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Clips from Archer (2009) - Animation (S02E02)

"- It's fine, please excuse me. - My Mother's..."
Archer (2009)
"Check the break room."
Archer (2009)
"And you. Go see Krieger this instant."
Archer (2009)
"CHERYL: With our earballs."
Archer (2009)
"She killed, like, 10 Russians to save my life."
Archer (2009)
"[GASPS, THEN SPEAKS IN RUSSIAN]"
Archer (2009)
"Right? Almost as cool as my van."
Archer (2009)
"Wait, please tell me you're into Rush."
Archer (2009)
"Oh, the only rush I know is my love for your comrade, Sterling Archer."
Archer (2009)
"Here, drink this. You're talking crazy."
Archer (2009)
"So, what do you think?"
Archer (2009)
"But I'll just bet Nikolai Jakov is so jealous of my, ahem, friendship with Len Trexler..."
Archer (2009)
"- No, you have actual egg on your face. - What? Unh!"
Archer (2009)
"[KNOCKS ON DOOR]"
Archer (2009)
"...and I was trying to beat my record for cramming pool balls in my mouth..."
Archer (2009)
"- No. You swallowed a pool ball? - I wish just one."
Archer (2009)
"A green card?"
Archer (2009)
"First of all..."
Archer (2009)
"- What? KATYA: What?"
Archer (2009)
"Oh, you are just your mother all over."
Archer (2009)
"Does one ring rule them all?"
Archer (2009)
"PAM: Oh, shit."
Archer (2009)
"Wait till everybody sees this."
Archer (2009)
"And then we beginning Phase Three."
Archer (2009)
"Darling, I swear, it's a fake."
Archer (2009)
"Although, that is what you'd say if you were a double agent."
Archer (2009)
"- Wait, no, no, no. - Ow, ow."
Archer (2009)
"- Damn it. ARCHER: Ha-ha-ha."
Archer (2009)
"I bet Mother was hitting star again."
Archer (2009)
"Anywhere but there."
Archer (2009)
"- Lf I wanted to hit her, I could have. - Well, yeah, she is huge."
Archer (2009)
"And what about helping me escape?"
Archer (2009)
"- But he is not a double agent. - Are you retarded?"
Archer (2009)
"[CHUCKLES]"
Archer (2009)
"Zip it, you two."
Archer (2009)
"- Yes. - Even her?"
Archer (2009)
"For God's sake, are you hearing yourself?"
Archer (2009)
"Woodhouse? Listen very carefully."
Archer (2009)
"And, uh, calfskin, you said? Aah..."
Archer (2009)
"...isn't my idea of a good time."
Archer (2009)
"So nyet promotion..."
Archer (2009)
"I can't hold it, she's breaking up."
Archer (2009)
"We have the technology."
Archer (2009)
"Barry Dillon will be that man."
Archer (2009)
"Better than he was before."
Archer (2009)
"MAN: And what brings you to New York, Mr. Berg?"
Archer (2009)
"So, um, comrade Bionic Barry, can you solve my Kasanova problem?"
Archer (2009)
"But since I don't and/or do not..."
Archer (2009)
"- Hail, Mary, mother of... BARRY: Unh!"
Archer (2009)
"Let's, uh, put a pin in that promotion."
Archer (2009)
"This van's, like, rolling probable cause."
Archer (2009)
"- So all ashore from the S.S. Date Rape. - Toot, toot."
Archer (2009)
"...so we can draw where the zippers are gonna go on your body."
Archer (2009)
"At one time, yes, but I needed a place to sew your suits, you see, so..."
Archer (2009)
"- Eh. - Uh..."
Archer (2009)
"But, sir, you can't leave. Your mother..."
Archer (2009)
"You're serious, aren't you?"
Archer (2009)
"Woodhouse, I quit drinking for her."
Archer (2009)
"- No, I guess it wouldn't be Mother's. - No, sir, it was her mother's."
Archer (2009)
"Ugh. Please don't make him into a suitcase."
Archer (2009)
"Who do you think's been paying my salary all these years?"
Archer (2009)
"I just thought you were... Well, slave's not the right word, but, really?"
Archer (2009)
"MALORY: Sterling, dear."
Archer (2009)
"Katya, I swear, I've never been more sure about anything."
Archer (2009)
"But no shots center-mass. Just try to wing them."
Archer (2009)
"Mother, no."
Archer (2009)
"I know you're having a disturbingly hard time with this..."
Archer (2009)
"I knew I forgot to mention something, and it was this."
Archer (2009)
"We will talk about it in the van."
Archer (2009)
"Well, since it sounds like I don't have to help with the wedding plans..."
Archer (2009)
"I thought I'd be dead long before this day ever came."
Archer (2009)
"Oh, shut up, you old sourpuss."
Archer (2009)
"- Thank you, thank you. - Uh-huh."
Archer (2009)
"- And, plus, we still need a priest, so... - How about a disgraced former minister?"
Archer (2009)
"ARCHER: What? PAM: What the shit?"
Archer (2009)
"Long story, kind of boring..."
Archer (2009)
"...but I am still licensed by the state to perform marriages..."
Archer (2009)
"ALL: Barry? - Yes, Barry, hi."
Archer (2009)
"And what's ironic is Archer, besides sodomizing my fiancée..."
Archer (2009)
"- The unholy abomination of metal fused with flesh which now stands before you."
Archer (2009)
"Yeah, so back to the irony, now I'm gonna throw you off the roof."
Archer (2009)
"Wow, Barry, you're, like, super strong."
Archer (2009)
"- Archer, we're out of ammo. - Well, I'm not."
Archer (2009)
"And if anyone's going to ruin my son's wedding..."
Archer (2009)
"BARRY: Archer! KATYA: I love you!"
Archer (2009)
"[SOBBING] Oh, Katya, no!"
Archer (2009)
"[GASPING AND MOANING]"
Archer (2009)
"Mm, Sterling Archer. The world's most dangerous spy."
Archer (2009)
"ARCHER: Oh, I don't know about all that."
Archer (2009)
"No? Well, do you know that I fell in love the moment I saw you?"
Archer (2009)
"ARCHER: Really? With who?"
Archer (2009)
"KATYA: Oh, you silly man, who do you think?"
Archer (2009)
"Well, I don't know. There were a lot of guys there."
Archer (2009)
"[GUNS COCK]"
Archer (2009)
"KATYA: Not when I was finished."
Archer (2009)
"ARCHER: Oh."
Archer (2009)
"Oh, I like the way that sounds."
Archer (2009)
"Me too. Me, and you, and..."
Archer (2009)
"[SCREAMS AND GASPS]"
Archer (2009)
"Hello."
Archer (2009)
"...do you think you're doing?"
Archer (2009)
"ARCHER: I, um... - Darling, I know she is old..."
Archer (2009)
"...but you allow such talk from your secretary?"
Archer (2009)
"Katya, this is actually my mother."
Archer (2009)
"[SPEAKS IN RUSSIAN]"
Archer (2009)
"And, Mother, this is Katya Kasanova."
Archer (2009)
"She saved my life in Moscow, she's former KGB..."
Archer (2009)
"...she wants to defect and become an ISIS agent and she's..."
Archer (2009)
"Mortified. I beg your forgiveness."
Archer (2009)
"And don't you want to freshen up after your long ride?"
Archer (2009)
"Phrasing, Mother. Sorry, Katya."
Archer (2009)
"Maybe you'll get lucky and find some Wetnaps."
Archer (2009)
"What...? I don't need a doctor, Mother. Katya doesn't have VD."
Archer (2009)
"Ha, ha. For your... That was pretty good."
Archer (2009)
"I want Krieger to x-ray that tiny brain of yours..."
Archer (2009)
"What? No, they didn't."
Archer (2009)
"Then you're as dumb as you are stupid, because best-case scenario..."
Archer (2009)
"...that Russian tramp wants to con you into marriage for a green card, and..."
Archer (2009)
"LANA: Hah! - Why doesn't everybody come in here?"
Archer (2009)
"PAM: It's okay. We can hear from out here."
Archer (2009)
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