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Clips from Seinfeld - The Wig Master (S07E07)

"He's dead."
Seinfeld
"Yeah, Tommy, this is Connie. You gotta help me."
Seinfeld
"Some guy dropped dead on top of me."
Seinfeld
"I can't call the cops because Joey might find out."
Seinfeld
"I can't. I'm stuck. You gotta help me."
Seinfeld
"This is very exciting. The inner sanctum here."
Seinfeld
"Hi, I was in the audience earlier. You threw my jacket."
Seinfeld
"- I just wanted to pick it up. - Jacket?"
Seinfeld
"- What jacket? - I had a jacket with a crest on it."
Seinfeld
"Are you sure it was me?"
Seinfeld
"- It was you or one of your brothers. - Well, two of them have left already."
Seinfeld
"- It belongs to the Friars Club. - Sorry."
Seinfeld
"- Jerry, I'm sure it'll turn up. - I'm sure it won't."
Seinfeld
"Don't worry. I'll get the jacket back."
Seinfeld
"There you go. She's gonna get the jacket back."
Seinfeld
"- I'm a little tired. I think I'll go home. - Oh, that's too bad."
Seinfeld
"Yeah, we'll do it another time."
Seinfeld
"George, we'll go."
Seinfeld
"Broke a shoelace today."
Seinfeld
"I can get you shoelaces tomorrow."
Seinfeld
"Okay."
Seinfeld
"So, what color?"
Seinfeld
"Brown."
Seinfeld
"Maybe a black."
Seinfeld
"That nut is always up to something."
Seinfeld
"Hey! Hey!"
Seinfeld
"Mama!"
Seinfeld
"Help!"
Seinfeld
"Elaine, I think I've been working you a little too hard lately."
Seinfeld
"- Well, thank you, Mr. Peterman. - The tickets are for tonight..."
Seinfeld
"...so you and Bob can knock off a little early so you both can get ready."
Seinfeld
"There's no need to deny it, Elaine."
Seinfeld
"That kind of cruelty would be grounds for dismissal."
Seinfeld
"Of course, Mr. Peterman."
Seinfeld
"Tell him I'll come down and talk to him. Okay. Bye."
Seinfeld
"Well, that was the Friars Club."
Seinfeld
"They're gonna charge me $800 for the jacket..."
Seinfeld
"What kind of show is that Sandos Brothers?"
Seinfeld
"They take your jacket and just throw it? I never heard of that."
Seinfeld
"So Susan and I were thinking dinner at our house Saturday night."
Seinfeld
"- Just the four of us. - No, I don't think so."
Seinfeld
"- Why not? - I don't know. I'm a little turned off."
Seinfeld
"Come on, what are you talking about?"
Seinfeld
"I'm... I'm kind of soured."
Seinfeld
"- Don't be soured. - I'm sorry. I'm soured."
Seinfeld
"Are you kidding? We were getting along."
Seinfeld
"Where is this coming from?"
Seinfeld
"Frankly, I didn't think she was concerned about my jacket."
Seinfeld
"What are you talking about? She's very concerned."
Seinfeld
"- She said she was gonna get it back. - Yeah, we'll see."
Seinfeld
"If she gets it back, then you'll have no reason to be sour."
Seinfeld
"You'll de-sour, right?"
Seinfeld
"- I'll try and de-sour. - That's not good enough."
Seinfeld
"I'll try. I'll try and de-sour and sweeten."
Seinfeld
"God."
Seinfeld
"- Who? - Connie!"
Seinfeld
"- What did she do? - I don't know."
Seinfeld
"But I woke up in the Hudson River in a sack!"
Seinfeld
"I think she drugged me. But she's a murderer, and I'm calling the cops."
Seinfeld
"Well, isn't it obvious? She doesn't want anybody else to have me."
Seinfeld
"- Hey, there's Uncle Miltie. - Yeah, it is."
Seinfeld
"- The comedian or the manager? - The manager."
Seinfeld
"Hey, there's Pat. Hey, Pat."
Seinfeld
"What went wrong? What's the matter with you?"
Seinfeld
"- What, are you a kleptomaniac? - I forgot to take it off."
Seinfeld
"- What, are you some sort of an idiot? - I'm sorry."
Seinfeld
"- Where's the jacket? - One of the Gypsies took it."
Seinfeld
"Of course, New York has a lot of Gypsies."
Seinfeld
"- On every block, there's a Gypsy. - Well, it's true. I saw it."
Seinfeld
"Excuse me, are you an entertainer?"
Seinfeld
"Wait a minute. Wait a minute. Look at that guy."
Seinfeld
"Isn't that guy from the show? He's wearing the jacket."
Seinfeld
"- Oh, my God. You're right. - Come on."
Seinfeld
"- Are you members? - I'm a prospective member."
Seinfeld
"Until then, that's the way out."
Seinfeld
"- That guy has my jacket. - Let's go."
Seinfeld
"- Come on. - Let's go."
Seinfeld
"It was nice of Mr. Peterman to give us these tickets."
Seinfeld
"Yeah. Yeah, it was nice."
Seinfeld
"Yeah..."
Seinfeld
"Get off of me. Stop it."
Seinfeld
"Get a hold of yourself! Bob, get a hold of yourself!"
Seinfeld
"I don't know how that guy gave us the slip."
Seinfeld
"He probably went out the back."
Seinfeld
"Hey, it's you."
Seinfeld
"No, no, that's my jacket. Give it back. Come on. I need this jacket."
Seinfeld
"I wanna join. I need it to become a member."
Seinfeld
"What is he yelling about? They're stealing."
Seinfeld
"I can't believe it."
Seinfeld
"- Hey, George, you know what? - What?"
Seinfeld
"I think this crest is different."
Seinfeld
"It's got a moose on it."
Seinfeld
"- Moose? - Yeah."
Seinfeld
"- I don't think this is the jacket. - No, it's not."
Seinfeld
"This is the jacket."
Seinfeld
"It got dirty, so they wanted to clean it before they gave it back to you."
Seinfeld
"Let's call Susan. We'll go have coffee."
Seinfeld
"I'll see you at the wedding."
Seinfeld
"Great. Now she's sour."
Seinfeld
"- Maybe she'll sweeten. - She won't sweeten. And I'm bitter."
Seinfeld
"There they are!"
Seinfeld
"Here. Here, we'll leave it there for you."
Seinfeld
"That's her, officer."
Seinfeld
"Kramer. Oh, my God. I thought you were-"
Seinfeld
"What, sleeping with the fishes? I guess I woke up."
Seinfeld
"You're under arrest for the attempted murder of Cosmo Kramer."
Seinfeld
"- I didn't do anything. - Oh, yeah. Yeah."
Seinfeld
"- Get your coat. We gotta take you in. - Can I call my lawyer?"
Seinfeld
"Okay. Go ahead."
Seinfeld
"Meet me at the police station. They're arresting me for attempted murder."
Seinfeld
"- Attempted murder? Of who? - This guy, Kramer."
Seinfeld
"- Cosmo Kramer? - Yeah, that's right."
Seinfeld
"...I'd like to begin with a hearty hail and well met, good fellow..."
Seinfeld
"...to wear jackets in the dining room."
Seinfeld
"Oh, come on."
Seinfeld
"- Elaine. - Hi."
Seinfeld
"Oh, Cosmo."
Seinfeld
"It is a real hoot."
Seinfeld
"These seats are fantastic."
Seinfeld
"- That's nice of them. - That is nice."
Seinfeld
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