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Clips from Big Mouth (2017) - I Survived Jessi's Bat Mitzvah (S01E01)

"I'm Guy Bilzerian, attorney at law and family man."
Big Mouth (2017)
"and anyone who does magic is a disappointment to his father."
Big Mouth (2017)
"It was just a few people."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Jud, Leah, you're grounded for three weeks."
Big Mouth (2017)
"You need to dance with me at Jessi's bat mitzvah."
Big Mouth (2017)
"- Guys, stop yelling. - Honey, we're not yelling. [chuckles]"
Big Mouth (2017)
"The dress looks great."
Big Mouth (2017)
"It's so annoying. She treats me like I'm a little kid."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Nick, you got to contact my agent, Jew Fishman."
Big Mouth (2017)
"He'll work out the details."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Hi, sweetie. Just wanted to say good night."
Big Mouth (2017)
"What the hell did you just do to your mama?"
Big Mouth (2017)
"Are you talking about breast feeding?"
Big Mouth (2017)
"I drank my mommy's boobie juice till I was 12 years old."
Big Mouth (2017)
"♪ And no woman ever measured up To the love of my life ♪"
Big Mouth (2017)
"What's wrong, my love?"
Big Mouth (2017)
"- Found you! - [groans]"
Big Mouth (2017)
"No. Why?"
Big Mouth (2017)
"Listen, I know I'm not supposed to see the bat before the mitzvah,"
Big Mouth (2017)
"- [groans] Please don't give me flowers. - What? I can't help it."
Big Mouth (2017)
"I just want to, like, take you to FedEx and fill you full of packing peanuts."
Big Mouth (2017)
"They're always passing out drunk in the bath"
Big Mouth (2017)
"instead of signing your field trip permission slip."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Wha-- aah! Oh!"
Big Mouth (2017)
"Our parents are being crazy, right?"
Big Mouth (2017)
"Ohh. You mean like Fatima and Gustavo?"
Big Mouth (2017)
"Wowzie-wow, forbidden lovers?"
Big Mouth (2017)
"♪ We gather all together ♪"
Big Mouth (2017)
"That's the cantor. She just does the "music.""
Big Mouth (2017)
"Ooh, I spoke to Greg. There will be no scallops at this bat mitzvah."
Big Mouth (2017)
"- I didn't eat breakfast. - Oh, you poor starving thing."
Big Mouth (2017)
"while your dad is scratching what appears to be a troll's foot."
Big Mouth (2017)
"She should shut the fucch up."
Big Mouth (2017)
"- Hi. - Hi."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Come on, it's too dangerous out here. Come with me."
Big Mouth (2017)
"I use it to cover my bald spot."
Big Mouth (2017)
"That's a very long hug."
Big Mouth (2017)
"[kissing]"
Big Mouth (2017)
"[Nick] That's Jessi's mom."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Oh, my God."
Big Mouth (2017)
"- I can't do it. - Yes, you can."
Big Mouth (2017)
"You are a woman now, and this is what women do."
Big Mouth (2017)
"We suck up all the bullshit that the world dumps up on us"
Big Mouth (2017)
"Barbara, I lost a sock in the pews again."
Big Mouth (2017)
"DJ Pendejo coming at you!"
Big Mouth (2017)
"If you have any music requests, come talk to me."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Who the hell is Malala?"
Big Mouth (2017)
"- Lucky Malala. - That's what they call her."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Jay, why are you bringing my mom drinks?"
Big Mouth (2017)
"- Please. - He's right."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Scallops, what are you doing here?"
Big Mouth (2017)
"Stop that, please, all of you."
Big Mouth (2017)
"I'm married, for chrissakes, and these are new shoes."
Big Mouth (2017)
"- Rockports... - 9 1/2..."
Big Mouth (2017)
"I'm just here for the open bar."
Big Mouth (2017)
"- I never wanna let go of you. - Never's a really long time."
Big Mouth (2017)
"- Not when I'm with you. - Oh, I'm getting dizzy."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Not now, Maury. I've got my hands full."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Oh, I'm having so much fun!"
Big Mouth (2017)
"Everyone keeps saying how much we look alike."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Mom, stop it, you're embarrassing me."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Aah!"
Big Mouth (2017)
"Aaah!"
Big Mouth (2017)
"- Babe. - Oh, come on."
Big Mouth (2017)
"- My dad was a lemon. - My dad was a purple."
Big Mouth (2017)
"[groans]"
Big Mouth (2017)
"It-- it's so exciting."
Big Mouth (2017)
"I can already picture us getting married and having children"
Big Mouth (2017)
"[camera shutter whirring]"
Big Mouth (2017)
"Sorry, got a little handsy with Jessi's bubbie on the dance floor."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Who the fuck cares? It's way too soon."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Brings out the monster... Uh... Let me just try this one more time here."
Big Mouth (2017)
"- Lola! - What?"
Big Mouth (2017)
"I know you're cheating on Daddy with Cantor Dina."
Big Mouth (2017)
"so it's the perfect time for a speech from Mom and Dad!"
Big Mouth (2017)
"[airhorn sample blaring]"
Big Mouth (2017)
"Jellybean, wow. You've grown up so fast."
Big Mouth (2017)
"We were so happy."
Big Mouth (2017)
"But things are so different now."
Big Mouth (2017)
"- Chill, Greg. - Don't tell my dad to chill."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Can everyone please stop saying my name like that,"
Big Mouth (2017)
"♪ Love doesn't last forever It will die and break your heart ♪"
Big Mouth (2017)
"♪ And you can't have a sexual awakening Without tearing lives apart ♪"
Big Mouth (2017)
"♪ Take your mom for granted And you'll lose her in due time ♪"
Big Mouth (2017)
"♪ Whoo! ♪"
Big Mouth (2017)
"♪ Life is a fucked up mess Oh, it's a shitshow ♪"
Big Mouth (2017)
"The bad news is Jew passed away during the horah."
Big Mouth (2017)
"We're gonna get Duke points on the back end."
Big Mouth (2017)
"I'm gonna go talk to my mom."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Okay, Jay, just get lost."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Oh, my God! What am I doing?"
Big Mouth (2017)
"At least I still have a pussy."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Listen, um, about what I said in the photo booth,"
Big Mouth (2017)
"Oh, but it did. We need to face it."
Big Mouth (2017)
"I like you, but every time I have you, I lose control,"
Big Mouth (2017)
"- Connie, please? - I lost her, Maury."
Big Mouth (2017)
"With all due respect, Connie, this girl's a little fucking cunt."
Big Mouth (2017)
"And me and the boy are gonna kill ourselves tonight."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Congratulations."
Big Mouth (2017)
"I truly envy your ability to bat away every one of my insults."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Can't you let me do nice things? [groans] God!"
Big Mouth (2017)
"- Today sucked. - Your parents' speech was weird."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Eh, don't be. Love dies."
Big Mouth (2017)
"Shut up and kiss me."
Big Mouth (2017)
"- Hey, Dad, you're not a lemon. - Thanks, jellybean."
Big Mouth (2017)
"It's worse than I thought."
Big Mouth (2017)
"["I Want To Know What Love Is" playing]"
Big Mouth (2017)
"[television clicks on]"
Big Mouth (2017)
"[announcer] The following is a paid advertisement from Guy Bilzerian."
Big Mouth (2017)
"It is not approved by the New York Bar Association."
Big Mouth (2017)
"But I will happily abandon my family"
Big Mouth (2017)
"You might know me from my bench ads, my three delinquent sons,"
Big Mouth (2017)
"or my twice-institutionalized wife."
Big Mouth (2017)
"But I want you to know me as your first line of defense"
Big Mouth (2017)
"against bitch ex-wives and asshole ex-husbands,"
Big Mouth (2017)
"It's the law, not magic,"
Big Mouth (2017)
"- Jay, keep rolling. - [Jay] Dad-- oh, shit!"
Big Mouth (2017)
"We know you threw a party while we were at your father's cardiology conference."
Big Mouth (2017)
"We have half a mind not to give you these T-shirts."
Big Mouth (2017)
"- Three weeks? That's ridiculous. - Make it four. I'm writing my manifesto."
Big Mouth (2017)
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