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Clips from The Office - The Farm (S09E09)

"How much is a cupcake, 2.50?"
The Office
"Is that the price of our dignity?"
The Office
"3.75 a cupcake actually, 3.67 if you buy a dozen."
The Office
"I never forget a number."
The Office
"Names, in one ear and out the other."
The Office
"Places, nope. Faces, that's rich."
The Office
"I have a gift."
The Office
"Hey, man, I don't think we've met."
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"- I'm Clark. - Oh, I'm Todd."
The Office
"Oh, sorry for calling you a fat little runt earlier."
The Office
"You didn't actually say that."
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"- No? - No."
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"Wow!"
The Office
"I'm in this mode now where I'm apologizing for thoughts that are in my head."
The Office
"Hmm. [Forced chuckle]"
The Office
"Hey!"
The Office
"I have a crazy feeling..."
The Office
"that you are really gonna like this."
The Office
"Maybe we should eat the cupcakes."
The Office
"Haven't we done enough to Packer?"
The Office
"I mean, we sent him down to Florida on a prank,"
The Office
"and you did fire him."
The Office
"And it was purely political. He did nothing wrong."
The Office
"Would any of you be saying any of this"
The Office
"if the cupcakes were from Supermart?"
The Office
"Do they even have a bakery anymore?"
The Office
"They do. It's awful!"
The Office
"And it's getting worse every day."
The Office
"So it really is just about the cupcakes."
The Office
"Wow, you're right."
The Office
"It is just about the cupcakes."
The Office
"So we're all agreed no one touches those cupcakes?"
The Office
"- Okay. - Okay."
The Office
"Packer can go to hell."
The Office
"Thank you for coming to my funeral."
The Office
"As I gaze at life's big sunset,"
The Office
"I can't help but wonder where it all went wrong."
The Office
"Fanny, a single mama in the city."
The Office
"Thank you."
The Office
"Jeb, a street pusher."
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"After I left the army,"
The Office
"I bought a nine-acre worm farm"
The Office
"from a Californian."
The Office
"Turns out,"
The Office
"pain management."
The Office
"Or the smoking of pain management."
The Office
"I can't stand the fact that Jeb is a pot farmer."
The Office
"He could've grown anything."
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"Anything in the world."
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"He used to talk about growing a peanut-grape hybrid."
The Office
"We can't just sit by"
The Office
"and watch our family farm disappear."
The Office
"So here are my terms."
The Office
"Dwight, Fanny, Jeb."
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"If you come back home, I will leave you my farm."
The Office
"- So there you have it. - Is she crazy?"
The Office
"- No, no, no. - Snap out of it."
The Office
"[Snapping fingers]"
The Office
"Dwight!"
The Office
"Let's do this."
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"Let's run Aunt Shirley's farm."
The Office
"I'm in. Boom!"
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"No, no, no. I'm not moving back here."
The Office
"Look, I don't wanna be mean or, like, insulting."
The Office
"I know that you like it here."
The Office
"But, Dwight, it's just that farm life lacks a certain..."
The Office
"- sort of sophistication... - Oh, my God."
The Office
"That Cami and I are drawn to."
The Office
"And... [Sighs]"
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"I don't know, the men are just--[Sighs]"
The Office
"It's almost like there's a-- a willing ignorance."
The Office
"Yes, I-- thank you for asking me."
The Office
"I actually have written a little bit of poetry."
The Office
"That's crazy. And I was recently published."
The Office
"Which is just--"
The Office
"maybe I have-- yep, I do."
The Office
"Here it is from the, um..."
The Office
"hartfordwomenslitquarterly.com."
The Office
"[Sighs]"
The Office
"A Willing Ignorance by Fanny Schrute."
The Office
"- You know what I'm saying? Like a fart. - You know what?"
The Office
"and stay here and think about Aunt Shirley's offer."
The Office
"Oh, somehow I think a couple of nights could hurt."
The Office
"You will say yes on one."
The Office
"Get ready to say yes. One!"
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"- Yes! - Absolutely!"
The Office
"Growing up with Dwight and Mose was not easy."
The Office
"Uh, Dwight was obviously the cool one,"
The Office
"and Mose was the visionary,"
The Office
"By the way. It's not--"
The Office
"Quatre, trois, deux, un."
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"Oui on un. Oui, un!"
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"- Very clever. - Oui!"
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"- Okay. - Oui, mais oui."
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"Oui, oui, oui."
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"- Oui. - Oh, my goodness."
The Office
"♪ When we arrive, sons and daughters ♪"
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"♪ We'll build our-- ♪"
The Office
"to get people to care about that worthless sport,"
The Office
"then I can use it to get my siblings to care about the farm."
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"Nostalgia is truly one of the great human weaknesses."
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"Second only to the neck."
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"♪ When we arrive, sons and daughters ♪"
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"♪ We'll make our homes on the water ♪"
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"♪ We'll build our walls aluminum ♪"
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"♪ We'll fill our mouths with cinnamon ♪"
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"♪ Now ♪"
The Office
"So I forgot about this old custom."
The Office
"If a man is interested in courting a woman,"
The Office
"he may throw the beaks of a crow... at her."
The Office
"she has to destroy the beaks."
The Office
"♪ When we arrive, sons and daughters ♪"
The Office
"♪ We'll make our homes on the water ♪"
The Office
"Hey, uh, I just wanna say I'm sorry for screwing you."
The Office
"I'm not sorry about it."
The Office
"I am. It was my rock bottom."
The Office
"- Kevin, you can do this. - You don't know that."
The Office
"Kevin, um, let's think of something to distract us."
The Office
"Like the movie Skyfall."
The Office
"Mm-hmm."
The Office
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