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Clips from 30 Rock - Leap Day (S06E06)

"♪ Leap Day William"
30 Rock
"♪ Leap Day William"
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"♪ bursting from the sea"
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"♪ will he bring his bucket of sweets for mom and pop and me ♪"
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"What the crap is going on in here?"
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"Miss Lemon, did you not grow up"
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"with Leap Day William?"
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"He lives in the Mariana trench."
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"He emerges every four years"
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"to trade children's tears for candy?"
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"What? No."
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"But white haven was founded by the amish,"
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"and we really only celebrated their holidays."
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"It was crazy."
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"But where were you when we did this four years ago?"
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"Certainly not at a Michael's crafts crafting cruise."
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"Oh, miss Lemon, you are missing out."
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"Every four years, you get a magical extra day."
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"For instance, I am wearing"
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"a braided necklace with a shark's tooth on it."
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"I listened to rap music for the first time."
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"Not a fan."
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"And you and I are going to a party"
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"thrown by a billionaire."
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"Come on, take a leap, Liz."
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"Okay, fine, I'll go, but if he has a giant chandelier"
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"Happy Leap Day, Lemon."
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"- Help yourself to some rhubarb. - Rhubarb?"
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"Is white haven the only city in America"
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"that doesn't celebrate Leap Day?"
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"Just a Leap Day William parade, citywide ice maze"
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"if you're not wearing yellow and blue."
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"- We just, uh, stomp on your foot. - Ow!"
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"Kick you in the knee, Yankees suck, go pats."
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"I can't believe the woman who watches"
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"has never seen the movie, Leap Dave Williams."
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"I'm sorry, is Leap Dave Williams"
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"It's a classic. Uptight lawyer Dave Williams"
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"turns into the real Leap Day William"
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"Dave, is everything all right?"
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"I mean, yes."
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"Oh, my God, that's what Chris kept quoting this morning"
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"during our love... making."
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"New assistant reporting for duty."
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"Gabe's got the weak off."
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"He's a mormon."
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"You know how they are about Leap Day."
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"No, I don't, I don't know th..."
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"Ow, ah!"
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"Fine, I didn't wanna have to do this,"
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"Kenneth, I'm hoping to find you a permanent position"
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"here at the company, but it's hard to take you seriously"
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"I'm sorry, sir."
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"I just get so excited spreading holiday cheer."
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"Well, certainly you remember the joy that fills"
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"But do you know why?"
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"Oh, sir, I never know why."
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"A bonus profit opportunity."
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"I have a bet with my business school roommates"
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"every four years to see"
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"who can make the most money on Leap Day."
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"And that is why I am announcing today that cable town is"
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"purchasing Xaro, the 3-D Internet company."
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"It'll be like those Bible quotes are right in your face."
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"Yes, now take off that bald cap, Kenneth."
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"We have a lot of work to do."
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"Of course, take off my bald cap."
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"Not put on my wig."
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"Look how lame this crowd is."
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"and now he's peeping out of his shell like a... um,"
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"oh, what's that animal?"
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"You know, the one that crosses so slowly across the road"
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"and then you swerve to make sure you hit it and then a car"
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"coming the other way swerves to avoid you and goes off a cliff."
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"of your lives because you're both sharing a secret."
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"And he's coming out of his shell"
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"for the first time."
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"And when he does, he's gonna see this."
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"We really gotta get all the furniture out of here?"
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"My aquarium guy's coming to see about"
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"turning this whole room into an aquarium."
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"Who's really in the aquarium?"
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"The fish or us?"
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"Uh, Mr. Donaghy would like to inform you that,"
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""there will be no Leap Day bonuses this year."
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"What are all these letters, tray?"
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"from people who look up to me?"
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"A $50,000 benihana gift card?"
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"Oh, right, I did an ad and insisted on"
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"being paid in beni bucks."
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"Oh, no sir, this card is only good through February 2012."
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"Any other year it'd be march already."
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"But we found it today!"
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"It's a Leap Day miracle!"
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"Nothing's impossible on Leap Day."
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"It's like I said in my cameo"
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""gimme your wallet, old man!""
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"Welcome to the age of 3-D Internet."
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"Following an unintentionally racist press conference..."
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"You know the saying, "rhubarb red, eat away,"
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"rhubarb green, don't eat them.""
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"Kenneth, I've watched newt gingrich eat a plate of ribs."
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"I think my stomach can handle some rhubarb leaves."
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"Do you have any idea how long you'll be needing me today?"
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"We're both staying here until I come up with an idea"
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"to turn this day around."
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"And I'm just spitballing here..."
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"Called spitball?"
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"Sir, Rebecca Birdstein needs me."
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"Kenneth, we all have to make sacrifices."
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"Watch this."
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"Sherry, I'm afraid something has come up at work"
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"and you'll have to stay late with Liddy."
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"Uh, just dab some scotch on your neck and make your eyes"
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"How many rooms are in..."
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"It's my, uh, d&d room."
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"The gaming table comes up out of the floor."
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"Table!"
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"Frak, I'm supposed to say "floor" first."
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"Forget it, damn it!"
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