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Clips from Umbrella Academy (2019) - We Only See Each Other at Weddings and Funerals (S01E01)

"Stop it!"
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"Diego, no!"
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"You never know when to stop, do you?"
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"Mom."
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"Let's go inside."
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""Man is as a rope"
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"stretched between the animal and the superhuman."
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"It is a dangerous crossing,"
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"for it won't come to you of its own accord..."
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"you must also remember"
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"That's not fair, Five's cheating!"
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"The ties that bind you together"
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"We can accomplish anything"
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"Don't waste your time."
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"I hope you know"
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"Take care of yourself."
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"- That's unfortunate. - Yeah."
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"When Pogo dies?"
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"- Not if you die first. - Yeah, love you too, sis."
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"You know, every time I close my eyes,"
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"I see a diarrhetic hippo about to shit on my face."
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"Lean back."
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"Sorry, sink was clogged."
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"So, what'll it be?"
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"- Uh, give me a chocolate éclair. - Mm-hmm. Sure."
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"Okay."
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"Used to sneak out with my brothers and sisters"
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"Eh."
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"Hmm. That was fast."
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"Do you ever remember a single time"
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"that Dad wasn't wearing his monocle?"
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"I'm craving..."
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"No!"
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"Wait, it's too late for eggs."
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"Ah. Of course you do."
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"I'm gonna drop you off at the bus stop. I gotta get back to work."
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"What, breaking bones and cracking skulls?"
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"Jesus!"
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"Rapists can climb."
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"You are so weird."
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"It's nothing."
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"Okay."
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"As far as I could tell, I was the last person left alive."
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"and I have no idea how to stop it."
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"43 women around the world gave birth."
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"that none of these women had been pregnant when the day first began."
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"How much do you want for it?"
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"Show me where the safe is, or your family's dead!"
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"Where's the safe?"
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"There's our sweetheart, Allison!"
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"Oh! You're perfect!"
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"Bye, Klaus."
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"We'll see you soon, Klaus."
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"Allison, will you wear Valentino to the funeral?"
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"Dad..."
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"Hey, Mom."
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"Mom?"
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"- Hey, Allison. - Hey, sis."
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"Ah. What is she doing here?"
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"You don't belong here. Not after what you did."
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"You're seriously gonna do this today?"
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"Way to dress for the occasion, by the way."
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"You know what? I... Maybe he's right."
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"- And I shouldn't... - Forget about him."
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"I'm glad you're here."
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"I can save you some time."
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"They're all locked."
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"Nothing out of the ordinary."
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"Oh, you got big, Luther."
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"Low carbs?"
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"What do you want?"
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"Well, that's because I... broke into the coroner's office."
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"And surprise, surprise, Dad's death was... normal."
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"Just a boring, old heart failure."
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"checking all the windows?"
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"- Were you the first one on the scene? - Pogo found him."
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"Can you think of a single time you saw Dad and he wasn't wearing that monocle?"
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"Which means there's a chance he wasn't alone when he died."
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"There is no mystery here. Nothing to avenge."
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"Nothing to solve, nothing like that."
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"Hmm..."
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"Not that I'm aware of."
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"It's been 16 years, four months, and 14 days."
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"Your father insisted I keep track."
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"I'm pretty sure I stepped in half those peanut butter"
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"and marshmallow sandwiches."
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"Your father always believed"
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"that Number Five was still out there somewhere."
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"He never lost hope."
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"Come along now, Allison, your father's busy."
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"Where's the cash, Dad?"
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"Where's the cash?"
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"Klaus? What are you doing in here?"
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"Hey, come here."
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"Long time."
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"Too long. Hey, I was hoping to see you, actually,"
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"Add it to my collection!"
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"I just came down here to prove to myself"
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"that the old man was really gone."
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"not one of us would be allowed to set foot in this room."
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"plotting his next torment, right?"
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"so we couldn't inherit those cold, dead eyes!"
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"Oh, wow, Luther!"
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"Wow, you really, uh..."
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"You really filled out over the years, huh?"
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"- Klaus. - Save the lecture. I was already leaving."
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"You guys can talk amongst yourselves."
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"Do it. Now."
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"It's just an advance on our inheritance!"
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"No need to get your little panties in a bunch."
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"So, Klaus is still Klaus, in case you were wondering."
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"Do you think he wears that thing in the bathroom?"
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"Yes, absolutely!"
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"Of course you don't know, you've been gone."
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"Shit."
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"Well..."
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"rumor thing."
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"Yeah, I don't do that anymore."
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"Um..."
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"Say a few words, just at Dad's favorite spot."
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