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Clips from Chappelle's Show - Episode #1.10 (S01E01)

"He put it down."
Chappelle's Show
"wouldn't let that scandal stop him"
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"Man, I'm paid. I got it made."
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"I'll piss on you. I'll pee on you."
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"Pour on you."
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"I want to pee in your food."
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"Only thing to make my life complete"
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"I want to pee on you."
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"I don't even want none of the above."
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"Won't you braid my hair,"
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"say, won't you braid my hair?"
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"How else?"
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"Are all their dicks really big?"
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"Or are some small, some big?"
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"Brothers are packing, they seem to be packing."
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"I guess that's the way of the world."
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"You go white, you go running back to black."
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"It happens that way."
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"Wasn't Mariah Carey married to a white man?"
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"And then they divorced..."
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"she was humping on black chairs,"
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"she went crazy when she got away from him."
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"Okay, I've always wondered why black guys shave their heads."
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"I mean, it just seems that they have great hair,"
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"and I could never figure out"
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"It's just a fad."
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"You know they ain't gonna let a nigga have nothing."
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"they took that, they take everything."
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"They took Tina Turner."
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"They took James Brown... they gave him back."
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"Who else they take?"
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"Oh, they'll take stuff from you."
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"They will take, they won't let us have too much fun."
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"the other night at my show."
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"I said, "don't get too fond of me"
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"'cause white folks'll come in and take me.""
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"I get to talking some mess on your show,"
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"they'll take your show, they'll fix you, too."
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"That Paul Mooney is something!"
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"(man) What?!"
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"I pick you up from the club."
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"Got a surprise, close your eyes."
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"I'm gonna give you some pee-pee."
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"This is the remix edition of the song about pissin'."
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"I got that peein' leakin', reekin'"
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"and there's juice in the kitchen."
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""I Wanna Piss On You" remix."
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"Chappelle's Show. Ow."
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"Hey, gang."
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"They really enlightened me."
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"But now, we turn your attention to a classic war"
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"that took place right here on American soil."
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"a violent war has been waged between two bitter enemies,"
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"But not just any basketball shoes."
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""Ay, dog, ay,""
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"Earl "The Snake" White called out"
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"after a rival member of the 19th Street Gangsters,"
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"General Cornrow Wallace,"
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"made minor contact with his shoes."
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"Ay, dog, ay."
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"The Snake knew then that he would have to fight him."
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"Get that shit off my sneakers!"
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"and rallied the troops with a most impassioned speech."
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"Some mark-ass trick just stepped on my sneakers"
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"Robble, robble."
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"(all) Robble, robble!"
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"Let's ride on these fools at their own barbecue."
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"stomping on people's sneakers"
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"to let them know who ran the projects."
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"General Cornrow Wallace pulled out a gun..."
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"unheard of, at that point, in street fighting."
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"A resident called 9-1-1 immediately."
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"Police showed up promptly four hours later."
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"who regaled Cornrow with stories"
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"It's called crack!"
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"It's great!"
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"And it's so simple to make!"
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"All you need is some cocaine"
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"and some baking soda..."
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"and I think I tasted egg and cinnamon."
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"Whoever sells it is gonna be rich!"
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"Cornrow immediately alerted his friends on the outside"
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"via a letter."
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""All the best, Cornrollup."
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"P.S. (coos)""
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"They immediately started cooking the stuff up"
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"and selling it on what little space they still controlled."
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"In no time, Snake and his crew followed suit."
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"The money made fueled what became a heated arms race"
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"between the two groups."
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"The violence escalated every year,"
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"finally peaking in 1989"
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"at the battle of the Kool Moe Dee concert,"
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"Newly released from prison,"
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"and filled with Cornrow's signature bird call."
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"but what the crew did next"
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"The crew went to the graveyard"
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"and dug up General Cornrow Wallace's body,"
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"The incident was videotaped"
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"Look at us."
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"High five! High five!"
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"where the Cardinal Projects once stood."
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"All right!"
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"Snake, knowing what you do now, was it all worth it?"
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"Yeah, it was a tragedy!"
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"Can you repeat the question?"
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"For the History Channel, I'm Jeff Frankel."
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"(applause)"
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"Hello, America."
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"address the allegations that this is somehow"
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"that these allegations are absolutely and 100% false."
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"Secondly, and most importantly,"
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"I'd like to say that you motherfuckers disgust me!"
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"If you knew just one of the things"
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"I was sworn to secrecy to,"
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"Mr. President! Mr. President!"
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"I have here in my hand the cure for AIDS."
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"We've had this for 25 years."
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"Have a great weekend."
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"Well, I have somebody I'd like you to meet."
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