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Clips from Sanford and Son (1972) - Crossed Swords (S01E01)

"We slept in the same room, same bed, same underwear."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"Do you know them shoes they had called Keds?"
Sanford and Son (1972)
"I wore my till they said "K-S.""
Sanford and Son (1972)
"Now, that's poor. You think you doin' bad?"
Sanford and Son (1972)
"Boy, you're rollin' in the lap of luxury here."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"- Hey, what's in there? - Now, just..."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"Just keep your hands off this and get back."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"This thing is very fragile, and if you make me trip and fall..."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"You better not make me trip and fall. Open that door."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"Open the door. Now get out the way. Get out the way."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"- What's in the box? - Just go over there and sit down."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"Now, I'll show you this thing when I'm ready."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"Sit. Sit!"
Sanford and Son (1972)
"I got something I wanna show you. You ain't seen nothin' like this."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"Look at that."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"Not a mark on it. It's perfect."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"Don't you touch."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"Perfect. That's what it is. It's perfect."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"It looks like a pretty good piece of china."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"China? You can't even tell china from porcelain, Pop."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"This is porcelain. Genuine porcelain."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"- So it's porcelain. - So it's porcelain."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"and a collector, which is me."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"Now, see, I reads all about this stuff."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"Now, china is the common name for all kinds of dishware..."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"Now porcelain is of hard paste."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"It's white, thin and translucent when held up to the light."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"A thing of beauty, class."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"That's me. I am porcelain."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"How would you like one across your lip?"
Sanford and Son (1972)
"You know, you're not too big to get one across your lip."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"Okay, Pop, but just look at it. Now look here underneath."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"- You see those crossed swords? - I can't see 'em."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"- Well, go get your glasses. - Wait. I'll go get my glasses."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"I bet I'll see 'em then."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"- You see? - No, I can't see it yet."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"- You see? - Wait a minute. I got some here."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"- Here's some good ones here. - You see?"
Sanford and Son (1972)
"Wait a minute."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"- You see? - Ah, yeah, I see 'em now."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"That's the trademark from some famous company."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"That means this thing is valuable."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"But if they are real, how'd you get your hands on it?"
Sanford and Son (1972)
"Okay, I'm gonna tell you."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"I'm driving along a street in Hollywood. Cherokee, Vista, I don't remember."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"But it's in a neighborhood where a lot of old movie stars live now."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"Retired, social security. Anyway, I'm driving along..."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"and I'm looking for a garage sale or a house that's being wrecked."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"All of a sudden, there's this woman standing out by the curb..."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"messin' around in the trash cans in front of a house."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"- White woman? - Yeah. She's got orange hair."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"Don't mess around with them, boy."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"Don't fool around with them, especially if they're wearing mules."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"This woman was about 90 years old."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"Ain't nothin' on earth uglier than a 90-year-old white woman."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"and one of them mules was missing a pom-pom."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"Now, I'm sure she was an old movie star."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"I mean from the silent flicks. She had to be in the silents, Pop..."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"'cause she was old, and she had a terrible voice."
Sanford and Son (1972)
""Come here, sonny, I want to show you this piece. ""
Sanford and Son (1972)
"Yeah, that's the way they talk."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"So she called me over, see..."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"and she started to telling me about this antique piece that she had."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"She said the only reason that she was willing to sell it..."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"was that she didn't have no money, you know."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"She said all she wanted was ten bucks for it."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"I didn't have the heart, so I gave her 15 bucks."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"What? She asked for 10, and you gave her 15?"
Sanford and Son (1972)
"You big dummy."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"Only way to know if it's not from the dime store is take it back to Hollywood."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"They got some shops over there on Western Avenue."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"- Western Avenue? - Yeah."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"I'm takin' this baby straight to Beverly Hills, man."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"One of them classy joints where you really get the prices."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"Yeah."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"Pop, I got a feelin' about this."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"We gonna hit it big this time."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"I mean big."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"Yes? Oh, I'm sorry. Deliveries are in the rear."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"- Deliveries? Why, you... - Wait a minute, Pop."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"- Let's get on out of here. - Wait, Pop. Look, you don't understand."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"You see, my partner and I, we've got this item here that we're positive..."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"Oh, just show him the thing, Lamont."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"- What's it to you? - Why do you ask?"
Sanford and Son (1972)
"You think we're thieves? Think we stole it?"
Sanford and Son (1972)
"Give him one, Lamont. Give him one across his lip."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"Now, look, you don't have to worry."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"See, I purchased that item from a woman in Hollywood."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"If you want her address, I'll be glad to give it to you."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"Well, I wouldn't. I'd be glad to give him one across his lip."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"- Cool it. - Continuously."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"I got a truck outside with my name on it."
Sanford and Son (1972)
""Sanford and Son. " I'm Sanford and this is Son."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"You want some identification? Here's some identification for you."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"Credit cards. Sears Roebuck. Montgomery Ward."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"J.C. Penney. Are you kiddin'?"
Sanford and Son (1972)
"Right here. There's my pastor's name and address and phone number."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"You can go by and see the Reverend Trimble."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"Here's my card right here: Exalted ruler of the Wild Moose."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"Are you kiddin', you want identification?"
Sanford and Son (1972)
"We don't need him. Let's get out of here."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"No, just a moment. Please, please. I'm terribly sorry."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"We have to ask these questions."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"You see, this happens to be a very rare piece of Meissen porcelain."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"You see, the crossed swords across the bottom..."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"are the trademark of the Meissen people."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"Oh, yeah, see, the crossed sword, that tell the whole story right there."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"Now, I'm prepared to offer you..."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"- That's genuine porcelain. - And that ain't crockery."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"- $750. - $750 for that?"
Sanford and Son (1972)
"- I think it's a fair price. - $750?"
Sanford and Son (1972)
"- Eight-fifty? We'll take it. - No. I don't know now."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"I have to discuss this with my partner before we make any definite decisions."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"how much is it worth on the open market?"
Sanford and Son (1972)
"Do you know what the markup is on that stuff?"
Sanford and Son (1972)
"If he offers us 850, it's got to be worth twice that."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"- Maybe two, three thousand dollars. - If you can get it."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"Look, Lamont, you only paid $15 for it. Let's sell it."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"Now, listen, now, it's my..."
Sanford and Son (1972)
"It's my piece, I found it, and I'm gonna put it up for auction."
Sanford and Son (1972)
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