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Clips from Three's Company - Days of Beer and Weeds (S02E02)

"or birds could have carried them."
Three's Company
"I'm sure any jury in the world will believe you."
Three's Company
"Jury? You can get a year in jail for having those plants."
Three's Company
"[ Chrissy ] Oh! A yea... Well, what are we gonna do?"
Three's Company
"What do you mean "we"?"
Three's Company
""Officer, I never saw these people before in my life. Thank you and good night.""
Three's Company
"Oh, great. Then the smoke drifts everywhere and half the neighborhood gets stoned."
Three's Company
"Well, we can dig a big hole and bury them."
Three's Company
"Yeah. And next year, a whole new crop comes up."
Three's Company
"Call me."
Three's Company
"Thanks for your help, Larry."
Three's Company
"[ Hollow Whistle ]"
Three's Company
"Uh, okay. I got an idea, Chrissy. What?"
Three's Company
"We'll put this out on the balcony..."
Three's Company
"and get the cat next door to come visit it."
Three's Company
"- Ohhh. - Well, that's how you lost your fern."
Three's Company
"I think we should go to the police and ask their advice."
Three's Company
"No way! No police!"
Three's Company
"Chrissy, I feel funny."
Three's Company
"That's 'cause you've been drinking all that beer."
Three's Company
"No. I mean, coming here is a big mistake."
Three's Company
"We have nothing to fear but fear itself."
Three's Company
"I was afraid of that."
Three's Company
"You shouldn't bring those bikes in here."
Three's Company
"- What do you want? - What do we want?"
Three's Company
"Uh, okay. My name is... is..."
Three's Company
"That's true. I don't have to tell you my name."
Three's Company
"No. Not yet, anyway. Not yet, anyway."
Three's Company
"[ Jack Clears Throat ]"
Three's Company
"O-Officer. Oh! I'm sorry."
Three's Company
"Nail these things down. [ Chuckles ] Um,"
Three's Company
"Officer, if I may, we just dropped in..."
Three's Company
"to ask a few questions on... on behalf of a friend."
Three's Company
"- You don't know him. - I don't know you, either!"
Three's Company
"Well, you'd like him if you did."
Three's Company
"He's very honest and loyal, sin... No more."
Three's Company
"Cere."
Three's Company
"O-Officer, what I meant is,"
Three's Company
"uh, i-if my friend, you know,"
Three's Company
"c-committed some kind of offense,"
Three's Company
"uh, without meaning to commit that offense..."
Three's Company
"What he means is if his friend was innocent, would he still be guilty?"
Three's Company
"- Of what? - Tsk. Of what he didn't do!"
Three's Company
"Huh?"
Three's Company
"Uh, Chrissy."
Three's Company
"You know, I think we shouldn't bother the sergeant with this unimportant thing,"
Three's Company
"so why don't we just mosey... Wait a minute."
Three's Company
"Now, you said "offense.""
Three's Company
"What kind of offense?"
Three's Company
"You tell him. Oh, well, it's... it's... it's..."
Three's Company
"Anything. It could be anything. You know, uh... Oh, what?"
Three's Company
"Uh, parking. Uh, income tax."
Three's Company
"Uh, possession of drugs. No driving license."
Three's Company
"Drugs? Oh, he didn't say drugs."
Three's Company
"What kind of drugs? And what did you mean by "possession"?"
Three's Company
"- Well, uh, uh, it's a plant. - Someone's planted drugs on you?"
Three's Company
"Yea... No! No!"
Three's Company
"No. Possession of drugs is a very serious crime."
Three's Company
"Well, uh, Offi... Now,"
Three's Company
"suppose you tell me what it's all about."
Three's Company
"Well, all right."
Three's Company
"Well, uh, O-Officer, I didn't wanna bother you."
Three's Company
"Oh, look. Let's guss ferjetit... Let's just forget it, I mean."
Three's Company
"[ Jabbers ]"
Three's Company
"I'm just here to compile information for this wook I'm biting, so..."
Three's Company
"Let's get out of here. Chrissy, come on."
Three's Company
"- Just a minute. - Hmm?"
Three's Company
"Are you riding those bicycles to your home?"
Three's Company
"Just the one. [ Laughs ]"
Three's Company
"That's a little joke. I'm such a zany, madcap kinda..."
Three's Company
"No. I can't ride both of them home, so I'm just gonna take..."
Three's Company
"She has to get home somehow, so she's gonna take the girl's bike..."
Three's Company
"and I'll take the one with the bar, which is the boy's, uh, bicycle."
Three's Company
"Have you been drinking?"
Three's Company
"Who me? [ Laughing ]"
Three's Company
"Noooo!"
Three's Company
"Well, just some homemade beer."
Three's Company
"Noooo!"
Three's Company
"Did you know that it's against the law to ride a bicycle while under the influence?"
Three's Company
"You're kidding."
Three's Company
"I think I'd like you to take a breath test."
Three's Company
"Uh, no, Officer. I can breathe just fine."
Three's Company
"See? [ Panting ]"
Three's Company
"[ Hiccups, Coughs ]"
Three's Company
"Don't wanna take a breath test, eh? Fine, sir. Can you fill this?"
Three's Company
"Not from here."
Three's Company
"In there!"
Three's Company
"See ya."
Three's Company
"You didn't have to tell the cop..."
Three's Company
"that I'd been drinking it!"
Three's Company
"Tell him? He could smell your breath before you opened your mouth!"
Three's Company
"Oh, Chrissy. I'm gonna have to go to court. I'll be fined."
Three's Company
"It'll be weeks before I see my bike again."
Three's Company
"Jack. I love that bike."
Three's Company
"The cops will probably be riding it all around L.A."
Three's Company
"Ohhh. It's gonna need new tires and a new horn."
Three's Company
"Jack, we still haven't decided..."
Three's Company
"Oh, chop 'em up and put them down the garbage disposal."
Three's Company
"- It doesn't work. - Get Roper to fix it."
Three's Company
"Roper! Oh, I forgot all about Roper!"
Three's Company
"Well, he is forgettable."
Three's Company
"No! I just remembered!"
Three's Company
"Mrs. Roper is using one of the marijuana plants in her flower arrangement!"
Three's Company
"Oh, boy! We better go warn her!"
Three's Company
"It's too late. They're at the exhibition already."
Three's Company
"That's my teacher, Stanley. Mm?"
Three's Company
"Oh. She's one of the judges."
Three's Company
"Oh."
Three's Company
"Straighten up!"
Three's Company
"Try to look interested. But I'm not interested."
Three's Company
"Then try to look alive."
Three's Company
"Oh! Give me those!"
Three's Company
"Oh. Look at the way you're dressed."
Three's Company
"Did you remember to wear clean shorts?"
Three's Company
"Why, are they judging them too?"
Three's Company
"Ahhh! That's a beautiful effort, Miss Ramley."
Three's Company
"Quite poetic. Get a shot."
Three's Company
"[ Giggles ] The local press is here."
Three's Company
"Oh, yeah? [ Telephone Ringing ]"
Three's Company
"Don't smile!"
Three's Company
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