the boy."
King of the Hill
"and I will close with a quotation from the Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr."
King of the Hill
"I'll go turn on your computer and warm up the seat."
King of the Hill
"Good boy."
King of the Hill
"[Sighing]"
King of the Hill
"But now she's dragging the Olympics into it?"
King of the Hill
"Just because Bobby wears a cape doesn't make him a hero."
King of the Hill
"I make a good point."
King of the Hill
"There are so many more deserving people in this town."
King of the Hill
"She's just setting him up for a big fall..."
King of the Hill
"Today is the day. They're gonna announce that I get to carry the torch."
King of the Hill
"Although, to be true to the ancient Olympians before me..."
King of the Hill
"That's about 500 trips to the refrigerator, just so you know."
King of the Hill
"I know. That's why I've been training."
King of the Hill
"Bobby, you seem to have a hitch in your get-along."
King of the Hill
"No, Dad. I'm speed walking."
King of the Hill
"endorsed by the American Association of Retired Persons."
King of the Hill
"-Easier on the knees. -Beautiful, Bobby."
King of the Hill
"Congratulations, sug'!"
King of the Hill
"Bobby, you won."
King of the Hill
"To be fair, Hank, I wrote the essay."
King of the Hill
"Okay, who's ready for the big news?"
King of the Hill
"Mr. Hill, you will be running the Arlen leg of the Olympic-torch relay."
King of the Hill
"But, Mom, you said I was gonna get a trophy."
King of the Hill
"Isn't that precious? Now, give the torch to your daddy."
King of the Hill
"Hold on. I've got some mail for him, too."
King of the Hill
"It's you, sug'. Congratulations."
King of the Hill
"I'm not trying to tell you how to do your business..."
King of the Hill
"So, how does it feel to be the official torchbearer?"
King of the Hill
"Are you filled with pride? Humility?"
King of the Hill
"What are you filled with, sug'? Arlen wants to know."
King of the Hill
"Mostly confusion. See, I didn't--"
King of the Hill
"I will tell you what he is not filled with. Shame."
King of the Hill
"For nominating himself behind my back."
King of the Hill
"I wonder what else you do back there without me knowing."
King of the Hill
"Let's get some B-roll of me smiling."
King of the Hill
"I didn't nominate myself. I haven't written an essay since high school."
King of the Hill
"It's okay. You deserve it more than I do."
King of the Hill
"Thanks. Maybe someday I'll get a trophy for that."
King of the Hill
"So, Hank, if you did not write that essay, who did?"
King of the Hill
"But you were right, Hank."
King of the Hill
"The torch should go to someone really deserving."
King of the Hill
"And that's you. Even if we didn't win State."
King of the Hill
"After all, Hank, America is not just a land of opportunity..."
King of the Hill
"[Sniffing]"
King of the Hill
"[All cheering]"
King of the Hill
"This salsa's stinging my cuts."
King of the Hill
"I'm fixing to bring out the tortilla chips. I'm not gonna tell you again."
King of the Hill
"And I wouldn't be if Dale hadn't baked all day."
King of the Hill
"Well, then, you shouldn't have had your henchmen write that essay."
King of the Hill
"[All protesting]"
King of the Hill
"No, no, not that. I made him donate that to the teaching hospital."
King of the Hill
"Ted Koppel arranges to have 44 Americans held hostage on a soundstage..."
King of the Hill
"The hopes and dreams of a small Texas town in the state of Texas..."
King of the Hill
"Look at Hank go!"
King of the Hill
"Nothing's changed."
King of the Hill
"Okay, stop it. No one wants to watch this."
King of the Hill
"Hey, who wants to dance? Dale, help me move that couch."
King of the Hill
"-Dang it. -What's the matter, Hank?"
King of the Hill
"You don't want to see the part where you broke your ankle?"
King of the Hill
"Yeah, man. It's like he's going back there in the pocket..."
King of the Hill
"-Anyone want to see Nancy in an art film? -Sug'!"
King of the Hill
"someday someone's gonna make the world's largest fruit pie."
King of the Hill
"And the next day..."
King of the Hill
"I'm gonna get in the Guinness Book of World Records for eating it."
King of the Hill
"Bobby, I'm not in the mood for riddles right now."
King of the Hill
"I'll have my moment in the sun someday. But this one's yours."
King of the Hill
"BOBBY: Okay, your trousers are filthy."
King of the Hill
"But so were everybody else's. Forget about it."
King of the Hill
"Keep watching."
King of the Hill
"There's more."
King of the Hill
"I didn't realize people walked like Egyptians back then."
King of the Hill
"It's shameful, the worst kind of useless showboating."
King of the Hill
"The only thing missing was an earring."
King of the Hill
"And on the very next play, going for the two-point conversion..."
King of the Hill
"that would have won us the championship..."
King of the Hill
"He didn't give me a fatal heart attack..."
King of the Hill
"because he still wanted me to sell propane."
King of the Hill
"God wasn't punishing you, it was just a coincidence."
King of the Hill
"Is this why you're so uptight all the time..."
King of the Hill
"because you think something bad is gonna happen if you act happy?"
King of the Hill
"Remember when you saw that bumper sticker, ""Honk if You Love America""?"
King of the Hill
"You smiled, pumped your arm, and honked twice."
King of the Hill
"And your car didn't go off the road."
King of the Hill
"Well, if Bobby says it's all right for you to run with the torch..."
King of the Hill
"I will not oppose him. And I will not oppose you."
King of the Hill
"Give me another 0.5 miles."
King of the Hill
"[Hank chuckling]"
King of the Hill
"Hot or cold towel, Hank?"
King of the Hill
"You secreting, me absorbing."
King of the Hill
"Come on. Give them a little taste, Dad."
King of the Hill
"Okay. Remember, honey, you're going to be on TV..."
King of the Hill
"What thing?"
King of the Hill
"Which hand do you think you will carry the torch in?"
King of the Hill
"Did you give any thought to any other hand?"
King of the Hill
"No, I did not."
King of the Hill
"Sounds like the Durndle Torchbearer approacheth."
King of the Hill
"Finally. It took him forever."
King of the Hill
"Oh, he is so brave."
King of the Hill
"[Crowd cheering]"
King of the Hill
"Dang it, Dale."
King of the Hill
"This flame traveled 3,000 miles, plus the distance from the sun to Greece."
King of the Hill
"Au coitraire, I am inhaling it."
King of the Hill
"Oh, my God. Stop him. He's running in the wrong direction!"
King of the Hill
"Oh, no, he's not. He's not, people! Everything's fine!"
King of the Hill
"I'm so darn happy I'd skip the rest of the way."
King of the Hill
"[Exclaiming]"
King of the Hill
"Oh, no."
King of the Hill
"Hank. Have you been shot?"
King of the Hill
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